


Ice Petals

by Spunky0ne



Category: Bleach
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-07
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-01-30 17:57:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 49,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12658563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spunky0ne/pseuds/Spunky0ne
Summary: One moment. One touch was all it was. Byakuya only meant to protect his exhausted comrade's dignity by keeping him from falling. But as Toshiro warned Gerard…"You didn't really think you could touch me while I was in this form and not face some serious repercussions."





	1. Comforts of Home

Toshiro turned in his sleep, his mind racing as something in the distance chased him, making him flee in desperate flash steps, growing bigger and bigger, shaking the ground with its footsteps as it came after him.

_I have to get away!_

His mind turned one way, then another, replaying the horrors of the recently fought war in relentless color and life, so that he felt everything all over again.

Bazz-B's burner finger attack tore across his body, slashing relentlessly and sending him crashing to the unforgiving ground. As he struggled to breathe, slow footsteps approached and Cang Du's quiet, deadly voice sounded.

_"Things that lived together should die together."_

"NO!" Toshiro cried, twisting violently, but unable to come awake as unseen hands held him down and the nightmares continued.

He laid on the ground at Rangiku's side, taking barely discernable breaths and focusing on staying alive until healers came to his rescue. He heard lighter footsteps and tried to call out, but his body refused to move. A chill shot down his spine as a white clad girl with dark hair and wide, oddly innocent looking eyes gazed down at him.

_"Are you still alive?" she mused, her smile widening ominously, "Well, that's even better!"_

She bent to bring her face close to his and smiled more widely, baring sharp white teeth.

_"All it takes is a little of my blood!"_

Toshiro screamed again, nearly breaking out of his unconsciousness and writhing hard against the person who tried to hold him in place.

"Hold still, Toshiro."

Toshiro stiffened and tried again to open his eyes.

_It was Kuchiki!_

_But…Kuchiki never calls me Toshiro. It is always Hitsugaya taicho. Why did he…?_

Toshiro's mind tumbled into another long spin, taking him back to the monster that pursued him endlessly, always getting larger and larger. He flash stepped wildly, dodging the monster's reaching hands and trying to find a suitable place to turn and loose his bankai.

He felt Gerard's huge fingers curl around him and tighten painfully. The giant quincy lifted him, laughing as he prepared to squeeze Toshiro to death. But he stopped laughing as a strange cracking noise sounded and he began to slowly be encased in ice. Within his palm, Toshiro spread icy wings and smiled.

_"You didn't really think you could touch me while I was in this form, and not face some serious repercussions!" he exclaimed._

"Hitsugaya taicho!" Byakuya's deep voice called urgently, "Toshiro!"

He suddenly found that he was able to open his eyes again. He sat up too quickly, making stars dance wildly in front of his face, as he blinked and tried to focus on his noble comrade. He made out the shape of Byakuya sitting at his bedside, holding one arm close against his body and shielding himself from Toshiro's encroaching ice with his other raised arm and swelling reiatsu.

"S-sorry!" Toshiro managed as he toppled forward and crashed down on his face on the bed.

Byakuya breathed a sigh of relief and looked down to examine his injured arm. He made a sound of surprise and dismay as he noticed the ice that had attacked his fingertips was slowly crawling onto his hand, freezing the muscles and tendons, and leaving his hand useless.

"You all right, Kuchiki taicho?" Tenjiro asked from somewhere behind him, "Let me see that hand."

Byakuya extended the affected limb, allowing the spring demon to come closer and examine it carefully without touching it. Tenjiro's eyes narrowed and he grabbed Byakuya's unaffected arm.

"What are you…?" Byakuya began.

"Come with me!" Tenjiro shouted, dragging Byakuya out of the bedroom, down several hallways at a run, and into the spring room.

He yanked hard, throwing Byakuya headlong into the heated pool and watching with deadly serious eyes as the water around Byakuya's writhing form bubbled and frothed strangely.

"I'll be damned…" he muttered, his frown deepening as the heat of the pool seemed to do battle with the ice that was trying to encase Byakuya.

Back and forth the struggle went, as the pool worked quickly to relieve Byakuya of his comrade's rogue reiatsu. Small eruptions of water rose up all around Byakuya, full of froth and steaming as they nearly froze over, then crashed down again and melted. On and on the tug of war went, until finally, the ice seemed to lose its hold, and Byakuya's body fell still and just floated beneath the surface of the hot spring. Tenjiro waded into the pool and brought the noble to the surface, watching carefully to make sure that the ice didn't re-form, then flinging Byakuya across the room, into the bloody hell pond.

"Fuck me, that was close!" he breathed, shaking his head, "All of that work I did to save his skinny little noble ass almost went to waste because of that ice boy and his out of control fucking bankai!"

He smiled as Byakuya crawled out of the bloody hell pond, the red liquid sliding down his shoulders and back, over his belly and down his legs to pool at his feet.

"Maybe you should clean up a little," Tenjiro suggested.

His eyes registering disapproval and disgust, Byakuya waded back into the white bone pond and slowly washed away the awful, thick blood reiatsu.

"You should rest here awhile," Tenjiro suggested.

"I am fine now," Byakuya assured him, climbing out of the pool and picking up one of the towels that waited by the edge, "Besides, there are not enough healers and there are few who can withstand Toshiro's reiatsu if it goes out of control again."

"I'm not so sure that you did so well with that," Tenjiro commented, "Your reiatsu feels a little…off."

"I am just nearly exhausted," Byakuya said wearily, "We all are. The fights took their toll on everyone."

"You're right about that," Tenjiro agreed, "but you're going home tomorrow. You can line up the workers to rebuild your house, then lie down in a tent somewhere and sleep for a month, if you want."

He noticed the discomfited look that came over Byakuya's face and smiled.

"What's the matter? Don't you want to go home? You didn't think you'd be staying up here after the war, did you? Or were you thinking you might get promoted?"

"It is too soon to be promoting anyone," Byakuya said shortly, "and yes, I do want to go home. There is a lot to see to."

"Hey, we got word from the scouts that most of your manor is still standing. That's good, right? As a matter of fact, it's one of the few buildings still standing, so Shunsui's going to be commandeering it and sending the wounded soldiers there to recover."

"That will be fine," Byakuya said calmly, "I also have a hidden retreat that might be of some use if it survived."

"I hope it did or what's left of your home is going to get pretty crowded," Tenjiro mused.

"We will manage," Byakuya said stoically, turning away and exiting the hot spring room.

He walked back to the room where Toshiro laid and sat down at his side, sighing wearily as he removed the bandages on his comrades wounds. He spent several minutes infusing the unconscious man's body with healing reiatsu, before setting fresh bandages in place and carefully looking over his work. He looked up as a familiar step sounded in the doorway and gave his sister a look of welcome as she entered the room.

"Do you need any help, Nii-sama?" she asked.

"Aren't you watching over Ichigo and Renji?" Byakuya inquired, tilting his head slightly.

"Oh, they're doing better. Besides, I've gotten some rest here and there, and I know you haven't. You should let me watch over Hitsugaya Taicho and get some sleep."

"I am not sure that is a good idea," Byakuya said, frowning, "Hitsugaya taicho's powers have been flaring."

Rukia gave him a patient look.

"And I have an ice bankai, so he can't hurt me," she reminded her exhausted brother, "Please, Byakuya, go and rest. I promise I will make sure that Hitsugaya taicho and the others here get the care they need."

"Very well," Byakuya said, blinking sleepily as he came to his feet, "Let me know immediately if there are any changes. He was showing signs of threshold sickness from extended use of his bankai…"

"So, I will come to you if he starts to have symptoms again," Rukia assured him.

"Arigato," Byakuya said gratefully.

He left Rukia sitting quietly at Toshiro's side and walked slowly to his quarters, stopping briefly to look in on Ichigo and Renji, who still laid unconscious, sharing the same bedroom. After speaking briefly with their attendant, he walked out of the infirmary and started towards his guest room. He was almost there, when a thin, very busty red haired woman bumped her breasts into him, then laughed and shoved a large rice ball into his hand.

"Eat this, honey," the woman instructed him, "It will have you full of energy again in no time! I'd give you two, but everyone's eating so fast and so much, I've been cooking for hours!"

"Ah, arigato, Hikifune taicho," Byakuya said, accepting the snack.

"Don't be so formal, Byakuya," Hikifune scolded him playfully, "My comrades and I brought you back from near death already. We're like old friends now."

"Of course, Hikifune," Byakuya said patiently, "I do appreciate the pick me up."

"That's better, love," Hikifune said, pinching his cheeks and laughing at the way he simply stood and forced himself not to react, "Go and get some rest, now."

Byakuya shook his head and sighed resignedly, watching Hikifune rush down the hall, laughing and stuffing rice balls into the hands of the overworked healers. When she had gone out of sight, he entered his room and set the rice ball down on the dresser. He stood in front of the mirror, thinking of home, where his attendant always dressed him. His arms ached as he slipped out of his tattered clothing and wrapped a white yukata around his slender body, tying it securely at the waist. Yawning, he pulled back the covers on the bed and started to climb in.

"Don't forget to eat your snack!" Hikifune's voice said, leaking in through the closed door.

Byakuya sighed heavily and picked up the rice ball, his stomach growling, but his arms, shoulders and back aching in protest as he lifted it to his mouth. He barely managed to finish before collapsing onto the bed and falling into a deep, restorative sleep. He woke the next morning to find another rice ball on the counter, and he ate it immediately, rather than waiting for the busty squad zero taicho to scold him about it. Feeling much better, he left his room and walked back to the infirmary, where he found Ichigo and Renji awake and chatting casually.

"Hi Taicho," Renji greeted him.

"Hey Byakuya," Ichigo chimed in, "I was hoping you'd come by."

"Oh?" the noble inquired, looking at the ginger haired man curiously.

"I just wanted to say thanks for the support there at the end of the battle with Ywach."

"I was just doing what anyone would have done," Byakuya said matter-of-factly, "A taicho's work is to stop any enemy who threatens Soul Society. It is all of us who are thankful to you for assisting us."

"I just wanted to protect everyone," Ichigo sighed wearily, "It turned out I wasn't strong enough to do it on my own."

"That is why you have us, dumbass," Renji said good naturedly, "To back you up when you need a hand. That's why people like Ywach are always gonna lose. No one wants to be friends with a bastard like that."

"I guess you've got a point there," Ichigo chuckled.

He met Byakuya's eyes again questioningly.

"Hey, I heard Toshiro was banged up pretty badly and you were taking care of him," he went on, "How's he doing?"

"Hitsugaya Taicho was sleeping comfortably when I left him last night," Byakuya reported, "I will be going to check in with him next."

"Is it true what I heard from Tenjiro and Kenpachi? Is he, you know, older now?"

Byakuya nodded briefly.

"It seems that the extended use of his bankai caused the temporary aging to become permanent. It isn't going to shorten his life, though, because in actuality, he wasn't a child. He just preferred to wear the visage of one."

"I guess he has to grow up now," Ichigo mused, "I think Karin's gonna faint when she sees him. She likes Toshiro, you know."

"I see," Byakuya said, turning away, "I am pleased the two of you are feeling better. I hope you are able to make the trip back with us tomorrow."

"We should be released by then," Renji informed him.

"I will see you then."

"Bye, Taicho."

"Bye, Byakuya."

Byakuya left the room and walked further down the hallway to where Toshiro laid in bed. He paused in the doorway, watching the slow rise and fall of the young man's chest for a moment and observing the more relaxed expression on his comely face. He moved closer, sitting down next to the bed and reaching over to lift Toshiro's limp wrist to feel his pulse.

He caught his breath in surprise as his touch on the younger taicho's hand made Toshiro's eyes open and blink. Byakuya felt an odd pulling sensation, then was unceremoniously jolted out of his body and sent crashing down into his inner world.

At least, it looked as though it had been his inner world.

But the rows of plum and sakura that were usually in permanent bloom stood stark and bare, bearing little icicles that hung down from many of the branches. The air around Byakuya felt icy cold, and cut mercilessly through his clothes. He heard a strange, roaring sound and looked up, stiffening and staring raptly as he spotted a familiar looking ice dragon.

"Hyorinmaru?" he whispered questioningly.

Byakuya looked around and spotted someone in the nearby teahouse. The noble walked past the frozen koi pond and into the teahouse, frowning curiously at Toshiro as the younger man looked back at him in surprise.

"Kuchiki?" he said, a bit breathlessly, "Why are we here? What is this place?"

"This place is my inner world," Byakuya explained, "or at least, it was. It wasn't winter here before. Winter seems to have arrived along with you and your ice dragon."

"Oh," Toshiro said, coloring, "Sorry. I will…"

He broke off and met Byakuya's eyes again curiously.

"Kuchiki, have you ever known something like this to happen to anyone?" he asked.

"No," Byakuya answered, his frown deepening, "It must have to do with me spending so much time healing you. Or perhaps it was when you inadvertently attacked me while you were delirious."

Toshiro's eyes widened.

"I attacked you?" he mused, "I don't remember that at all. I am…really sorry, Kuchiki."

"There is no need for apologies," Byakuya assured him, "but I would appreciate it if you would ask you zanpakuto to leave, as he is freezing my gardens and killing the koi and plants."

"Oh, right," Toshiro said ruefully, looking up at the sky, "Hyorinmaru!"

The dragon swung around, and the two men were shocked to see and tall, masked samurai perched on his shoulders.

"Hyorinmaru, what are you doing?"

The dragon swept around in a graceful turn, then landed gracefully in front of the little teahouse. Byakuya and Toshiro exited the building and approached the two sword spirits, watching as Senbonzakura slid down and stood, patting Hyorinmaru's neck gently. The dragon looked into Toshiro's eyes and huffed a bit of steam at him.

_We were just talking. We were trying to figure out why the gardens reacted so strongly to my being here. Master, we found a conduit that leads to your inner world!_

"A conduit, you say?" Toshiro repeated, giving Byakuya a mystified look.

Byakuya shook his head and his frown deepened.

"I will have to research this when we return to the Seireitei tomorrow."

"We are going back tomorrow?" Toshiro asked curiously.

"Yes," Byakuya confirmed, "and you will be given a room at my home in which to recover."

"Oh, I will need to get back to my…"

"All of the Gotei headquarters were directly targeted in the war," Byakuya told him, "They were all destroyed. And besides, you are in no condition to be working. You were dangerously depleted, so much so that the healers have determined that you are likely to remain at this age you have reached, permanently."

Toshiro looked down at his body, and his face fell.

"Oh."

"But at least you will heal and recover your full powers. You were lucky. You could have been blown apart, using that level of power. You were extremely reckless, Hitsugaya taicho."

"Maybe, but it was necessary."

"I will not argue with that," Byakuya said agreeably, "But we should go back. I am interested to see if you will be conscious, or if you were only conscious here."

"All right," said Toshiro, "I'll try to go back too."

The two men closed their eyes and focused deeply, sending them falling back down into their bodies in the infirmary. Byakuya opened his eyes and found himself sitting at an unconscious Toshiro's side. He shivered as a little chill went through him. The cold feeling remained with him until he sensed that Hyorinmaru had left his inner world and returned to Toshiro's.

 _That was very strange_ , Byakuya mused, _I have never heard of anything like this happening before._

 _I wonder what this means_ …


	2. Pieces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya begins to suffer an odd reaction to Toshiro's connection with him.

Toshiro groaned as a heavy pounding returned to his head and he could feel that he was in a room with the lights on.

"Toshiro-kun is coming around!" Momo's voice said excitedly.

"Eh…I don't know if it's right to be calling him that anymore," Rangiku's voice answered uncertainly.

"Hmm, maybe you're right."

_Why them?_

_Why me?_

He cracked an eye open and glared up at the two, who were looking down at him, wearing curious expressions.

"Um, how are you feeling?" Momo asked carefully.

"You look…d-different," Rangiku added, "Good, but different, taicho."

"Ugh, will you two please go away?" he complained, trying to roll over and groaning again at the splinters of pain it caused in his head and the wrist of his sword hand, "I'm trying to sleep here."

He sensed a difference in his environment and sat up too fast, making his head spin and the room darken for a moment. Then, he blinked in surprise, taking in the sight of lovely, wood paneled walls, wood floors with lush, beautifully colored rugs and antique cherry wood furnishings.

"Where are we?" he mused, "This isn't…?"

"We came back a few days ago," Momo explained, "Kyoraku sotaicho told us upper seated officers to follow Kuchiki taicho to this estate. They are using Kuchiki Manor for an infirmary, so this place is for military upper officers."

"I heard that this place is where Kuchiki taicho was born," Rangiku chimed in, "It's called Sakura no Kaiyo. The orchards and house are gorgeous, and the wine cellar!"

"Don't be off getting drunk," Toshiro scolded her, "We have a lot to do, now that we're back."

"Not you, Taicho," Rangiku said firmly, "Kuchiki taicho's healer said that you have to take at least a week off."

"Well, then why are you standing around? If your taicho is injured, you should be doing something useful instead of sitting around gossiping."

"Well, someone sure found his frosty side again," Rangiku huffed, "Come on, Momo. They're going to serve dinner soon. Kami, I'm getting spoiled. You think Kuchiki taicho would let me marry into his family?"

"Not in this lifetime," Toshiro whispered as the two left the room.

He started to close his eyes again, then registered another person entering the room.

"Rangiku, I told you…!" he began, breaking off as he recognized Byakuya, who was dressed in a pale blue sleeping yukata and a warm blue robe, "Oh, sorry, Kuchiki."

"Would you like me to bring back your fukutaicho?" Byakuya asked.

"No!" Toshiro exclaimed.

He caught his breath and colored slightly.

"Sorry. I mean, she has things to do and doesn't need to be hanging around here. Eh, thanks for bringing me here to recover. You'll have to tell me when the taichos are meeting next."

"I will update you on our meetings," Byakuya said, setting down a healer's pack he had brought into the room with him, "You are still on injury leave. I had you seen by my personal healer and he insisted that you should remain in bed for another two days, then rehabilitate slowly. I will be infusing you, as Michio is otherwise occupied at the moment."

"R-right, thanks," Toshiro answered, lying back against the pillows.

He suffered a little flash of heat on his cheeks as the noble opened his yukata, and he scolded himself inwardly that Byakuya was only doing healer's work because there weren't enough healers.

_That, and maybe also that I almost froze him, a taicho, to death before. I don't think my reiatsu is strong enough right now to cause problems, but I can see why they wouldn't want to take any chances. I definitely have the potential to hurt someone._

"Kuchiki," he said, meeting Byakuya's eyes as the noble's reiatsu flowed through his hands and into Toshiro's recovering body, "I never really got the chance to thank you."

"Thank me for what?" Byakuya asked, frowning.

"For um, not letting me fall down after I used my final form," Toshiro explained.

"What are friends for?" Byakuya said quietly, "I think you would have done the same for me."

"Yeah…yeah, I would," Toshiro confessed, "You can count on that…if there's ever…"

"I hope it never comes to that," Byakuya said solemnly, "The quincy war brought us to the brink and nearly destroyed both our society and theirs."

"To think, that guy, Ywach, just saw all of his people and all of ours…everyone alive, as his food. We were just there so that he could devour our souls when we died, and he could take everything from us."

He shivered as he remembered the thousands of soldiers killed in the first wave of attacks.

"To think that those soldiers we sent out were just…killed so horribly and eaten by him. It's awful."

"I agree," Byakuya said, using a damp washcloth to clean Toshiro's face, "but we cannot be mired in the past, Hitsugaya taicho. We must do our mourning and then find a way to move on."

"Yeah," Toshiro sighed, going quiet as Byakuya continued healing him.

He felt Byakuya shiver softly and noticed that there seemed to be a very slight mist around them. When they exhaled, their breath made little clouds in the air in front of them.

"What is this?" Byakuya asked, frowning, "Is this a power of yours?"

"I don't know," Toshiro confessed, "It's strange. I don't think I'm doing anything, but you feel it, don't you?"

"I am cold," Byakuya admitted, "and growing colder. It is not like when your ice was encroaching. This is different, but it still may be an effect of your power that touched me."

Toshiro looked down at his hands and inhaled in surprise at the blue cast around them, and the feel of iciness that was invading his body.

He also felt the beginnings of arousal.

Heat flashed on his bluish tinged cheeks and he exchanged anxious glances with the spellbound noble.

"Byakuya, what's going on?" he whispered.

"I do not know," Byakuya admitted, "I should…"

"No, wait!" Toshiro exclaimed, taking hold of Byakuya's wrist.

Byakuya froze, staring back at his comrade, his breaths misting more thickly and his body feeling icy to the core.

"Kuchiki?" Toshiro inquired worriedly, "Are you okay?"

"I do not think so," Byakuya said, blinking slowly and shivering harder.

He gazed deeply into Toshiro's green eyes, unaware of when he started to lean forward. Toshiro's shaky hand extended and curved lightly around Byakuya's blushing cheek as the noble closed the distance and engaged his lips in a chilly, but deeply passionate kiss. The two kissed several times before seeming to realize together what exactly they'd done, and pulling away, flushing and staring.

"Wh-what was that?" Toshiro managed unsteadily, "Why did we…?"

"I admit I am as mystified as you are," Byakuya confessed, "But…what I felt, seemed like something I have read about in our family archive."

"Oh?" Toshiro managed, swallowing hard and pushing his thighs together to hide the hard evidence of his reaction to their unexpected kissing.

Byakuya, too, shifted to discreetly cover his reactive member.

"In the past, before the practice was abandoned, noble sons and daughters were not matched by their families, but were exposed to a certain natural compound that they drank, before being presented before a gathering of suitors. The compound was said to identify couples with a strong resonance between them, thereby matching them based on compatibility. Of course, compatibility became less important, over the years, than negotiations for power or privilege, and the procedure was abandoned. Sadly, this, over the years, has resulted in many fewer happy couples."

"I can see why," Toshiro replied, his heart skittering madly in his chest.

_What's wrong with me? I should be sort of creeped out that we suddenly kissed like that. I am Kuchiki's friend and comrade, but I've never felt attracted like this to him…or to anyone! Why is this happening? Is this because of him touching me while I was in bankai? Could this be like that resonance he was talking about? But I'm a guy! Kuchiki was married to a woman before. Why would he…?_

"Hitsugaya taicho, I apologize for being inappropriate with you."

Toshiro's blush flared a deeper red.

"I was just as much into kissing you without permission, so…don't blame yourself."

An awkward silence rose up between the two and Toshiro looked at Byakuya out of the corner of an eye.

"Eh, Kuchiki, I don't know how to say this, but are you feeling…?

"Yes."

"Ah…"

"It seems that we may have discovered a strong resonance."

Toshiro stared back at him, having no clue how to respond. He almost sighed audibly in relief as the noble came to his rescue.

"However, just because the potential exists, does not mean that the two with the resonance must act upon it. Always, the two involved, have a choice."

Byakuya broke eye contact and looked down at his folded hands.

"I will assume that you do not wish to…explore this with me, and we can simply go on as friends, if you wish."

"If I wish?" Toshiro mused.

_Does that mean he is really interested in me? Do I want him to be? Damn! This is so confusing!_

"W-well, I uh…"

He was saved again from having to voice his feelings by the return of Momo and Rangiku, the latter of which carried a food-filled tray that she set in Toshiro's lap. The young man flinched as the tray touched the sensitive bulge he had been concealing, and he gave a little yelp, then shook his head and scowled.

"Oh, sorry, Taicho," Rangiku apologized, "Was that hot underneath?"

 _She has no idea_ …

"It's…I'm f-fine!" he stammered as Byakuya returned his healing supplies to his pack and took his leave.

"I will return later to infuse you again, Hitsugaya taicho," he said, betraying no hint of what he might be thinking.

_He's probably as stunned as I am, and as embarrassed. But Kuchiki just knows how to hide it. I'll have to do the same._

"Taicho, what are you staring at?" Rangiku complained, "Did you even hear what I said?"

"Ah, no, I was…I was trying to choose what to eat first," he lied.

He gazed down at the tray, his thoughts in disarray, choosing his food blindly and barely tasting what he ate.

"Momo and I have been put in the rotation for guard duty," Rangiku informed him, "so we might not have as much time to keep you company."

 _That's a relief_ …

"You need to eat more, Toshiro-kun," Momo chided him, earning an instant scowl.

"I am not a child!" he snapped.

… _although being this way has resulted in some different, some good and some terrifying things. I am not sure anymore which I would choose, if I had a choice._

His green eyes blinked slowly as he recalled Byakuya's warm, sweet scent, the softness of his lips and the firm, hungry feel of their kisses. He felt again, the little tickle of the noble's hair brushing against his cheek and felt heat flash on his face and in that place where his thighs were pressed tightly together beneath the food tray. He was careful to keep the tray positioned carefully in his lap until the two women had gone. Then, he laid down on his side and turned to look out into the courtyard outside his room. He felt a little jolt in his insides as he spotted Byakuya standing quietly and looking up at the moon.

_Byakuya really is a beautiful man._

_I never thought about it really, but it's like I can't stop thinking about it now. But what can I do? He acted like he wasn't interested, but he could have done that so I wouldn't feel awkward…or maybe, because he thought I would reject him and he might be embarrassed. Whatever the reason, I guess what's done is done._

As he watched Byakuya, another young man with dark, wavy hair and bright sapphire eyes, that looked to be a relative, joined him and took his attention briefly away from the sky. Toshiro tried to decide if he thought the younger man was attractive to him, then he tried to think of Momo and Rangiku as attractive, but was too stymied because they felt more like relatives.

_I just wonder if this…what I am feeling, is for Byakuya, himself, or if it is just that my older body is hardwired to find a mate. But if it was for mating, then wouldn't I be attracted to a woman? Byakuya talked about matching couples. He didn't say if they were of opposite genders, but how could people of the same gender reproduce? Maybe they have to resort to using a surrogate._

A little dark twinge went through Toshiro as Byakuya's hand touched his companion's wrist, and the blue eyed man smiled warmly in response. But they showed no other outward signs of anything more than kinship as they continued to talk and look up at the moon together. After a while, the younger man left, and Byakuya spent several more minutes gazing upward with a quiet, solemn expression, before walking back into the house and leaving Toshiro looking out into the courtyard and feeling even more confusion about his gyrating emotions.

_What is this? In this body, I should be beyond puberty, but I suppose it could just be taking time for me to adjust to the differences brought on by the physical changes._

He heard Byakuya's footsteps approaching his room and feigned sleep, relaxing his body and breathing in a steady, soft rhythm as Byakuya's hands touched his rising and falling chest and belly. The infusion seemed to calm him inside, although it did bring on another painful erection.

 _Why_?

He wondered if Byakuya was having the same reaction, and if the noble was aware of him really being awake. But he kept up the charade, and Byakuya seemed not to notice or care as he attended to the needed infusion, then slipped silently out of the guest room. Toshiro sat up in the bed after he was gone, his heart pounding strangely and his hard member throbbing painfully.

_How in kami's name am I supposed to fall asleep now?_

He would have soothed his upset with a walk outside in the tranquil gardens, but knew well that his recovering body was in no shape for such a foray. He closed his eyes and tried to drift off, but shifted uncomfortably for several more hours before dropping off. And as soon as he was asleep, he found himself besieged with more dreams about the horrors of the war. He sat up suddenly, panting and shaking all over and was taken aback as he realized that someone was in the room, and that someone was holding his hand and talking soothingly to him as he gradually regained his senses. He was sure he was blushing all over when he realized that the person was Byakuya.

_He was probably here to give me another infusion and was surprised to find me going to pieces here. Damn it!_

Byakuya seemed to sense his embarrassment and said made no reference to his behavior, but only sent an attendant to make tea, then began the next infusion. Toshiro accepted a cool, wet washcloth from him and ran it over his face and throat, hating how weak it felt to be so affected by what had happened. Byakuya observed him quietly as he finished the infusion, then picked up one of the cups of hot tea the attendant had delivered, handing it to him before picking up the other and sipping at it.

"You should not feel so troubled at encountering roiling emotions and nightmares as you are. Even though the war has ended, there is a new battle we face now to rebuild the peace we lost, both inside and out. Just as our homes must be rebuilt slowly, our inner peace with not return for a long time."

"I know," Toshiro answered, looking down into his tea, "I had psychology instruction at the academy, The Psychology of War and the Aftermath. It's a required course and I probably didn't pay much mind to it. Who thinks they'll need it when things are peaceful and one's thoughts are on growing strong and building a life?"

Byakuya looked at him thoughtfully, not offering any reply, but allowing him to continue.

"The fights against Aizen and the Espada were difficult, but even the damage I took in those battles didn't feel as heavy as what I took this time. Fortunately, I don't actually remember being a zombie and attacking my own allies, but I do remember the transitions, and that being remade into a shinigami by Kurotsuchi was just as terrifying as when that girl poisoned me with her blood. It was a very big slap in the face to live through all of that, then to discover how all of us were just pawns, just meaningless sources of power for that bastard, Ywach."

He paused as Byakuya's hand squeezed his and the noble met his eyes with darker ones that he was sure understood every word he was saying.

"Hitsugaya taicho," Byakuya said, hesitating for a moment, "Toshiro, it is easy to fall into equating what that enemy said with truth, but our own truth spoke more loudly when we defeated his sternritters and elites, and Ichigo killed him. You should try to see that for the defining act it is. Our battles and Ichigo's triumph proved that we are not just cattle being raised for his consumption. We are living, breathing souls with meaningful lives and personal connections."

"But, are we really?" Toshiro asked in a low, tired voice, "We can think that from day to day, but what do our lives mean really? We are born, we live, we die in that unending cycle, but who remembers us when we're gone? Do our lives even matter at all?"

Byakuya observed him for several minutes without answering, then rose and left the room for a moment, returning with a wheelchair.

"What is that? What are you doing?" Toshiro asked, frowning at the other man's odd behavior, "Are we going somewhere?"

He blinked in surprise as the noble didn't call for an attendant, but lifted the injured taicho, himself, and set him in the wheelchair. He pushed it out, onto the walkway that ran alongside the main building and down to a room near the end that had a more intricately paneled wooden door. Byakuya touched the door and breathed a few words and the door opened in front of them. Toshiro froze, staring in wonder at the impossibly large chamber, that he was sure couldn't actually fit into the space it looked to occupy.

"Byakuya?" he inquired, barely realizing how he had slipped into more familiarity with his comrade.

His eyes swept over the tall shelves that lines the walls, the way the rows seemed to go upward and outward into oblivion. His heart pounded at the sight of the fine wood furnishings and glass cases, holding endless, and some priceless, artifacts.

_This is incredible!_

_I know what this is. He has brought me to the Kuchiki family archive. But…very few are allowed to set foot in here!_

He looked up at Byakuya through widened and questioning green eyes.

"You may know that each of the great noble clans is entrusted with a gift and a responsibility from the king. For our family, that gift is the archive you see in front of you. Our leaders are responsible for keeping a detailed record of Soul Society's history. For me, that means I must chart and record in as much detail as possible, everything that has happened. You can be sure, Hitsugaya Toshiro, that you will not be forgotten here."

He positioned Toshiro in front of a long counter, then he sat down in a wooden chair and removed a simple looking, leather bound book from the shelf in front of them.

"This is my personal diary, one of a long line of clan leader diaries. I am showing this to you to remind you that we are also kept in the memories of those whose lives we impact, not just our families and friends, but others we encounter, people we may meet only once in passing, but with whom we share defining moments…an act of kindness, a moment witnessing something of historical significance together, a moment when we do not even realize we have inspired another soul. All of these things are differences we make. Our lives are but an eye blink in history, but it is what we decide to make of it. And someone like you should not burden his heart with sadness, wondering if he will be remembered."

Byakuya opened his diary and handed it to Toshiro, who looked back at his comrade warily, then read the page he opened to. A smile touched his lips.

"This is when we went to restore Kurosaki's powers," he mused, "It's strange. It's like I can see it all happening."

"These diaries touch the mind in an intimate fashion, actually causing one to fall momentarily into that piece of history and to feel like it is happening in front of him."

Toshiro sat quietly for a moment, looking down at the opened diary and wondering. He wasn't sure how the words slipped past his lips.

"And what will I find on the page that describes…what happened earlier?"

His heart fluttered nervously and his breath caught as Byakuya turned the pages forward and allowed him to read.

_Toshiro seemed as surprised as I was, first by the flare of resonance between us, then by the telling kiss that followed. At that moment, I was stricken with the memory that resonances are never meaningless. They are never mistakes. A resonance is an opportunity to explore an important connection. Resonances are often connected to pivotal world events. If we are experiencing a resonance on this level, it may signal an approaching circumstance on which we are fated to have some kind of impact._

_More personally, Toshiro is only the second person with whom I have shared a kiss. The first was Hisana, a lost flower of the low Rukongai, vastly different from this more fiery young, male taicho with whom I am friends. I am curious, of course, but I think it best to allow Toshiro to carefully think things through. The war was difficult for all of us, and as easy as it would be to resort to accepting physical comforts to help ease the distress, loving someone physically should be about more than that._

_I shall wait and see what happens._

Toshiro's trembling hands closed the diary and he realized that he was blushing all over again. He bit at his lips anxiously, then forced a smile.

"You are…open to this?" he inquired softly.

"I think I made myself clear," Byakuya answered, setting the book back on the shelf and turning to face Toshiro, "This is not something we have to rush to decide, but more something we will decide as we go."

Toshiro wasn't sure when he had ever felt his face burn so hotly.

"Y-yeah," he agreed hesitantly.

Byakuya stood and smoothed the fine material of his sleeping yukata.

"I think it is time to take you back to your room," the noble said, touch of weariness in his voice, "I probably should not have moved you like this."

"It's fine," Toshiro said quietly, "And it's given me a lot to think about."

He took a steadying breath.

"Thank you, Byakuya."

"It was nothing."

Toshiro saw through the casual dismissal immediately, but only gave Byakuya a little smile and nodded. He was quiet and more contented as they returned to his room and the noble helped him back into bed. Byakuya was nearing the door when Toshiro felt more unscripted words escape his lips.

"Byakuya, just so you know? I am open to whatever happens as well."

Byakuya froze for a moment and then answered without looking back at him.

"Thank you, Toshiro."

Toshiro took a steadying breath to calm his racing heart as he answered.

"It's nothing."


	3. Creeping Frost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya's odd symptoms intensify...

Byakuya quivered softly in his sleep as a feeling like icy fingertips touched his spirit core. He came awake suddenly and sat up in his bed, staring in dark fascination at the swirls of mist that escaped his flared nostrils and parted lips with each exhale. He frowned, thinking back to his immersion in Tenjiro's healing pool.

_That should have been the end of it. The effect of touching him while in his full release bankai was supposed to have been countered by Tenjiro's healing water. If in actuality it was not, then…_

"Byakuya-sama, are you all right?" the noble's attendant asked from the open inner door of the master suite, "You look pale and cold again. Should I bring a healer?"

Byakuya bit his lip gently for a moment, considering.

_It seems that the warming infusions are only containing the problem. And I do not know if this will remain as it is or if it will get worse._

His eyes met Torio's calmly, despite the unsettled feeling that was overtaking his insides.

"I want you to go to Karakura Town. Please find Urahara Kisuke and tell him that I need to speak to him confidentially, and in person."

"Y-yes sir," Torio said, swallowing hard, "I will go immediately. But…I should send the healer to help you in the meantime, ne?"

Byakuya let out another icy puff of breath and shivered.

"Please do."

Byakuya breathed slowly, reaching over to take his robe from over a chair beside the bed. He wrapped it around his slender frame and distracted himself by looking out the open garden doors, into the moonlit gardens and focusing on the sweet scents coming into the room.

_There is nothing to be gained by worrying. I expect this has to do with the resonance between Toshiro and myself, brought on when I tried to keep him from falling. I only wonder why it is taking such a toll on my body. Usually resonances are a positive thing, but I believe that there have been a small number that have had problems of one kind or another with compatibility. Just because souls resonate and, in a way, are meant to share a fate, does not mean that they will be easily compatible. I need to research this._

Byakuya started to climb out of bed, but felt a swell of dizziness overtake him with alarming suddenness.

_What is happening to me?_

He wasn't sure how the clan healer managed to enter without him seeing, but the touch of the old man's hand on his chilled arm sent shivers down Byakuya's spine.

"M-michio…" he managed, blinking and puffing out more icy breath.

"Sit down, Byakuya-sama," Michio warned him, laying hands on him and starting a warming infusion, "It seems that you are being affected by your connection with Hitsugaya taicho again."

"I s-see," Byakuya managed, his teeth chattering.

The old healer coaxed him onto his back and the spinning feeling in the noble's head increased. For several minutes, he felt as though suspended between life and death, as ice and heat battled within his tasked body. But finally, the warmth seemed to reach him. His jaw unclenched and his quickened breathing slowed.

"That's it," Michio soothed him, "Just rest now. I am sure that Urahara-san will arrive soon."

"Is there anything I can do to help?" asked a young man with green eyes, who strongly resembled Byakuya's attendant, Torio, "My brother asked me to watch over Byakuya-sama while he was bringing Urahara-san."

"Some hot tea would be good," Michio suggested, "Thank you, Koji."

"It's no problem," Koji assured him, bowing and exiting the room.

Michio gave Byakuya a sympathetic look.

"I am sorry, Byakuya-sama. I don't understand why this is happening. I haven't seen anything like this before."

Byakuya shook his aching head gently.

"This is not something that we could have anticipated. Shinigami powers are sometimes difficult to understand. I am certain that Urahara Kisuke will be able to shed some light on the situation."

The two men looked up curiously as Koji returned to the room with another of the Kuchiki leader's cousins at his side.

"Tetsuya," Byakuya greeted the blue eyed man, "did Koji wake you?"

"No," Tetsuya assured him, "I was checking in with the guards and on my way inside, I saw him in the kitchen, preparing your tea. I wanted to be sure you are all right."

"I am fine for now," Byakuya assured him, "Michio was able to return my body temperature to near normal."

"It is still quite low," the healer complained.

"But," Byakuya said firmly, "Urahara Kisuke is going to be here soon. I have no doubt that he will be able to give me some answers about the best course of action."

"Well," Kisuke said, peeking into the room from behind Tetsuya and giving the noble a cheerful smirk, "thanks for the endorsement, Kuchiki taicho."

He moved forward, claiming a seat beside the noble's bed and examining him as Torio hurried into the room and took up a position next to his brother and Tetsuya.

"So," Kisuke said, opening Byakuya's yukata and slipping a thermometer into his mouth, "Torio, here, tells me that you're still having troubles like when you were up top and got zapped by Snow-Shiro while you were healing him. Why don't you tell me what's happened since you came back? Tenjiro already briefed me on what happened up there."

Byakuya nodded, quietly watching as the shopkeeper touched the area over each of his spirit centers, then took the thermometer from his mouth and read the result.

"Hmm, pretty low," he commented, "but not dangerously."

"We have had trouble maintaining his body temperature off and on, ever since he arrived home," Michio reported, "I have been giving him warming infusions over the past few days and they do bring his temperature back up. However, it seems that the need for treatments is becoming more and more frequent, and the frost spells, as I call them, are increasing in severity and length. In short, I don't think I can get this under control."

"That's okay," Kisuke said reassuringly, "That's why I'm here."

He gave Byakuya a curious look.

"Tenjiro said that you and Toshiro both reported entering your inner world and that there was an anomaly of some kind?" he asked.

"Yes," Byakuya confirmed, "It appeared that a conduit had opened between our inner worlds and his zanpakuto was freezing my inner world. We convinced him to stop and we returned."

"And you haven't tried to go back into your inner world since?" Kisuke asked.

"No," Byakuya admitted, frowning, "I did seek information on resonance, which I suspected might yield some answer, however, I was feeling too ill to complete a thorough search."

He reached over and withdrew a gold token from within the nightstand. He held it between his palms and infused the device with a touch of his reiatsu, then handed it to Kisuke, who nodded in acceptance.

"That will allow you to enter the archive so that you can continue the search. If you need assistance, Torio can also enter the archive to help you."

"I can stay with Byakuya-sama," Koji offered, glancing at Tetsuya, "if that is all right, Tetsuya-san?"

"Of course," Tetsuya said, nodding, "I am only going to be sleeping. I was on duty until just now."

"Okay," Kisuke said, "Just one more thing. I'd like to have you and Toshiro try to enter your inner worlds and talk to Senbonzakura and Hyorinmaru. Maybe they know something that we don't."

"They did not seem to before," Byakuya informed him.

"Well, you haven't been in since then, so maybe they've discovered something. Can someone go and bring Toshiro?"

"Is it really necessary to do this now?" Byakuya asked, "Toshiro is exhausted. He started physical therapy today."

"Well, that all depends on whether you want to get this done before or after you turn into a pretty little snowflake and maybe die on us," Kisuke said saucily, "But it's your choice, of course, Kuchiki taicho."

"Fine," Byakuya said shortly, "Torio, will you please wake Toshiro and bring him?"

"Hai," Torio answered, bowing and leaving the room.

He hurried down the hallway, slowing as he reached the tenth division taicho's guest room. He was surprised to find Toshiro out of bed and working quietly at the desk in the room.

"Ah, excuse me, Hitsugaya taicho," Torio said politely, "Urahara Kisuke has asked me to escort you to Byakuya-sama's chamber."

Toshiro's eyes widened.

"Is Byakuya all right?" he asked quickly.

"Oh, he is okay now. He just…had another drop in his body temperature…"

"Another?" Toshiro exclaimed softly, "It seems like they're getting closer together."

He started to stand, then made a sound of pain and grabbed onto the chair as Torio slipped an arm around him.

"You must still move carefully, Hitsugaya taicho," the attendant chided him, "You are making good progress, but…"

"Yes, I know," sighed Toshiro, "I just…feel responsible for Byakuya's condition."

"You know he doesn't blame you, sir," Torio insisted, supporting the injured taicho as they left the guest room.

"But it was my zanpakuto that started all of this," Toshiro said in a frustrated tone, "I have spoken to Hyorinmaru, but he can't give me any answers either!"

"You know that's because it isn't your zanpakuto, but the unusual resonance you have with Byakuya-sama."

"It's still my power that's the problem," Toshiro pointed out stubbornly, "He is suffering constantly from hypothermia. You can't say it's not my power hurting him."

"I'm sure it will be fine," Torio said reassuringly, "You must trust Byakuya-sama to handle this. He has called Urahara Kisuke to help, so you know that…"

"What I know is that Urahara and Shihoin Yoruichi drove Byakuya nearly insane with their teasing when he was younger."

"How do you know that?" Torio asked, giving him a curious look.

"Oh, he was sharing some entries from his diary with me, while we were looking for clues to this condition."

Torio smiled.

"Byakuya-sama must like you very much to share something so private," he commented, "It's not like him to do that."

Toshiro found himself lost for words for a moment.

"W-well…anyway," he said, trying to change the subject, "Byakuya would only turn to Urahara Kisuke if his condition was very serious. It's only natural I would feel upset about that."

"Of course, Hitsugaya taicho," Torio agreed, "I am sorry. I was trying to make you feel better."

"Thank you for that," Toshiro said sincerely as the two reached Byakuya's room and stepped inside.

They found Tetsuya and his attendant still standing near the door, while Kisuke and the clan healer leaned over Byakuya, examining his spirit centers and speaking quietly. At their entrance, Kisuke looked up and smiled.

"Hey, Toshiro," he greeted the white haired taicho.

He paused and shook his head, smiling more widely at the young man's comely appearance.

"Man, I just can't get used to the new you," the shopkeeper mused.

"You're wasting time," Toshiro said brusquely, "You can see that Byakuya is uncomfortable."

"Byakuya," Kisuke said, smirking as he looked down where his hands were touching the Kuchiki leader's abdomen, "Don't you usually call him just Kuchiki?"

Toshiro blushed.

"That's hardly why Byakuya asked you to come here," he snapped defensively, "Can you tell us anything about what's happening or not?"

"Whoa, easy there, Snowy," Kisuke chuckled, "Give me a second. I've heard from Byakuya, here, and I've checked him out, but I also need to check you out a little too."

"Why?" Toshiro asked, frowning, "There isn't anything wrong with me."

"Well, you never know," Kisuke said, crossing the room as the white haired taicho sat down in a chair.

He leaned over Toshiro, shoving a thermometer into his mouth.

"Ith justh going to thay mine isth low," Toshiro complained around the device, "Iths alwayth a little low. Thaths not sthrange for me."

"Okay, fine," Kisuke said, feigning defensiveness as he removed the thermometer, "It's just for my records. I can compare it to the fourth division database to get a history on that. How are you feeling? Chilly? Sore?"

"More like annoyed," Toshiro said dryly, "I feel fine. Byakuya is the one who needs this, not me."

"Hmmm, attitude even more aggressive than usual," Kisuke said under his breath.

"What did you say?" Toshiro demanded.

"Oh nothing," Kisuke said blithely, "Have you felt ill at all in the last few days? Antything during these episodes Byakuya has?"

"No. Nothing at all. I don't see why you're giving me so much attention. Byakuya needs your help. You can see how pale he looks, even more than normal. You have to do something."

"I am going to do something," Kisuke promised in a more serious tone, "I am going to the Kuchiki archive to have a closer look at the information on resonance, then I'll be back here to let you guys know what I can find."

"Fine," Toshiro said, "I'll wait here for your report."

Kisuke gave him a teasing grin.

"Well, I don't know how ol' Byakuya will feel about you curling up with him for the rest of the night, cause that's how long I might be in there, looking."

"I…" Toshiro began.

"Toshiro," Byakuya said quietly, "if you would like to wait here, then you are welcome to rest in the attendant's recess in the corner of the room."

"I…w-well…"

"That sounds like a good idea," Torio agreed, "You looked like you weren't getting much rest in the guest room, doing all of that paperwork."

Byakuya frowned.

"I thought you were still on injury leave."

"I am," Toshiro confessed, "It's just that if I leave the paperwork to Rangiku, then it will just never get done, and the stack will be twice as high when we go back to work. I don't know how you trained Abarai to be so diligent…"

"It was not easy," Byakuya sighed.

"I have tried everything short of locking her in her quarters until she's done, but it…"

"Ah, I'll just leave you two to discuss the ins and outs of fukutaicho training," Kisuke snickered, nodding in Torio's direction, "Come on, we'll leave the boys to talk."

"Byakuya-sama, if you'll not be needing anything, Koji and I will excuse ourselves as well," Tetsuya said.

"I'll be going also," Michio added.

"Good night, _watashi no itoko_ ," Byakuya said, nodding, "Michio, Koji."

"Thank you for agreeing to watch over Byakuya-sama tonight," Tetsuya said to his attendant as they left the room.

"Just let me know if you need anything as well, Tetsuya-san," Koji replied, watching as Tetsuya disappeared down the hallway and into his bedroom.

Toshiro felt an awkward twinge inside at finding himself alone with Byakuya.

"I think I'll just go back to my room," he said, turning away to hide the little flush on his face.

"Toshiro," Byakuya said, stopping him, "I have a feeling you will not rest if you go back to your room. You should stay and rest here. That way, whenever Urahara Kisuke returns, you will be here."

"Eh…all right," Toshiro answered hesitantly, "So…the uh…"

"Attendant's recess," Byakuya said, pointing to a curtained off area of the room.

"Right."

Strangely, when he entered the area behind the curtain, he found that although no one could see in, he could look out and see Byakuya had turned onto his side and was looking quietly out at the moon. With a sigh, Toshiro dropped onto the bed, not bothering to take off his robe or to get under the blankets. He watched as Byakuya curled around his pillows and drifted off to sleep, unable to sleep, himself, because of the little jabs of guilt he felt inside.

_I hate that it's my fault he's like this. Why did he have to catch me when I started to fall? Why did he have to try to heal me? Damn!_

Byakuya's voice rose up in his mind, reminding him of the deeper facts of the situation.

"At that moment, I was stricken with the memory that resonances are never meaningless. They are never mistakes. A resonance is an opportunity to explore an important connection. Resonances are often connected to pivotal world events. If we are experiencing a resonance on this level, it may signal an approaching circumstance on which we are fated to have some kind of impact."

"We've just been through two bitter wars," he whispered, "I don't want to think we might face something more like that…or worse."

It took him a long time to fall asleep, and even when he did, he tossed and turned, suffering visions of Byakuya with pained eyes and blue tinged, frozen skin.

"Byakuya!" he cried, his eyes flying open as he sat up in the bed, panting and shaking.

He blushed brightly as he realized that Byakuya was awake and looking in the direction of the attendant's recess where Toshiro sat.

"Are you all right, Toshiro?" the noble asked as Koji appeared in the doorway, wearing a spooked expression.

"I am fine," he assured the two, "It was just…just a nightmare."

He laid back down, turning towards the wall and breathing slowly to calm his racing heart.

 _I hope Kisuke finds an answer soon. I don't know what I would do if my errant power caused him to_ …

_No, I can't think that way._

_I won't think that way._

But as soon as he drifted off again, the horrid dreams returned.


	4. Protections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Toshiro learn from Kisuke that their situation will require an interesting response.

Toshiro woke to the sound of soft, urgent voices and he turned over to find Koji and Michio were at Byakuya's side and working quickly to warm the once again bluish tinged and shivering noble. Twinges of guilt touched his insides and he wondered if he should remain still and pretend to be asleep or if he should leave the recess and at least try to be of some assistance.

_Although, I don't think there is anything I can do. I'd just be standing around. It might be more useful to visit my inner world and see if Hyorinmaru has learned anything new._

He focused intently, closing his eyes and traveling through the connection with his zanpakuto. He stepped down into his inner world and found the ice dragon turned into human form and sitting next to Senbonzakura. Neither seemed to notice him and he blushed brightly as he realized that the samurai's mask had been removed and Hyorinmaru was leaning in to kiss Senbonzakura.

 _Crap_ …

Hyorinmaru flinched, suddenly registering that he was there and instantly exploding into dragon form. Senbonzakura turned his face away and swiftly set his mask back in place, but not before giving the surprised taicho a stunning glimpse at the shockingly handsome face that the mask was hiding.

_Whoa…_

_No wonder Hyorinmaru is attracted to him. But I thought that only Byakuya was allowed to see him without his mask._

Senbonzakura rose and turned to face him.

"I apologize for intruding," he said politely, "I will go."

"Senbonzakura," Toshiro said, stopping him, "I'm sorry to have interrupted. I am sure that there's nothing wrong with the two of you being…well…intimate or…"

His blush deepened and he had the oddest suspicion that the samurai was smiling beneath his mask.

"I mean…" he stammered, "kissing or whatever. I just wanted to ask Hyorinmaru if he had any suspicions about why Byakuya is suffering such strong and dangerous side effects from when he touched me while I was in bankai form."

The samurai stood silent for a moment, then turned away.

"You should ask him," he answered enigmatically, "I think he should be the one to explain it to you."

Toshiro scowled.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he demanded of the departing spirit.

He let out a huff of breath and his scowl deepened as the samurai disappeared in a flash step.

"Well, that's just great…"

He looked up into the sky and found the ice dragon sailing overhead in a stormy looking sky, letting out intermittent howls and turning this way and that.

"Hyorinmaru!" he called sternly, "Please come here. I need to talk to you."

The dragon turned and headed in his direction, puffing out mist and leaving a white trail in his wake. He reached the tenth division taichou and circled around, over his head.

"Down here," Toshiro directed him, arching an eyebrow, "What's gotten into you? And before you don't bother to do it, will you change to human form? My head hurts too much to have you shrieking in my ears."

The ice dragon growled ominously, but shuddered and broke apart, revealing a warmly dressed man with long, teal green hair and handsome grey eyes that reminded him vaguely of Byakuya's.

"You seem agitated, Master," the spirit observed calmly, "What is troubling you?"

"What do you think is troubling me?" Toshiro asked stridently, crossing his arms, "I think you know very well that Byakuya is being hurt by the power of our completed bankai! I want you to tell me all that you know about how to treat his condition."

Hyorinmaru nodded respectfully.

"Of course I will tell you," he answered, still in that calm, collected voice, "But you should be aware that some of what I have to say may be rather…unsettling for you."

Toshiro gave him a worried look.

"We're not going to kill him, are we?" he asked, "I mean, the healer is very concerned that his symptoms are getting worse. I notice that Senbonzakura doesn't seem to be suffering from ill effects from being in contact with you. Byakuya was still in bankai when he touched me, so Senbonzakura must have been affected also."

"Yes," Hyornimaru answered, glancing in the direction the comely samurai had gone, "he was."

Toshiro gazed at the spirit expectantly and, after a minute of silence, made a sound of impatience.

"And?" he prompted his counterpart.

"He came to me and we discussed what was happening."

"And?"

"We tried warming him up and it worked at first, but then did not."

"That sounds like what is happening to Byakuya," Toshiro said thoughtfully, "Now, we're getting somewhere. What did you do next?"

"We tried making fire, but I kept putting it out by accident."

"It figures…Then, what?"

"Well, we went swimming in a hot spring to give us time to think. He was going to leave his mask on while he bathed, but I convinced him to relax and take it off…that I would not look directly at his face."

Toshiro endured another odd silence and rolled his eyes.

"And what happened next?" he asked impatiently, "How did you cure his condition? I need to know so that, whatever it is, I can do it with Byakuya! So, get on with it!"

Hyorinmaru paused, biting at his lip for a moment before continuing.

"I only peeked out of the corner of an eye. I didn't look directly…"

"But?" Toshiro prompted him.

"But, it seems, even looking out of the corner of an eye was enough to tell me that Senbonzakura is beautiful beyond all imagining. I was instantly smitten and nearly passed out in his arms."

"Oh my kami? Why do I even bother?" Toshiro groaned, slapping his forehead, "Will you please just get to the point? How did you cure Senbonzakura? You must have done something! Tell me what you did. And no more beating around the bush. Just say it, okay? I don't have all year. Byakuya is turning into a popsicle!"

"Very well, I will tell you," Hyorinmaru said soothingly, "I am sorry for being evasive, but it is a little embarrassing to talk about."

"Embarrassing," Toshiro mused, frowning, "What do you mean, embarrassing? You admitted you were naked with him in a hot tub. What's more embarrassing to admit than that?"

Hyorinmaru cleared his throat softly and met Toshiro's agitated eyes meaningfully. Realization flooded almost painfully in the shinigami's stunned mind.

"N-no…" he managed weakly, putting a hand over his mouth.

"Well, Senbonzakura is a very beautiful man," Hyorinmaru said emphatically, "His master is lovely too, if you don't mind me being honest. I can tell that you are attracted to him, and he is attracted to you. Maybe…"

Toshiro was sure there wasn't an inch left on his body that wasn't blushing.

"I like Byakuya and he likes me!" he snapped more angrily than he meant to, "But that doesn't make us ready to…to…do that!"

"For your own safety and his," the spirit went on, matter-of-factly, "you should really meditate or engage in some relaxing massage before or the penetration can hurt if you're too tense."

"I just said…!"

"Master," Hyorinmaru said patiently, "I know this is awkward, and being that Byakuya is a gentleman, he will, I am sure, try to hold out long enough so that another way can be found, but as a last resort, as we've proven, this will work. With the power of the resonance between you, do you really think you won't eventually fall in love?"

Toshiro froze for a moment.

_That's really what my agitation is about, isn't it? I wonder if the resonance means that we are meant for more and that we will fall deeply in love. I am attracted to him now, but I've never been in love. I don't know how it's supposed to feel. We are open to this attraction, but that's a long way from being ready to…to…to go to bed together. There, I said it! Or at least, I thought it. I don't know if I can say it to him. Damn! What am I going to do?_

"It seems that you need time and space for thinking," the spirit concluded, turning away from him, "I will go, but I will be nearby if you need to talk anymore."

It didn't escape Toshiro that he headed in the direction Senbonzakura had gone.

_I have more important things to do than to worry about what they're up to. I have to figure out another way. There has to be one. Okay, so having sex is just a kind of close connection. There are other ways to make a connection, right?_

_Oh gods, this is not going anywhere! Maybe I should go back and...and what? I'll die of embarrassment if I have to tell Byakuya that we have to have sex or he'll freeze to death! How does someone just say something like that? But I should go back anyway, because I need to know if Kisuke has found anything. I mean, if anyone can find an answer…another answer besides what those two did, he can. Ugh, but I'm sure he'll have no problem teasing me about sex being an option. I just hope it's not the only option. The truth is, if I do go to bed with Byakuya, I want to be in love with him and him with me. I don't want my first time to be with someone who doesn't want me._

_But…his own words said he might want me._

_Damn it all!_

_Why did I ever use that stupid final form?_

Toshiro took a steadying breath and focused on his resting body. He was carried gently back into his quiet, resting form that was still curled up in the bed in Byakuya's attendant's recess. He heard Urahara's voice out in the bedroom and he climbed out of bed and limped in to join the others.

"Hey, I was just about to have Torio come over there and wake you up, sleepyhead," Kisuke teased him, "I have some results I need to talk to you about. And I may be able to help you with finding a solution."

_A solution? As in one? Please don't let it be that one!_

"I checked out a lot of good references on resonance and I ran a number of tests to determine your level of resonance and your level of compatibility. You won't be surprised to hear that, while you and Byakuya are resonating at a significantly high rate, the compatibility of your powers is notably less."

"Which explains why Byakuya is slowly freezing to death," Toshiro said, frowning.

"Yeah, exactly," Kisuke agreed, "So, I ran some more tests to try to get a read on what it is going to take to settle things down and get you two more comfortable so that one of you isn't freezing to death."

"And?" Toshiro asked, glancing at Byakuya, who looked back at him with a calm expression.

"Well, it kinda comes down to getting your reiatsu to blend so that the exchange is at a more comfortable level and not so dangerous to Byakuya. We also want to avoid melting your ice completely, since we want you to be able to use your powers the way you're used to."

"A resonance can change our powers?" Toshiro asked, blinking in surprise.

"Sometimes," Kisuke confirmed, "Now, there have been cases where powers were badly incompatible and one or both lost their powers. But those are rare cases, and your powers, while not terribly compatible, are not incompatible on that level."

"What does all of this mean?" Byakuya asked, "How do you propose that we blend our reiatsu?"

"Ah…um," the shopkeeper muttered, his reticence making Toshiro cringe and Byakuya give him a curious look, "well, there's a way that romantically involved couples, which you and Toshiro probably aren't too interested in."

"I see," Byakuya said, stiffening slightly and noting that Toshiro looked unsettled, but less than surprised at the announcement, "Do you have another solution more appropriate for people who are not romantically involved?"

"Sort of," Kisuke hedged, "See, the thing is, there aren't that many ways to gently and effectively blend reiatsu in a person's body. That's why…erm…the other way I mentioned works so well. Sex makes you relax, so…"

"We understand," Byakuya said shortly, suffering a little inward twinge at noticing how brightly the eleventh division taicho was blushing, "So, we need to be very relaxed."

"Relaxed, but conscious," Kisuke clarified, "And there needs to be some emotive connection between you."

"How are you going to stimulate…" Toshiro began.

He choked on the last word and couldn't seem to recover enough to continue, prompting Byakuya to step in.

"What method do you suggest to bring about the proper state of calm and connection?" he asked.

"I'm thinking that I can hook the two of you up to a machine that will give you a little dose of something soothing and another that will give you the uh…the…"

"Connective stimulation?" Byakuya inquired.

"Yeah, that!" Kisuke affirmed, "You wouldn't have to be touching each other, but you would feel connected because of the hallucination. I'll feed lines from your spirit centers to Toshiro's and your bodies should achieve a balance before you c-come…erm…out of it, that is."

"And what is your level of certainty that this will bring us into balance and stop the freezing episodes I have been having?" Byakuya asked.

"As long as you both are relaxed and focused on the connection, it should work fine. Can't see why it wouldn't. Only thing is, I'll be honest with you, the simulated interactions might be a little intense. Just remember, they aren't real."

"All right," Toshiro said stiffly, "I don't exactly like it, but it seems like that's the best we can do."

"When will you be ready for the procedure?" asked Byakuya, "Can it be done here at Sakura no Kaiyo or will Toshiro and I need to go to your lab in Karakura Town?"

"Eh, some rebel quincies got into my place and messed things up pretty badly, but I can have the stuff here to do that by tomorrow night."

"Tomorrow night?" Toshiro objected, "But Byakuya is really uncomfortable now. Can't we send some attendants to help and get it done faster?"

"Everybody's pretty busy with picking up the broken pieces of Soul Society and keeping folks from dying," Kisuke said, shaking his head, "You're going to have to keep warming him until the stuff for the procedure arrives."

"Boss?" a male voice intoned from the inner doorway.

"Tessai, I'm glad you're here," Kisuke said in a relieved tone, "Can you and Jinta go back to the lab and bring the…"

"Sorry Boss, that's what I came to tell you," Tessai said unhappily, "Someone broke in and broke up what wasn't destroyed the first time."

"They busted the lab equipment?" Kisuke asked in an agitated tone, "Damn it! It's customized equipment. It'll take me a month to rebuild it!"

"Byakuya doesn't have a month!" Toshiro shouted, "He's going to die and it's going to be my fault. I don't care. We'll just…we'll…"

His throat tightened and he couldn't make himself meet Byakuya's widened eyes.

"Uh…" Kisuke managed, clearing his throat, "O-kay. Well, if you're um…going that route, you really don't need any help. Just uh…have Michio-san keep me up to date and keep a close watch on Byakuya after you…after um…well…after."

Kisuke glanced at the attendants and aged healer in the room with them.

"Let's give'em some privacy, okay?"

Byakuya waited until he was alone with Toshiro, then he met the younger taicho's stormy eyes tentatively.

"You know that you do not have to do this," he assured Toshiro.

"What do you mean?" Toshiro sighed resignedly, "Michio said that he can't stay ahead of this forever. A month is too long."

"We could see if it could be done faster somehow," the noble suggested.

"It's specialized equipment," Toshiro countered, "Maybe Kurotsuchi could have mocked something up for us, but his lab was destroyed also…and the fourth division headquarters was destroyed too. Let's face it. This is the way we are going to have to solve this problem. At least we are attracted to each other, so…this won't be as awkward as it would be if we were not even friends."

"But we are sexually innocent," Byakuya reminded him, "Shouldn't our first time be with someone who we love?"

"I'm okay with…"

Byakuya's words repeated loudly in Toshiro's head.

"WHOA!" he gasped, "You said we are sexually innocent?"

"That is what I said," Byakuya affirmed.

"But you were married," Toshiro objected, "You said you kissed her. You loved her, right?"

"I did," Byakuya confessed, "But Hisana was too delicate for sexual relations, especially with a man with my intense reiatsu. I did not want to hurt her, nor did I want to impregnate her, as it would have hastened her decline. So, I am as sexually innocent as you are."

Toshiro frowned.

"How would you know if I was…?"

"You have only recently mastered your final form, ne?" Byakuya pointed out, "That would have left only a small window of opportunity for…"

"Right," Toshiro said shortly, his blush returning, "Well, I suppose that if we're going to do this, we should just…get it over with. I don't want you to die and we can't wait for the machinery to be fixed, so…"

Byakuya gazed back at him silently as Toshiro climbed onto the bed.

"So…where do we begin?" the younger man asked.

Byakuya hesitated, then started to speak. But a moment later, the door opened and Kisuke stepped back into the room.

"Sorry guys, I thought that you might need one of these."

He handed Byakuya a silver pendant, then exited the room quickly.

"What was that? What is that?" Toshiro asked, looking confused.

"It is a protection charm," Byakuya explained, "He brought it because he knows that I am a Breeder male."

"Huh?" Toshiro asked, looking at him blankly.

"I am a Breeder male," Byakuya repeated, "If we have unprotected sex, I can either impregnate you or I can become impregnated."


	5. Hot, Wet, Steam

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Toshiro take an extreme step to cure Byakuya's condition.

Toshiro stared back at Byakuya wordlessly for a moment, his turquoise eyes slightly stricken at the other taichou's admission.

"You can…?" he began, breaking off again and shaking his head as he tried to absorb the meaning of the words.

"Do not worry," Byakuya assured him, "the protection charm will prevent you from becoming pregnant."

_Oh...then he is…he is going to enter me?_

Byakuya read his stunned expression.

"Hitsugaya taichou," Byakuya said, his voice respectful and at the same time, matter-of-fact, "I am a clan leader. When unmarried and with a sexual partner of lesser status, I am required to assume a dominant role."

_A dominant role. Then, he is going to penetrate me. I mean, I suppose I should have expected. He is a clan leader, after all, and I am a commoner, even though I am also a taichou._

"This is not personal," Byakuya went on, "On the off chance that something went wrong with the protection charm, the elders of the clan would want assurance that I would not be left impregnated and out of wedlock. Because I am expected to maintain an active public presence, it is easier to hide such a thing for the protection of our honor, if my partner is the one…affected."

"Oh," Toshiro managed stiffly, "right."

"But this is likely unimportant, as failure of these charms is very rare."

"That's good," Toshiro said weakly, "Just great…"

Byakuya paused and studied his colleague's stiff posture and discomfited expression. He sighed softly.

"I think it is necessary to relax you before we can begin," he commented, "You are very tense."

"Really?" the white-haired shinigami mused, shaking his head, "You think?"

Instantly, he regretted his sarcasm as he spotted the hint of guilt that touched Byakuya's pale features.

 _It's not like it's his fault. He was just safeguarding my dignity by stopping me from falling. He didn't know what my bankai was going to do to him_.

"Sorry," he apologized.

"Why are you apologizing to me, Toshiro?" Byakuya asked, surprising him with the more casual use of his name, "Your tension is completely understandable, considering the circumstances. I will do my best to put you more at ease."

"Eh, thanks," Toshiro said uncertainly, "I don't know if anything really can, but you have to be feeling kind of the same way. You're just better at always looking calm."

_What will Byakuya look like in orgasm?_

Toshiro sucked in a sharp, unscripted breath and choked on it, earning a curious look from the surprised noble.

"Maybe we should try to relax by bathing together," Byakuya suggested.

"You want to take a bath with me?" Toshiro inquired, "I mean, I guess that's okay."

_Why did I think that about him?_

_I didn't mean to_ …

"Torio," Byakuya said, raising his voice slightly.

"Sir?" the attendant answered, appearing in the inner bedroom doorway.

"Please summon Akio and have him meet us in the bathing chamber."

"Hai."

"We need attendants to bathe?" Toshiro mused, following Byakuya out of the room, "I mean, I've heard of noble families having servants…erm…attendants who bathe them. I just never had anyone do that for me."

"Hmm," Byakuya replied, barely acknowledging his words.

Toshiro's feet skidded to a stop and he stared, open-mouthed, as they entered the large, domelike outbuilding that housed the family bathing chamber. The room, itself, had obviously been crafted to seem like an extension of the gardens outside it, with expanses of dark green grass, lush bushes and bright flowers everywhere. The bathing pool dominated the center of the room and was filled with hot water that steamed on the riled surface. A few bathing areas contained bubbling tubs, and near the far edge of the pool were several warm waterfalls.

"Are you all right?" Byakuya asked.

"F-fine!" Toshiro managed.

"Is this room satisfactory?"

"Eh…we…I ah, noticed that there were bathrooms in some of the rooms," Toshiro said anxiously, "Why not just…?"

"That is obvious," Byakuya said off-handedly, "The larger chamber is more appropriate for shared bathing."

"Sh-shared bathing?"

"Well, the idea is to relax you so that our coitus will be more comfortable for you."

Toshiro flushed brightly.

"Do you have to just say it out loud like that?" he complained, "I mean, if you're trying to make me calmer, you're not doing a very good job!"

Byakuya stopped short of the near edge of the pool and looked back at Toshiro questioningly.

"My apologies," he said sincerely, "If it is too uncomfortable to be undressed with me just yet, we could bathe separately and meet in my chamber for the…"

Byakuya realized that Toshiro's flustered look was increasing and carefully stopped himself.

"For that which we must do."

"That's not much better," Toshiro said dryly.

"Sorry."

"It's fine."

Toshiro quivered for a moment, turning his head away as Torio's younger brother, a handsome, dark-haired, green-eyed youth named Kuchiki Akio, removed his yukata and set it aside, then undressed himself and stood, waiting patiently. Torio removed Byakuya's yukata and followed the clan leader out, across the waist deep pool and to one of the waterfalls.

 _Well, at least once we're in the water, there is some cover_ …

He cleared his throat nervously and started across the pool, noting out of the corner of one eye that Akio was following closely, wearing a calm, unaffected expression.

 _I guess I shouldn't be so uncomfortable being naked around others. Officers relax in the hot tubs naked sometimes. This isn't that different…except_...

_Except…we're going to be having sex after this. I wonder, even if this does work and I do start to feel more relaxed, won't I just tense up before we get back to Byakuya's bedroom? Maybe we should just get it over with._

_Are the servants going to watch us?_

_Oh my god_ …

Toshiro reached the waterfall next to Byakuya's and stood, letting the water rush down onto his slim, naked body while he watched Torio lather soap onto Byakuya's pale, perfect flesh as the two conversed quietly.

"Is the water warm enough?" Akio asked, making Toshiro startle.

"Oh, sorry, yes, it's f-fine," he answered awkwardly, "Just right."

"I am going to wash you now, if that's all right," Akio said, lathering up the soap on his hands.

Toshiro felt his blush returning.

_It'll be a month at least before my skin goes back to a normal color!_

"That's fine," he said, his teeth clenching at the words, "Thank you, Akio."

He took a steadying breath, trying to force his slightly shaking body into stillness, but flinching as Akio's warm, soapy hands began to massage the soap into his dampened skin.

 _Thank goodness for the depth of the water and the soap making it cloudy. This is so_ …

His thoughts derailed suddenly as Akio's fingers pushed into a tensed shoulder muscle, working at it gently, until it gradually relaxed. He pressed into another muscle and Toshiro loosed a soft groan of surrender and contentment, relaxing more. He closed his eyes as his attendant continued massaging his muscles until his eyes drifted shut and he half dozed, standing under the pounding water.

He heard Akio say something and managed to mumble a sleepy reply, but wasn't sure what he was acknowledging until it registered that the two attendants were walking back across the pool, where they dressed, then bowed and left the chamber. Toshiro swallowed hard, trying to keep his body calm as Byakuya left the waterfall he was under and waded to the one where he waited. They stood, facing each other and saying nothing for a moment. In the end, Byakuya was forced to break the odd silence, as Toshiro seemed incapable of finding the words.

"May I come closer to you?" he asked softly, his words almost drowned out by the sound of the falling water.

Toshiro shivered, even though the water was warm, and managed a short nod of assent. He forced himself to breathe slowly as Byakuya made his approach and moved in behind him, sliding slender arms around him and holding him gently. Petal soft lips touched the side of his throat and made a trail of wet kisses all of the way to his flushed earlobe. Byakuya's teeth caught the soft lobe and his pink tongue tickled it teasingly. A flustered breath escaped him, then a more urgent, wanton sound as Byakuya's hand caressed his soft belly for a while, then slid downward to curl around his prominent erection.

"Oh…" Toshiro panted softly.

The searching fingers of Byakuya's other hand slid across his breast, pausing to torment one pink, raised nipple, then the other. The noble's head bent, and his probing tongue treasured each erect nub until Toshiro's loins ached with arousal and he leaned heavily against Byakuya. Toshiro flinched as something hot, stiff and damp touched the small of his back and his anxieties started to make a swift return. Byakuya's deep, seductive voice spoke into his ear again and he could have melted into the water as the noble's hand continued to slide up and down the flushed shaft of his inflamed penis. Byakuya's fingers touched his inner thigh and he spread his legs wantonly to invite more erotic touches, moaning hungrily and eagerly reciprocating as the noble's voracious mouth fastened on his. He moaned into Byakuya's attacking mouth while the noble's insistent fingers invaded, the first sliding gently into his virgin entrance and slowing to stroke the tightened opening until the tense muscles relaxed.

"This is not painful, is it?" Byakuya asked softly.

"N-no, not painful," Toshiro panted.

He moaned more loudly as a second finger slid in to join the first inside him and Byakuya's hand moved more firmly, the fingers thrusting and probing deeply until the younger man's breaths shortened and his mind began to grow hazy and confused.

 _Is he going to take me here? Now?_ Toshiro wondered dizzily, _It seems like he_ …

"Does this feel good?" Byakuya whispered into his ear, tightening the pressure around his hardness and stroking firmly.

"O-oh! Gods, yes, it feels good!" he panted almost deliriously.

"I will enter you now, if you have no objection," the noble breathed.

Toshiro couldn't hold back a dazed laugh.

"You're asking permission?" he chuckled, "I already agreed to this."

Soft kisses made his throat blush again and his cheeks felt too warm as Byakuya cupped a palm around his face and kissed his lips very gently.

"I will always show perfect respect for you, Toshiro" he affirmed, "Always."

The white-haired taichou's legs went weak and he was sure he would collapse as Byakuya's hand ran slowly over his slick, wet bottom, curving around his thigh and lifting it so Toshiro could wrap it lightly around the noble's slim waist. Toshiro burrowed into Byakuya's warm, wet shoulder, biting down and closing his eyes as the noble began a slow, teasing entry.

_Hot! It's so hot! I feel like I'll melt!_

The slicked head of the noble's penis pushed gently inside and Byakuya paused, panting against the intensity of the sensation and causing a like reaction in his white-haired comrade.

_He's never done this?_

_He's being so gentle…so slow and methodical…so…perfect! I was sure it would hurt when he put it inside me, but it doesn't hurt at all!_

_Damn! I can barely breathe._

Toshiro felt the rough surface of the rock wall touch his back and his hips bucked in reaction, earning a lusty, aggressive moan from Byakuya as he gripped Toshiro's bottom tightly, pushing his full length inside, then quivering as he carefully waited for the younger taicho to adjust to his size. When he felt Toshiro's body relax, he began a series of increasingly insistent thrusts, teasing his comrade's erect nipples and kissing him passionately. Toshiro moaned loudly in response, arching his back and bucking his hips again, making Byakuya's body quiver as he tried to hold back so as not to become too rough with his equally inexperienced partner. But within scant moments, restraint became impossible, and the two thrust wildly against each other, exchanging hard, biting kisses.

Toshiro felt a shiver of anticipation as Byakuya made a deeper, more urgent sound in his throat, then his body shuddered warningly. Melting heat erupted all through Toshiro's insides, making him howl in surrender, and he released violently as the two men collapsed slowly to their knees and indulged in another, slower bout of heated kissing.

They sank down in the water, moving to the edge so that they could lie on their backs in the shallows, looking up through the glass ceiling at the lovely, star-filled sky. Toshiro felt like he should say something, but he hadn't a clue what would be proper. So, he burrowed into Byakuya's soft, warm shoulder and dozed peacefully.

"Do you feel warmer?" Toshiro asked sleepily, after a few awkward moments of consideration.

He snickered softly at his own words.

"I mean, do you think that our reiatsu blended enough so that you will be all right now?"

"It should have," Byakuya answered quietly, keeping his eyes carefully focused on the sky above them, "I feel fine now…quite warm, thank you, Toshiro."

"Good."

Toshiro felt a strange, somewhat sad little twinge at how Byakuya's hands continued to lightly touch and caress him, and the noble's dark eyes reflected a tenderness he was sure hadn't been there before.

 _Well, we did just give up our virginity to each other. I wonder how he feels about that. I don't know how to feel. I mean, we are attracted, but this wasn't about falling in love. It was about saving Byakuya's life. We don't have any agreements. I don't have a right to expect anything like this will ever happen again. It was strange and, at first, it was really awkward. But there's no denying that being with him like this was…nothing short of amazing, nothing less than beautiful_. 

_I wonder if he feels the same._

_Byakuya is a quiet, serious person, who lives by strict rules and conducts himself always in an honorable way. He doesn't say nearly as much as he thinks and he doesn't complain about the oddness or unfairness of things. He is a powerful man of high ranking, and he could have looked down on me. It wouldn't have been a surprise for a man of high status to do that. But there is so much more to Kuchiki Byakuya than that_!

"Toshiro…" Byakuya whispered, his voice catching.

The white-haired taichou wasn't sure just how they had started kissing again, or what made him turn and surge up, out of the water, then spread his thighs wide and wrap them around Byakuya's submerged torso.

"Ah, Toshiro!" Byakuya moaned, his hips pressing upward as the younger man's ground insistently against them, "You do not have to…"

"Please, Byakuya," he panted, blushing, "I want to!"

"I m-must confess I want this also."

The unsettled sound of the elder man's voice set off renewed vigor in Toshiro's erotic movements. He ground harder against Byakuya's trapped body, snapping at his lips furiously and panting with scathing desire as Byakuya's hands took hold of his hips, encouraging their hard, wild movements. Seething heat seemed to sear him all over and he didn't even worry about there being any pain as he shifted slightly and Byakuya's trembling hands positioned him so that the noble could enter him again. All he felt was the incredible urgency to sink down onto Byakuya's hot, swollen erection, and to be connected again, to feel that deep invasion of his core, to drive their bodies together forcefully and push them to the brink of wanton madness. The two men lost their inhibitions and any pretense of holding back as they finished with a flurry of wickedly sensuous thrusts, then surrendered together to the beautiful rush of heat that licked their flesh all over and left them shaking hard and holding tightly to each other, their eyes locked aggressively as they slowly worked to catch their breath.

Toshiro disentangled himself, looking away in sudden embarrassment as his eyes spotted a few cloudy tendrils of their spilled seed floating in the water, between his parted thighs. His throat tightened and he couldn't have thought of anything to say anyway. He could see that Byakuya was moving, sitting up next to him and he had no idea of what to day.

"That was lovely, Toshiro," Byakuya said softly, continuing to use the younger man's given name.

He laid a soft kiss on Toshiro's still trembling shoulder and slipped an arm around him.

"It was…unexpected and…I hope you are not regretful. I assure you that I am not. My apologies if I've made you feel uncomfortable. We can separate now, if you wish. Just, do not remove the protection charm for a few hours to ensure that there is no impregnation.

"Mmhmmm," Toshiro managed dazedly, his ears ringing loudly as he recovered, "Sure, okay."

He felt another twinge of embarrassment as Byakuya stood and helped him to his feet and he felt the telling trickle along his inner thighs. They waded back across the pool and exited, turning away from each other politely as they dressed, then starting out of the room and up the wooden walkway that ran outside the bedrooms of the main wing.

"You may return to your guest room," Byakuya said quietly, "or you are welcome to sleep next to me for the night. It is your decision. I have read that one's first coitus can cause inflamed emotions and an insatiable desire to curl around another warm body."

Toshiro couldn't hold back an amused smile.

"You've read that, huh?" he laughed softly, "Was it a reliable source?"

"I believe so."

"Ah, then…maybe we should not sleep alone."

He was sure he caught the beginnings of a smile at the edges of Byakuya's usually stern lips.

"As you wish, Toshiro."

The two quieted as they passed one of the rooms and Toshiro sensed two familiar reiatsus. Out of the corner of an eye, he caught sight of Kurosaki Ichigo's body wrapping warmly around Tetsuya's, and both young men smiling as they slept soundly.

 _Ichigo is intimate with…Tetsuya_?

"Ah," Byakuya said in a low, disapproving tone, "It seems that Ichigo has developed an interest in my cousin."

"Is that bad?" Toshiro asked.

Byakuya considered silently as they paused at the entrance to the master suite.

"Perhaps not. Ichigo is impulsive, but he is kind and, while spirited, he will be gentle with Tetsuya. My cousin had a difficult childhood. He grew up in a secret, illegal noble's prison, and he is somewhat innocent."

Toshiro glanced back in the direction of Tetsuya's bedroom and smiled.

"I don't think you need to worry. They seem happy."

"You look cheerful, yourself," Byakuya commented, "You must be glad that it is over and you do not have to be so intimate with me anymore."

"Byakuya…" Toshiro said uneasily, "don't think that…"

He was silenced as Byakuya's soft fingertips touched his lips.

"You needn't say any more. It is late and we are both still recovering from injury. Come, we can comfort each other here until morning."

"Y-yeah, sure," Toshiro answered, accepting the slender hand Byakuya offered and following him into the room.

_He's wrong. I don't feel relieved that it's over. It's like I touched something that felt like perfection and then had it taken away again._

_I wonder…is that how Byakuya feels too?_

He pondered the question as he laid down in the noble's bed and burrowed into the blankets, sighing sleepily as Byakuya's warm body curled around his and the noble laced their fingers together.

 _Yeah…I think it is_ …


	6. Separately Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Toshiro suffer the aftermath of their sexual joining.

The sound of birds chirping leaked down into Toshiro's sleeping mind and very slowly brought him back to wakefulness. His slender body was naked again and wrapped warmly in blankets. His heart ached a little at finding himself alone, but opening his eyes, he found that Byakuya was seated on the edge of the walkway, outside of the bedroom, and looking up into the blue sky. Still dressed in his sleeping yukata and the breeze moving its edges, he looked almost ethereal. His hair fluttered slightly and he breathed slowly as he relaxed in the cool morning sunshine.

 _I don't know what happened_.

_Neither one of us really decided to make love again. We fell asleep together, just holding each other and we only planned to comfort each other in the loneliness we thought we might feel after losing our virginity together. At first, we just slept. It was so warm and everything around us was soft and comfortable. My powers didn't even once cause me to become cold or to chill us while we slept. I thought at first that all of the warmth was coming from Byakuya, but I felt it inside me too._

Toshiro's face flashed with sudden heat.

 _I've never slept with someone's arms around me all night. I mean, I never had anyone who was more than a friend. I used to curl up with my grandma when I was very small, but then my powers started to freeze us. I've slept next to Momo when I was an older child, but I carefully put layers between us to protect her. And neither of us was interested in the other in any but a platonic way…much like siblings_.

_With Byakuya, everything was different. We slept for awhile, but when I woke in the middle of the night, he was kissing that place beneath my earlobe, then down the back of my neck. He looked embarrassed when he realized I was awake, so I kissed him to let him know it was okay with me._

_Byakuya seems so cool and distant all of the time, but most people don't know that his mouth is actually unexpectedly warm and sometimes hot when it touches someone else. I felt a little dizzy when he touched it to certain places…that place behind my ear, anywhere on my throat, the back of my shoulder and most especially on my lips. We were both suddenly smiling and neither one of us is known for doing that. But lips just smile while people kiss, I guess. I couldn't stop smiling when he kissed my lips. And they opened without me thinking that we were going to kiss more deeply. Then, I met his tongue. It's such an expressive thing, when you think about it. And to have his tongue, that is always hidden from everyone, that is closely guarded so it won't be offensive…to have it slide into my mouth and probe like it did…like he couldn't get enough of the taste of me, like he wanted to touch and caress every inch inside, like his hands were touching me on the outside. It made me want to stay that way all night, with our mouths open and tasting, exploring and appreciating what no one else even knows exists._

He felt himself hardening painfully at the memory of how that solemn mouth had pleasured him, sliding up and down his throbbing penis, licking the sensitive head, then engulfing and sliding down again, sucking almost painfully hard, but only making Toshiro want to be sucked harder.

_For just a little while, I stopped feeling lonely._

_It's not like I'm really alone, I suppose. Before the war destroyed our headquarters, the tenth was always pretty active, with Rangiku always talking too loud with someone and people coming in and out. Everyone greeted me and there was a never ending stream of requirements, orders, responsibilities. I was always doing something, so I didn't have time to get very bored…although Rangiku constantly complained she was whenever one person would leave and before the next sauntered in. Yes, it was an active and friendly place, but I almost felt invisible…like even all of the people who greeted me and carried on around me didn't really see me. And I didn't care at all about that._

_Never_.

_But when I woke last night and he was touching me so gently…not intrusively at all, but like he was just really enjoying that I was there and it made things better for him to have me there. I liked being there too. I liked having someone touch me in that quiet, appreciative way. He wasn't doing it to seduce me…although we did make love a lot of times last night. I guess it just felt good for both of us to escape our loneliness for awhile._

"Kuchiki taichou," Kisuke's voice said cordially from somewhere outside the open garden doors, "You are looking well this morning. How are you feeling?"

"I feel fine now," he heard Byakuya answer, "I believe that our coitus did, in fact, stabilize us. Toshiro also seemed comfortable. Our reiatsu is well balanced now."

"I can see that," the shopkeeper said with what seemed to Toshiro like a little touch of playfulness, "You used the protection charm, right?"

"We did."

"Well, I can't find a thing wrong with you," Kisuke said approvingly, "I can have a look at Toshiro if you want, to make sure."

"Toshiro is still sleeping," Byakuya replied quietly, "He was sleeping very deeply after our exertions."

"R-right."

_I can tell Kisuke is smirking. I hope Byakuya has the sense not to tell that man how many times we made love. There were the two times in the baths…then when I woke up and found him touching me like that…and I lost count of how many times after that, who started it each time and all of that. It went on until I felt so full, I finally fell asleep and didn't wake up again. I was so warm inside, like I'd never been in all of my life. But even after making love when we didn't have to anymore, neither of us said a word about it being unusual. We didn't talk much at all, except each of us wanted to be sure the other was comfortable._

_It was_.

 _If he came back now, I would let him inside me again. It doesn't feel strange anymore. It just feels soft and warm and so good that I wish it didn't have to end. I wish that it hadn't just been because my power was freezing him to death. I want it to be because we crave each other…because we can't imagine not being close that way…because we don't just cure each others' loneliness, we complete each other. Yeah, I want all of that and I already know it's impossible. That's why he's sitting where he is. He probably knew that if he stayed, we'd keep on waking up and making love, then falling asleep in each others' arms_.

_When I really think about it, it's almost like our bodies knew this would be the only time, so they clung to each other desperately, taking a lifetime of pleasures in just a few hours. Now, we just have to accept that it's over, and we have to go back to normal._

_If anything can be normal again, after what we've just been through._

"Well, just give me a yell if you or Toshiro have any further issues. I think you won't, but you know where to find me if you do."

"Thank you, Urahara Kisuke."

"Sure, no problem."

Toshiro listened to the shopkeeper's receding footsteps, then burrowed down in the blankets, feigning sleep as Byakuya rose and walked back inside, where he paused for a moment and Toshiro could feel the noble's dark, inquisitive eyes touching him. Byakuya took a deeper, more pronounced breath, then walked past the bed and into the dressing area. Toshiro heard Torio's footsteps and his cheerful greeting as he entered the room. He followed Byakuya into the dressing area and Toshiro heard the little rustles of sound as the attendant dressed the noble.

"You look well this morning," Torio said in a relieved tone, "I'm glad. I was worried about you."

"It seems that Urahara's plan was successful in balancing our reiatsu." Byakuya answered, "I was confident that it would. But…thank you."

"Would you like me to serve Hitsugaya taicho his breakfast in bed, sir? He seems exhausted."

"He was only recently healed, but had additional stresses put on his healing body. Do serve him something as soon as he wakes. And…make sure that you include amanatto. He mentioned that he enjoys them with his grandmother when he goes to visit her."

_I did?_

"I would also like you to have a new bed and bedding sent to her…anonymously. She is in the registry for West Rukongai District One."

"Hai."

"Have them ensure that any damage sustained in the war is seen to. There probably won't be any, as the Rukongai was not directly invaded, but Toshiro seemed like he might be worrying about her, and it will be a few days before he is strong enough to go and visit. She may also be anxious to know that he is all right."

"Of course."

A long moment of silence followed.

"That is a very kind gesture, sir," Torio commented.

Toshiro heard Byakuya give a dismissive exhale.

"It's nothing."

Toshiro felt an unscripted smile rise on his lips.

_He always does that…tries to play down what he does, to dismiss it as just what anyone would do out of politeness. But, Torio is right. It is a very kind gesture. He's probably feeling guilty for us having to have sex to keep him from freezing to death. How quickly he forgets that he wouldn't have been in that situation in the first place if he hadn't tried to protect my dignity by keeping me from falling. There's a lot to Byakuya that people miss._

_I've seen it._

_I've seen him show little signs of caring for Rukia and Renji. I've seen him wanting to break rules, but knowing he couldn't, like when Inoue Orihime was abducted and we were ordered back here and told not to interfere. He escorted them back to the Seireitei as ordered, but them he gave them those cloaks and let them go. He has also encouraged Kurosaki Ichigo to do things that he would have liked to do, but couldn't. And now, looking out for Grandma, because he knows that she's the only family I have._

He felt a little burning in the corners of his eyes and was about to rub them, but Byakuya's footsteps sounded and he emerged from the dressing room, pausing to glance at Toshiro, who made his breaths slow and relaxed and kept his eyes closed. Byakuya's footsteps sounded again and Toshiro waited until they faded away before sitting up and stretching, smiling as Torio appeared instantly, bearing a tray with his breakfast…and a serving of amanatto.

"Thanks," he said cordially, digging in to the food enthusiastically.

"Our healer will be in to examine you in a little while," Torio informed him.

"I'll want to bathe first," Toshiro said, blushing at the realization that his body was still sticky from the numerous couplings.

"Of course, sir," Torio said readily, "I can attend you if you want to use the bathing chamber."

"Oh," Toshiro said, blushing, "that's okay. I'll just use the shower in here, if that's all right."

"It's fine," Torio chuckled, "I could tell you're not used to having someone bathe you. I hope we didn't embarrass you last night. Byakuya-sama was trying to show you respect by having us assist you."

"I know. I appreciate that. But I can take care of myself this morning."

He glanced at the clock and made a sound of surprise.

"I should say this afternoon," he corrected himself, hurrying through the last few bites of his food, then handing his tray to the attendant.

"Would you like me to bring more for you, Hitsugaya taicho?" Torio asked.

"Ah, no, I'm okay. I'm just going to shower and change."

He frowned and looked down at himself.

"Although, I don't have anything. Even my things salvaged from the tenth aren't going to fit."

"Byakuya-sama anticipated that," Torio explained, "Our tailors have already made a new uniform for you, and a couple of things to relax in."

Toshiro let out a flustered breath and ran his fingers through his tousled hair.

"He didn't have to do that," he commented self-consciously.

"He did the same for the other officers staying here who needed uniforms repaired or remade. He said that it's important for the soldiers to see that the taichos have endured their challenges well and are ready to lead."

"Yeah, I guess that is pretty important. But, he still didn't have to do so much…though, it was kind of him."

Torio gave Toshiro an appraising look.

"He surprises people sometimes," the attendant commented, "but I have known and served Byakuya-sama for many years. He is careful to always appear dignified and sort of distant, but anyone who is around him for a while knows that he also has a kind, protective nature. He was always gentle with Hisana-sama and he seems to have the same intention about you."

"Well, he doesn't have to," Toshiro said dismissively, "I can take care of myself. N-not that it isn't appreciated…"

"I understand," Torio said good-naturedly, turning to exit the room, "I will be back with the healer when you are dressed."

"Thank you, Torio."

"You are welcome, sir."

Toshiro slipped his feet over the edge of the bed, yawning and stretching again. He stood and started towards the bathroom, only to suffer a wave of dizziness that made his vision oddly distorted and a sharp ringing begin in his ears. He turned back towards the bed, but the room had started to tilt strangely, and he couldn't seem to make his feet move. He felt his legs give way and he heard a loud crash as his limp body hit the floor. He was sure he heard Torio's garbled voice calling his name worriedly, then everything around him went mercifully black.

XXXXXXXXXX

"Where is Toshiro?" Byakuya asked stridently as he entered his bedroom and found Akio placing fresh bedding on the bed and fluffing the pillows in the clan leader's suite, "I heard that he collapsed and lost consciousness."

"Our healer is with him," Akio answered quickly, "and Torio hasn't left him for a minute, as you ordered, sir. They are in the bathing chamber. Michio felt that, for his dignity's sake it would be best to bathe him and set him in fresh bedding."

"Hmm."

Byakuya left the bedroom and flash stepped to the bathing chamber, where he found Michio in one of the shallow soaking areas, leaning over Toshiro's naked, floating body. Torio and Tetsuya knelt beside him on the other side, Tetsuya using his powers to allow the unconscious taicho to breathe under water and Torio carefully bathing him as the healer continued his examination.

"Is Toshiro all right?" Byakuya asked in a concerned tone, "I was told that he collapsed."

"He is fine," the old healer said reassuringly, "The boy has just been through a lot of physical punishment."

Tetsuya's breath caught slightly at the words and Torio bit his lip and looked away. Michio paused, rethinking and quietly corrected himself.

"What with the war…" he added, trailing off, "Anyway, he will be fine with some uninterrupted rest. I've given him a good start with a long infusion and a dreamless sleep kido. He should be quite refreshed when he wakes."

"That is a relief," Byakuya replied, his eyes remaining fixed on Toshiro's floating body, "Make sure that he is kept comfortable."

Byakuya started to turn away.

"Ah, Byakuya-sama," Torio said tentatively.

The clan leader glanced back over his shoulder.

"I was wondering, when we are finished here, where should we take Hitsugaya taicho?"

Byakuya remained frozen for a moment.

_It wouldn't be right to have him placed in my room now. We have done as we agreed and I have no right to place additional expectations on him, just because my heart is lonely. We gave each other comfort after a difficult time, but now we need to try to begin feeling normal again._

_I do not want him to be burdened, feeling that he has to comfort me further. I am accustomed to being alone. I will give him respectful space and make sure that he is constantly attended._

_My continued presence might put unfair pressure on him._

"Byakuya-sama?"

"Place him in his guest room and see that he is not left alone. The moment he wakes, be sure that he is fed and updated on all of the notes from the latest taicho's meetings.

_This should restore for him the feeling of being more normal…if normal is something that we will ever have after the war and its fallout. We must take small steps to repair what damage was done and to rebuild our homes…ourselves. I only hope that when we do, it can at least be something like it was before. I know it will never be the same. We lost our innocence in this war…that feeling that we could overcome anything that we faced. Our flaws and our weaknesses were exposed, and our enemies took great pleasure in attacking, not just our bodies, but our dignity. As Nodt with the way he carefully eviscerated me…Bazzard Black, Cang Du and Giselle, with the way each cut Toshiro and took advantage of his youth, his impulsiveness, his concern for his subordinates and his devotion to protecting Soul Society. This war broke us in many ways. It will be a long, slow recovery._

_But we are the taichos of Soul Society._

_Our strength and our resilience is why we were chosen._

_It is why we will survive._

_And it is why we will learn to thrive again._

Byakuya walked back to his bedroom and sat down on the side of the bed that Toshiro had occupied during the prior night. One slender hand came to rest on the freshly laid coverlet and he breathed slowly to make himself calm inside again.

_We will forget._

_With time, it will fade._

_We will feel normal again._

Something glinted in the wastebasket and Byakuya frowned and retrieved the protection charm Toshiro had worn during their coupling. He studied the glass, cracked, he gathered, when the young man fell, and he started to drop it back in the wastebasket. But at the last moment, his hand trembled slightly and closed around it again. He wrapped it carefully in a length of silk and slipped it into his dresser. He glanced back at the bed a final time, his cheeks flushing at the memory of how long it had taken for them to sate themselves.

 _We were very lonely, it seems. And when we were freed to escape that loneliness, we embraced the closeness readily. But holding on too tightly would be wrong. He may have been infatuated with me, but Toshiro is innocent about love. If we are meant to be more, then we have to trust that it will happen…but on its own terms, not by being forced through necessity. Love can't be made from the outside. It must come from the heart. I could love Toshiro, but if he does not return that love wholeheartedly…it would only be setting both of us up for heartbreak_. 

_So, I will step back._

_I will give him time._

_I will be patient._

Byakuya sighed softly.

 _I hope he will not misunderstand_.


	7. Loneliness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Toshiro struggle to move past the war and its fallout.

Byakuya heard a soft footstep at the entry to his study and looked up as Tetsuya entered the chamber with Ichigo at his side. He looked up at the two curiously, noting the flush on his cousin's cheeks and throat and the fact that the two were holding hands.

"Please excuse us if we are disturbing you," Tetsuya apologized.

"You are welcome. Come in," he invited the two, continuing to work quietly at the paperwork in front of him as the two knelt on the other side of the low table, "What brings you?"

"W-well," Tetsuya stammered, his blush brightening, "it seems that…I mean…"

Byakuya looked up from his work.

"You look flustered," he commented, glancing over his shoulder at his attendant, "Torio, please bring tea."

"Hai," Torio said, bowing before respectfully before exiting the room.

"Has Ichigo been fully healed?" Byakuya asked, looking back at Tetsuya.

"Yes, Byakuya-sama," his cousin answered, "Michio healed the worst and I restored his reiatsu and…"

Tetsuya paused for a moment, biting at his lip gently.

"I…made sure that he rested comfortably," he finished.

A little smirk touched Ichigo's lips, but quickly disappeared at the look Byakuya gave him.

"I am aware," Byakuya replied in an even tone, "You seem very relaxed with each other."

"That's kinda why we're here," Ichigo said, smiling and squeezing Tetsuya's hand, "I know you've been told about my father being Shiba Isshin."

"Yes, I did hear that," Byakuya commented in a cool tone, "It…actually made sense of a few things."

"R-right," Ichigo chuckled, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck, "Dad told me he used to get on your nerves sometimes."

"On occasion."

"Then, you and I have something in common," Ichigo said, nodding, "He gets on my nerves too. Especially in taking so many years before ever telling me about my own mom. Just so you know, I was as surprised as everyone else."

"I am sure that is true," Byakuya sighed, setting down his brush and resting his chin on his palm, "I am also sure that you came here with more to do than to exchange pleasantries and talk about your father's…idiosyncracies."

"I came here because, you know, since it's official that I am a Shiba, the family is planning to make me the new heir."

"That is not surprising, considering your capability and the fact that you have repeatedly saved Soul Society. I was expecting such would happen. And, I assume that your visit here alongside my cousin has to do with that?"

Tetsuya's head bowed and his flush deepened. Noting his discomfort, Ichigo continued.

"Byakuya, Tetsuya and I have only just met…"

"I know. But for two people who have just met, you seem very…comfortable with each other."

"We are," Ichigo confirmed, "I think that your cousin is amazing. He's smart and kind to everyone, and my clan is pretty impressed with how he planned and carried out your family's evacuation and protection during the war."

"Yes, Tetsuya will be receiving our clan's highest decoration for that."

Byakuya gave Tetsuya a look of approval.

"It is well deserved."

"Thank you, Byakuya-sama."

"I know that you and Tetsuya are really close. He told me how you rescued him from the noble's prison, and how you mentored him to make him comfortable in the family and to grow his powers. Because of that, I think it's only respectful that I should come and ask you personally. I would like to court Tetsuya…officially."

Byakuya straightened, studying Ichigo's unusually calm demeanor and his cousin's hopeful expression.

"You wish to court Tetsuya?" Byakuya mused, "I suppose that it would be the proper thing to do, given that you were seen sleeping in Tetsuya's bed."

"Yeah," Ichigo said, smiling sheepishly, "Sorry about that. I overextended myself and he was just restoring my reiatsu. We got to talking about his past and about the living world. We just kinda drifted off. I hope you aren't mad. Tetsuya didn't do anything wrong."

"No. He is an adult, and, although it was improper, you were in a private area of the estate, where only attendants and close family and friends would have seen in the garden doors."

"Well, the thing is, I know that all of the clans are going to be pressuring members of child bearing age to get married."

"I was not sure they would have broached that subject with you yet, given that you have only just come of age and are being thrust into noble life very quickly."

"That's right," Ichigo agreed, "And because of that, I'm going to need someone to help me settle in, so that I uh, don't look awkward. It needs to be someone who I can get along with, and someone who understands what it's like to have this happen. After all, Tetsuya was young when he was brought into the family."

"He was. And your argument does make sense. I will also inform you that the elders have already had several requests for Tetsuya's hand."

Tetsuya's breath caught in surprise.

"You have?" he asked, paling slightly.

"You know that I would not allow anyone to force you into a marriage, not after what you suffered, some of it being at the hands of our own family members. But, Tetsuya, are you sure that this is what you want?" Byakuya asked, "You are aware that being betrothed to an heir, and to the savior of Soul Society is going to put you on public display. And while I am sure that you will handle such with proper poise, are sure that is all right with you?"

"I am a little nervous," Tetsuya admitted, glancing at Ichigo and smiling shyly, "but, I feel close to Ichigo already. He is kind and funny, and he can't wait to show me what he enjoys most about the living world."

"I want Tetsuya to come back with me to get to know my dad and my sisters. I'd like to show him around Karakura Town, where I grew up. I know he has responsibilities here, but it's been pretty quiet for the past few days, and with all of the taichos here, no one's going to mess with the estate, right?"

"I imagine not."

"Then," Ichigo prompted him, "it's…?"

"I will expect an official proposal, delivered from your elders to ours, making the announcement. As the Seireitei is still recovering, we may not be able to set a wedding date yet."

"We're okay with that," Ichigo chuckled, "We're not in that much of a hurry. We just met, so we want time to get to know everything about each other. Thanks, Byakuya."

He turned and kissed Tetsuya on the cheek.

"I'll go and tell my family now. I'll be back later."

He escaped out the door, leaving Tetsuya alone with Byakuya as the tea arrived. Torio looked around questioningly.

"W-weren't there three of you?" he inquired.

"Ichigo had business to attend to, but Tetsuya and I will take our tea together."

"Of course, Byakuya-sama," Torio said, moving to serve the tea.

"You look relieved," Byakuya commented, taking a sip of his tea, "You must have known that I would support your decision."

"I thought that you would," Tetsuya admitted, "but I know Ichigo annoys you sometimes. Still, he is a wonderful person. He is loyal and protective."

"Yes, he is a good friend, and that is where a proper relationship should begin. I am sure that you and Ichigo will be happy together. I am glad that you are interested in seeing someone again. It has been a long time for you."

"Yes," Tetsuya agreed, "but I feel like Ichigo is the right person for me."

He paused, gathering his thoughts for a moment.

"Now that we are alone," Tetsuya went on, "I will confess that I have been noticing that someone has had your attention too."

Byakuya stiffened slightly.

"It was an unusual situation," he said, frowning, "That has been resolved and I believe that will be the end of things."

"Will it?" Tetsuya asked, tilting his head and studying his more solemn cousin's face closely, "Byakuya-sama, I know it was a strange situation, but I have been noticing things, just little things, that make me think that you might not want that situation to end."

Byakuya cleared his throat softly. Tetsuya sensed he was about to object and hastened to stop him.

"Please, just hear me out," he said softly, "I, of all people, know that it would cause some trouble in the family."

"Even if it did not, given the awkward way it would seem after what just happened. I do not want to create waves in the family. You remember how some of the elders reacted when I married Hisana."

"But that was some time ago, and things have changed," Tetsuya insisted, "You know it wasn't long ago that I would not have been considered suitable to marry an heir, or to marry at all! This is the kind of change that you and I used to speak of when we would rest in the meadow together, after our training. Byakuya-sama, we have just been through a terrible conflict, and during that time, it stopped mattering so much who was a commoner and who was a noble. For that time, we were all just comrades, fighting together to protect our homes and loved ones. I think that if there is a time in which such a thing would be accepted, now is the time."

Byakuya considered silently for several moments, sipping at his tea, before answering.

"And, what if this is not what Toshiro wants?"

"Then, maybe you will just go on, being comrades and friends. But, if you are beginning to love him…"

"Tetsuya…"

"If you are," Tetsuya pressed on, laying a hand on his cousin's, "Byakuya-sama, you should say something to him. You should say something to him now."

"I do not think this is the time."

"Then, when will the right time be?" Tetsuya asked pointedly, "Will it be in the next few weeks, when our elders are trying to match you up with a new bride? You know that is exactly what they are going to do. All of us who are strong, respected and of child-bearing age are going to be arranged to marry. You confided in me that you thought being forced to marry someone you don't love would be a terrible burden, for you and for that partner. If you love this man, then you should tell him."

"And what makes you so sure that I am in love, or even falling in love with Toshiro?"

Tetsuya smiled sadly.

"The little signs are everywhere, _watashi no itoko_. It is in your eyes when you look at him. It is in your hands when you touch him. I have watched you taking care of him, and I am reminded of how you were with Hisana-sama. It is not an insult to her if you are falling in love again. Hisana-sama wanted you to be happy again. She…while she was ill, she asked me to look after, not just your physical well-being, but your heart. She said that she was sure there would come a time after she was gone that someone else would touch your heart, and she knew that losing her would make you afraid to love again. I told her it was true, that losing the one you love puts a great fear in your heart. I know. I have also lost someone who I loved. I also mourned for many years, and when Ichigo began to touch my heart, I was afraid. I still am afraid, but I know Naoki would be happy to know I found someone who loves me, and who I can love too. Please, just consider before you close this pathway."

Byakuya looked quietly at Tetsuya and gave no answer for a moment. The two drank the last of their tea and Tetsuya stood to take his leave.

"I am to report to you that Hitsugaya taicho left this morning to return to his division to oversee repairs."

"Toshiro left?" Byakuya asked, "But, he was not cleared to go. He had several days more that he was supposed to rest."

"I was the one he told that he was going. Byakuya-sama, there was a sadness in his eyes."

"We were obligated to do something that we normally would not have, something that has caused him confusion. That is all."

"Are you sure?"

"I am sure that the situation will resolve itself," Byakuya said calmly, meeting Tetsuya's eyes meaningfully, "but perhaps it would be prudent to make sure that a healer goes to see him at his division to continue his care. Michio is busy here, but…"

"I will see to it personally," Tetsuya assured him.

"I thought you were going to Karakura Town."

"Oh, well Ichigo is going to take several days, at least, working out the details before we can leave. I will be happy to check in on Hitsugaya taicho and make sure he is kept well."

"And you will say nothing of our conversation," Byakuya added.

"Of course not," Tetsuya assured him.

Tetsuya turned to go, then paused and looked back over his shoulder as Byakuya spoke again.

"Thank you, Tetsuya…for your concern and for your assistance."

"I am grateful to you," Tetsuya answered, "and I would like to see you happy again."

"And someday, perhaps I will be."

XXXXXXXXXX

Rangiku scowled and covered her ears as she followed Toshiro through the front doors of the partially rebuilt tenth division headquarters.

"Ugh, why did we have to come back here now?" she complained over the sounds of sawing and hammering, "We had several more days before they were going to be done, and you weren't even given your medical clearance to come back to work! Where are we going to sleep?"

"The new barracks is done," Toshiro shouted back to her.

"The barracks? You want us to sleep in the barracks with everyone?" she objected, "But, Kuchiki taicho invited us all to stay at his retreat as long as we wanted! We could work here in the daytime and go there at night, at least, couldn't we?"

Toshiro huffed out a dismissive breath.

"You do what you want," he said shortly, "Just get your work here done before you go off and spend all night gossiping and enjoying Byakuya's wine cellar!"

"That's not nice, Taicho."

"I'm not trying to be nice to you!" Toshiro snapped, wincing as a twinge went through his belly and he felt a creeping nausea coming on, "There are reports to be written and we need to restart soldier training. When everyone else returns, we need to have our division up and running."

"But half our officers are still recovering."

"We're lucky that they are still alive," Toshiro sighed, "but we can't wait for them to return. The Seireitei needs at least one division to be mostly operational, and I want that division to be ours. So, don't argue. There are a couple of desks set up in the barracks. I'm going to get something to eat and then I will be in to help you."

Rangiku frowned.

"But, you just ate before we left, didn't you?"

"Yes," Toshiro admitted, "But I am healing from serious wounds and use of my bankai for an extended period. Maybe you should eat more also. You were pushed pretty hard when the debris started coming down from the royal realm at the end of the battle."

"Heineko and I are a little tired still," Rangiku said, "But I'm not hungry. I am a little thirsty."

"Don't start with me, Rangiku," Toshiro warned her.

"Hey, you're old enough to drink now."

"I've been old enough to drink for years!" Toshiro yelled, "I just don't, because, first, I have things to do and second, I don't know how you can drink that stuff. It is nasty and it makes you behave like an idiot!"

"At least I don't behave like a child having a tantrum every time we disagree."

"Would you shut up and get to work?

"I'm going, I'm going," Rangiku sighed, rolling her eyes, "But after work, I am going back to Sakura no Kaiyo to sleep. Kuchiki taicho's beds are so soft and everything smells so good there. If I were you, I'd want to stay there for every minute I could, not lie on cots in the barracks. I don't know what's gotten into you."

"I just think that we've inconvenienced Byakuya enough," Toshiro said wearily, "If we are well enough, we should stop depending on him."

"Do you know what I think?" Rangiku asked, giving him a look that made him feel suddenly transparent.

"No, but I'm sure I'll hear it anyway," he said saucily.

"I think that Kuchiki Byakuya made an impression on you," Rangiku said accusingly, "They may have tried to keep things quiet…"

"But you found out anyway, didn't you?" Toshiro said, scowling, "It's not your business, so don't say any more about it!"

"But it was so sweet how he was injured, trying to help you."

"Who told you that? Did that bastard, Kenpachi…?"

"And it's so crazy that the only way to keep him from freezing to death was to…"

"Stop!" Toshiro yelled, covering his ears, "I can't believe someone told you this. You are the last person I would want to know. Now, the three worlds will know! You won't stop until it's in all of the papers and on the evening news! Well, I'm telling you right now, I don't want you to say another word about it. It's no one's business about the healing we had to do."

"The healing…" Rangiku said, crossing her arms.

"That's all it was," Toshiro said firmly, "He was injured by my bankai and we made sure that it didn't kill him."

"And you think that, after your first time, you can walk away and not feel anything?"

"Rangiku, so help me…"

"Okay, you win," Rangiku said, putting up her hands defensively, "I won't say another word…except…You two would be adorable together!"

"RANGIKU!"


	8. The World we Knew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Toshiro begin to realize that letting go may not be possible for them.

Toshiro left the partially restored tenth division walking slowly, a touch of annoyance nagging at him that he was walking with a slight limp and ached all over, even though he hadn't done anything to put stress on his body. He focused on the area around him, well aware that, although the last desperation attacks by small groups of quincies was tapering off, there were still incidences.

_And I wouldn't be able to fight off much more than their rank and file soldiers the way I feel. I just wish this stupid nausea would go away. I can stand some aches and pain, but I hate feeling like I need to throw up all of the time._

He remembered suddenly the sprig of fresh peppermint that Byakuya's cousin had given him upon dropping by that morning.

_Byakuya didn't need to still be worried about me. I am healing fine now and I just need to get back to something that feels like normal. But it was nice of him to send Tetsuya to follow up on my care. The fourth is still overwhelmed keeping up with treating the badly injured. And Tetsuya is very polite and non-intrusive. He's close to Byakuya. I was wondering if he would say anything about what happened at Sakura no Kaiyo, but he was careful to avoid saying anything overt. He did mention that Byakuya was surprised that I left. I hope he didn't think that I was escaping._

_I mean, maybe I was escaping, but it wasn't because I didn't feel like letting him make love to me again. I would have let it go on forever, but I think we both knew it wouldn't be right. It was all just a situation that went out of control for awhile, but it's okay now. Byakuya is no longer in peril and there's no need for us to carry on like we were._

_We have to move on and forget now._

The thought left an ache in his chest as he remembered how good it felt to be held close, to be kissed and touched so gently and to feel so connected to another person, in a way he never had before.

 _And besides, Rangiku thinks we would be adorable together_ , he mused, smirking and shaking his head.

He brushed off his heavier thoughts, breathing more deeply and slowly as he passed through the broken west gates of the Seireitei, waving to the guards and continuing into the Rukongai. His feet stopped as he approached the first west district and found it wholly untouched.

 _It's so strange_ , he thought, his eyes taking in the calm, quiet streets and normal looking buildings, _the way the Seireitei is so destroyed. But to Ywach, all of the people here were just souls who couldn't oppose him. They would have been easy prey for him, once their protectors in the Seireitei were gone. Still, it was in his nature to be heartless. I'm sure he had wicked plans for all of them, plans that he would have begun after he had seen to us. We are lucky to have won. We're broken and it will be a long time before everything is fixed, but we'll all be okay_.

His mind drifted back to the secret meeting that had taken place earlier that morning, and the captain commander's order that certain information not be repeated to anyone lower than fukutaicho status.

"I think it's important that you all know the truth of the situation in the royal realm," Shunsui said quietly, "Squad Zero reported back to us that they have found a way to keep the balance. I've gotta warn you, this news may be a little unpleasant. It turns out that there is still a huge amount of reiatsu radiating in Ywach's dead body, and Squad Zero has managed to harness that power, so that it can be used to sustain the balances we need."

Toshiro felt a little shiver at the memory.

_I suppose it's an appropriate fate, considering what he tried to do to us. It's ironic. He wanted the throne and now he has it, but he paid with his life. Now, instead of sitting there and devouring our souls at his leisure, he's sitting there and being slowly depleted over what will probably be thousands of years._

_I just have a creepy feeling inside._

_I know he is dead, but a part of me is a little scared he'll suddenly wake up and really be alive. I know he's dead. It's been confirmed, but still…_

Toshiro forced the darker thoughts away and turned his attention back to the very normal looking streets of the upper Seireitei.

_Although we were on the poor side, the upper Rukongai is pretty nice._

He turned a corner and found himself on his grandmother's street. His footsteps slowed and came to a standstill as he arrived at his grandmother's home and found the outside neatly touched up and a fresh herb garden planted. He spotted two women in the garden and hastened to join them. The elder of the two burst into a pleased smile at seeing him.

"Toshiro!" the old woman exclaimed, "Kami be blessed, you are all right!"

She hugged him with surprisingly strong arms and kissed him on the cheek, blinking in surprise at his added height.

"Why, you've grown since I last saw you. What happened, my boy?"

"Eh, well, a little side effect from my powers," Toshiro confessed, hugging her back, "It seems that I can't revert to being little anymore. I suppose that means I finally have to grow up and be an adult."

"Pity," the old woman joked, "I suppose that means that I will have to grow up too."

"Grandma," Toshiro chuckled, the weight on his heart easing slightly at being with the last remnant of his family once more.

"Here, I have something for you," the old woman said, pulling a handful of amanatto from her yukata and offering it to him, "You look starved."

She seemed to suddenly realize that she had forgotten something.

"Oh, Toshiro, this is Chinami. She was sent by a noble group that sponsors assistance for older citizens living alone. She takes care of me and keeps me company."

"I'm pleased to meet you, Hitsugaya taicho," the younger woman greeted him, bowing her head respectfully, "It is a pleasure serving your grandmother."

"We have a lot of fun together. Poor Chinami has just lost her husband in the war, and she needed employment to keep things up for their daughter, who is in a nearby boarding school. She comes here on weekends. I just let her use your old room. But Chinami and I are already like longtime friends."

"That's good," Toshiro said, studying the younger woman for a moment.

 _She looks a little familiar_ …

"My husband was a member of Squad Six," Chinami explained, "He was seventh seat."

"Ah, so I have seen you at some events with him, no doubt," Toshiro realized.

"On occasion," Chinami answered, nodding, "Our daughter and I were so proud of him. He was very talented."

"I'm so sorry that you lost him," Toshiro said sincerely, taking the woman's hand for a moment, then releasing it, "We lost many talented members of our military."

"We were shocked and it is hard for us to cope," Chinami went on, "but Kuchiki taicho has been wonderful to the families of the fallen. Squad Six sent grief counselors and people to help us sort of stay afloat. That is how I found this opportunity."

"I see."

_Byakuya again…but then, I saw that caring side of him quite a lot in the last few days, didn't I?_

"Did you see the house?" Toshiro's grandmother asked suddenly, bringing him out of his thoughts, "They fixed up all of those things that I'd been meaning to have fixed, and Chinami and I make sure now that the refrigerator is full."

"It sounds like she takes good care of you," Toshiro said, smiling at the younger woman, "Thank you for that. I feel bad that I can't come and visit her more often. I'm glad she has you."

He followed the two women inside, where the three of them washed up and sat down to tea that Chinami served. Toshiro's mouth watered as his grandmother's caretaker also served sweet, warm muffins and a small plate of other snacks.

"This is great!" Toshiro said, digging in hungrily, "I didn't realize that I was hungry, but I'm really starved."

"There is plenty more where that came from," his grandmother chuckled, "Chinami will bring more if you are still hungry."

And it seemed like, no matter how much he ate, he couldn't get enough. He had gone through several more servings of sweets and tea, before a contented burp escaped him and he sat back, yawning and stretching.

"You finally seem more like yourself again," his grandmother said in a relieved tone, "I was worried when you arrived because you looked so pale and thin. I know you went through a lot in the war. Wars are terrible things, and there are hurts that have to mend over years and years after, but you are a young man, Toshiro. You will be all right."

"I will be fine," Toshiro assured her, squeezing her hands and kissing her on the cheek, "I promise. I have to go back now, Grandma. There's still a lot of cleaning up to do. Although the enemy didn't come out here, thank goodness, the Seireitei is a real mess."

"You go on along, then," the old woman urged him, "I'm happy you came to see me. Come back soon."

"I will. And thank you, Chinami, for taking care of Grandma for me."

"You are very welcome, Hitsugaya taicho," the younger woman answered, bowing respectfully.

Toshiro started back along the even quieter streets, enjoying the warmth of the late afternoon sun, the scents of the flowers and grass, and the feeling of ease in being somewhere left untouched by the war.

_I needed this. I needed to come out here and get away from everything. I feel a little giddy, maybe from being happy again for awhile after being so destroyed by everything. I'll be more ready to handle things when I get back to the office._

He quickened his step, brushing off the little feeling of slight dizziness and focusing on his plans for once he arrived back at work.

_But, I should stop by and thank Byakuya. I know he was behind Chinami's becoming my grandma's attendant, as well as all of the repairs._

_And the amanatto._

_His Sakura no Kaiyo is on the way anyhow, he reasoned, It's appropriate to thank him and it's not out of the way._

He was surprised at needing to stop more than once to empty his bladder, but brushed it off as being because of all of the tea he had enjoyed at his grandmother's house. A little of his depression returned as he re-entered the damaged Seireitei, but somehow, the thought of seeing Byakuya buoyed him. He reached the retreat and was motioned past the guards.

"Welcome back, Hitsugaya taicho," the old housekeeper greeted him, "Will you be staying tonight? You are invited to dinner, and you have a standing invitation to rest here at will."

"I will stay for dinner," Toshiro answered, blushing as his only recently sated stomach growled scandalously, "I'm not sure about after."

"Of course, sir. If you decide to stay, the room that you used before is all made up."

"Thank you, Matsuko-san."

"It's our pleasure," the old woman assured him.

Toshiro left the entry and headed out onto the wooden walkway that ran along the main wing. He paused, just short of Byakuya's study, hearing voices emanating from the room.

"I am sorry, my boy," said an elderly male voice Toshiro recognized as Kuchiki Nori, the head of the family elders, "I know that it is sudden, considering that you have just recently returned, but it was high on a list of council priorities. You must understand the seriousness of what happened. The council was stunned when we thought you were lost in the war. We are most concerned, of course, with your welfare, but it is also our job to do what is best for the family."

"I understand," Byakuya answered quietly, "and I am not angry with the council for doing its job. I simply cannot take attention from everything else that is going on to see to a wedding now."

"The council foresaw that," Nori informed him, "and they have decided that you may wed informally now and just have a more formal reception when things are better. I know it is rushing you…"

"Yes, well, we both know why the council feels the need to rush," Byakuya reasoned, "I assume they have assembled a list of potential partners?"

"Yes."

Both men went silent for a moment, then Nori's voice sounded.

"What are you thinking, my boy?"

There was a longer pause before Byakuya answered.

"I do not know…"

"You sound as though there is a complicating factor," Nori suggested.

"Yes."

"Can you tell me what that is?" asked the elder.

"I am in love with someone."

Another long pause opened up.

"And you think this person would be judged unsuitable by the council?"

Byakuya sighed.

"I am not sure how they will react. He is a peasant, but he is also a war hero, who fought alongside me. Still, he is younger and I do not think he is, in any way, ready to become a noble spouse. That is far too much to ask of him. We do have a powerful resonance, so maybe the council could be convinced."

"But?"

"But, as I said, I do not think this person is ready for such pressure to be placed on him. If we are to be together, then we need time to explore our connection, and to see what that yields."

"Byakuya, you know that the council wants what is best for you, and for all of us," Nori assured him, "It would be their hope that you would find someone on your own who would meet with their expectations, but that was before the war. Do you have any idea the chaos that ensued when we felt your reiatsu fading? We were almost desperate, and we realized that there is no one right now, who the council would prefer to support if we lost you. We need, not to just have your strength, we need the promise of future strength to settle things. I don't want to put pressure on you."

"I know. You are only relaying council concerns, and I will not even argue that they should not be concerned. I just ask for a little bit of patience while things are still in disarray. The manor is almost ready for us to move back in and the fourth division is near completion, so the forces residing in my home will soon be relocated. Could we not wait at least that long to discuss this?"

The two suffered another long pause.

"I think I can convince them of that," Nori answered finally, "But once that time arrives, we will need to talk seriously on the matter. Our clan sits at the top of the hierarchy for now. But a lot of leaderships are about to change, and there will be heavy restructuring. We want to lead in that, just as we have led in all other things."

"And we will," Byakuya promised, "Whatever happens, our clan will be a proper example for all of the clans. I assure you of that."

"I believe you," Nori replied softly, "I just don't know if your relationship with your fellow taicho will fit well with that. Far be it from me to tell you what to do. I know Ginrei-dono would have argued on your behalf. I want you to be happy, just as much as my cousin did. But there is a lot at stake right now. I don't know if we can enjoy certain indulgences."

"Is that what you think Toshiro is?" Byakuya said, surprising Toshiro with both the direct use of his name, as well as the emotion behind it, "An indulgence? Do you know what we have endured in the past weeks? In even the past few days? This is not something that can be forced. I will not ask it of him, and you should not ask it of me!"

"I agree," Nori said reassuringly, "and I will do my best to stall the council. Just please, be careful not to anger them too much. We have all been through great strife and we are all suffering our losses. We must work together to rebuild things…and that may mean that you will have to marry out of duty, rather than for love. That has always been a possibility."

"Yes. And, I may have to accept it. I know."

"Why don't I leave you now to think about it?"

"Thank you. I will give the matter proper reflection."

Toshiro ducked into an empty sitting room as Nori left the study. He bit his lip gently, waiting several minutes before approaching the study, himself. He found Byakuya kneeling at the low table in the room, silently poring over a number of documents. He looked up, and Toshiro saw instantly the slight brightening of his features as their eyes met.

_He's happy to see me. He isn't a person who smiles a lot, but even without smiling, his face…his eyes convey his feelings, if you know to look closely._

"Toshiro," Byakuya greeted him in a polite, formal tone, "is there word from the captain commander?"

"Ah, no," Toshiro answered, "I, uh, just returned from the Rukongai. I wanted to thank you for having Chinami sent to live with my grandmother. I'd been thinking she needed someone to help out. Chinami is everything I would have looked for."

"I am glad that you find her acceptable," Byakuya said approvingly.

"You didn't have to do that."

"I wanted to."

"Yes, well, thank you."

"You are welcome."

Toshiro nodded and started to turn away.

"Toshiro?"

Toshiro paused, glancing back over his shoulder.

"Are you feeling better?"

"Yeah, I am," he assured the noble, "I've been getting rest and Grandma made sure that I ate plenty when I saw her today."

"Would you like to stay for dinner?"

Toshiro smiled.

"I already accepted Matsuko's invitation," he answered.

"Good. I will see you at dinner, then."

 _Not a word_.

_He is killing himself, desiring me, but he won't say a word that could put pressure on me. He is so protective._

Tetsuya's words came back to him in a flood of emotion.

"… _like he was with Hisana-sama_."

Byakuya's words to the elder spun together with Tetsuya's, turning Toshiro's mind into a dizzying swirl that somehow ended with him having crossed the room without knowing, and engaging Byakuya's surprised lips in a powerful kiss. He suffered an unspeakable moment of uncertainty as Byakuya stiffened. A moment later, the feeling left him as Byakuya lunged forward, and the two men tore each other's clothing away and fell down on the study floor, joining their bodies roughly and writhing together in an unscripted explosion of unrestrained passion. Toshiro gained the upper position and held tightly to Byakuya's shoulders, riding out each hard, grinding thrust and reeling at the equally desperate movements his usually less expressive comrade was making.

_This is crazy. We can't be doing this. We can't really be making love like this again. Why did I…?_

His pleasure peaked, and his breath left him as he felt Byakuya suddenly pull away from him. Toshiro curled up instinctively, panting hard as his body shuddered in completion. He couldn't risk meeting the other man's eyes, so he closed his own tightly.

"I am sorry," Byakuya apologized.

"What?" Toshiro mused, opening his eyes and sitting up, his hands scrabbling to find something to cover himself with, "You didn't do anything wrong. I threw myself at you. I'm the one who should be apologizing. It was…really reckless and it was wrong."

Byakuya bit his lip gently, holding back a little smile.

"I was not apologizing for making love to you so suddenly," he explained, "I withdrew because we were not wearing a protection charm. I could have made you pregnant if I ejaculated inside of you, so I pulled away at the last moment."

Relief flooded Toshiro's insides and he fell into Byakuya's arms for another bout of hard, hungry kisses.

"Oh," he sighed shakily, "Right. I forgot."


	9. Ice and Steel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya delivers stunning news to Toshiro.

Toshiro came out of what felt like a drunken stupor and found himself lying naked on his back in Byakuya's bed, with his thighs spread wide and Byakuya's lovely, radiant form bowed between them. Soft sweeps of his lover's pink tongue teased his already wet entrance. Heat flashed on his face and he moaned loudly, arching his back, offering himself for an even deeper exploration. Long, graceful fingers swiftly took the invitation, sliding along his pale flesh, then plunging inside, thrusting and caressing maddeningly, finding that place deep within that made him pant and moan louder, his slim body shaking. He could barely hold back pleading for what he knew would come next. He somehow managed a deeper, ecstatic breath as the other man's lips broke away from his nether region to warm his inner thighs with gentle kisses. But even with the moment of respite, he couldn't speak what was burning in his heart.

_Make love to me again._

_I know we've been like this all night long, but I waited a lifetime to feel this way. And not once during the time I was waiting did I dream that it would be this beautiful, this wonderful…this perfect. I know in these moments we're together this way that there was never anyone else for me. Maybe the reason I never looked any older on the outside was because I wanted to stay still, to not move, not even to breathe, until the moment you chose me. Now, all I want is to feel your arms holding me, your hands sliding over my skin, your lips loving every inch of me and I want to hear your voice breathing my name._

"Toshiro…"

_Yes, just like that!_

A guiding hand slipped under his soft bottom and he turned onto his belly and raised it readily. He expected to feel the other man position himself for entry, but Byakuya dropped down on Toshiro's sweat-slicked back, running fingers through the wild strands of white hair and laying kisses on the back of his neck.

_Why?_

_Why are you stopping?_

_Gods, don't make me beg for it! I want you inside me!_

"Toshiro, I want to ask you something."

"You want to ask me something now?" Toshiro panted, glancing questioningly over a slender, scarred white shoulder.

"Yes. I want to ask you something right now," Byakuya answered, lacing their fingers together.

 _Oh my god, is this what I think it is_?

 _Is he_ …?

"How do you see me? This? What is happening between us?" the noble inquired.

Toshiro frowned and wriggled out from under the darker-haired man's body. He sat up too quickly and immediately regretted it as stars flashed in front of his blinking eyes.

"Toshiro?" Byakuya said in a concerned tone, curling an arm around him.

"S-sorry," the younger man apologized, blushing, "I just sat up too fast."

Toshiro's heart melted at the guilty look that rose on Byakuya's handsome face.

"I was too indulgent too soon after your injury," he said apologetically, "I did try to hold back, but…I am afraid that holding back does not seem to be an option when I am with you."

Toshiro felt a strange, squeezing sensation in his chest and a sharp, tickling twinge in his belly that left him staring back at Byakuya and unable to answer.

"You understand, do you not? The level of resonance that we seem to share is unprecedented. And I confess that when you are with me, all I want to do is connect with you this way. When you are away, you are still in my mind, teasing it away from everything else."

"You're distracted by thoughts of me?" Toshiro asked, blushing instantly at the thought, "Really?"

Byakuya nodded.

"Is that why you're spoiling my grandma?" Toshiro giggled, blushing more brightly at the giddy feeling it gave him.

"I realized that your contentedness relies partially on her well-being, and that you suffer sensible worries for her. It has been a long time since my own grandmother passed away, but in addition to being the right thing for your grandmother, it seemed to me that respecting your grandmother was also respecting mine in some way. Assisting your grandmother also offered me a way to help one of the many families of my squad members who were lost in the war."

"Well, whatever made you do it," Toshiro said, glancing back over his bare shoulder, "I'm grateful. Grandma took care of me after my parents were killed. It was always the two of us, until I left her to join the academy."

"I was also partially raised by a grandparent," Byakuya said, sliding a hand down the length of one of the younger man's arms and lacing their fingers together, "My mother died bearing me, and my father was killed fighting a powerful group of hollows when I was a teen. My grandfather cared for me after, and we were very close, as you and your grandmother are."

"And then he was called away to serve in the royal realm," Toshiro remembered, "Did you get to see him at all while we were there?"

"I did," Byakuya answered, his lips almost smiling, "He came to visit me during my healing. It was as though not a day had passed."

"It must be horrible, not knowing if you'll ever be able to go there and see him again."

"It is…a weight," Byakuya admitted, "but my pride in my grandfather is such that I will bear that weight willingly. He is happy and he is well. He is protecting all of us by being where he is."

Toshiro felt a worried twinge inside as a sudden thought struck him.

"Do you think you'll someday be called to go there?" he asked, "All of us who ended up fighting in the royal realm were enhanced by exposure to that place. We all grew much stronger."

"There is some possibility," Byakuya affirmed.

"Oh," Toshiro said, feeling all of the breath go out of his lungs, "wow. That would be pretty amazing."

"It would not happen, of course, until I had a grown heir, ready to relieve me as leader of the clan. And my spouse, if living, would go with me."

"Is that right?" Toshiro asked, ducking his head slightly away to hide the deeper flush that was burning on his cheeks.

_I'm sure he's not thinking that would be me…his spouse? He didn't say 'wife.' I wonder, is he starting to look at me like that?_

_Is he really thinking_ …?

Toshiro wasn't sure if the feeling that followed was exhilaration or the beginnings of panic. He heard Byakuya saying more, but the words were garbled and oddly distant. He tore away and crawled onto his knees, running his hands over his face and trying to hear over the loud ringing in his ears. He felt Byakuya's strong arms wrap around him, and the ringing seemed to fade somewhat.

"I will have the healer…" the noble was saying.

"No!" he exclaimed, making Byakuya blink in surprise and gaze at him in silence for a moment while he gathered himself, "S-sorry. I'm fine. I was just…ah…just…"

"You have been exerting yourself too much, trying to go back to work too soon, worrying about your grandmother and bearing my amorous attentions."

"What? No!" Toshiro objected, trying to free himself, only to find himself being held more tightly, "Byakuya…"

"You need to rest, Toshiro," the noble insisted, "You need complete rest with no distractions."

"No, I'm fine. I'll be fine," Toshiro protested, stiffening, "Don't send me off to bed like some little kid! I told you I'm all right now. I don't want to go, and I know you don't want me to leave. Why the hell are you saying this?"

Byakuya tried to stop the little smile that overtook his lips, but failed completely. Toshiro watched with widened eyes as Byakuya's smile blossomed and felt his anger burgeoning. Even so, the fire rising in his body turned to steam and floated away with Byakuya's next words.

"Who said anything about you leaving, anata?" the noble said, smirking, "You can rest right here with me. I only meant that I would not touch you again sexually until you are rested and have eaten."

Toshiro sucked in a shocked breath and found himself blushing again all over.

"Oh…"

Byakuya's face took on a more serious look and he nuzzled into Toshiro's shoulder.

"I will admit that what is happening between us is going to cause some flutters in my family, but it is nothing that you and I cannot handle…if…if you want to see me more seriously."

Whatever thoughts Toshiro was having skittered away like startled birds and he stared at Byakuya wordlessly.

"You…do want to see me romantically, do you not?" Byakuya asked.

"What would that be like?" Toshiro asked, anxiously hearing Nori's concerns echoing in his mind, "What would we have to do?"

Byakuya released him to sit more comfortably, but continued to hold his hand.

"I would need to make a formal announcement of my intent to court you," Byakuya explained, "I would appear before the elders to do this, and they would signal their support or objection. They cannot force me to accept or abandon a relationship, but their approval is important, so I would need to focus them on the strength of the resonance between us. They would likely want to be reassured that you are willing and capable of producing heirs."

Toshiro's heart pounded at the thought, and he swallowed hard and nodded.

"I guess that's reasonable," he managed, "You're the most powerful leader in the history of the clan. Of course they want you to have kids."

"Yes," Byakuya agreed, "but you do understand that there would need to be at least two, and that you would have to agree to bear these children, or to allow me to make them with an approved clan concubine."

"A…a what?" Toshiro gasped, staring, "N-no, I'll…I will do it. I just…I don't think I'm ready to…to go there yet. My head's still spinning from you telling me you want to court me!"

"I know it is a lot to take in," Byakuya assured him, "The actual steps we take can be taken more slowly. I just want you to know ahead of time what is going to happen if we do decide to see each other seriously. Are you all right now? Can I continue?"

"Yeah," Toshiro urged him, "I'm okay. I was only flustered because I don't feel so ready for any of this, but…that doesn't mean I don't want this as much as you do. I…"

He paused, his throat tightening.

_I love you._

_Why can't I say it?_

"I…" he said again, "I…go ahead. I just needed a second to catch up."

_I'm a coward. I heard him tell Nori he's falling in love with me. Why can't I tell him I'm head over heels for him too? What's wrong with me?_

"We would need to be presented at the first ball scheduled in the wake of the war," Byakuya continued.

"We can't just wait a little while? We have to do that now?" Toshiro asked.

Byakuya sighed softly.

"Normally, we would have more time, but the war has been devastating, and it has caused concern about the…future of the clan," the noble explained, "The elders, while not wanting to infringe on my choices are, logically, wanting to ensure the continuance of my bloodline. They will be presenting me a list of possible spouses very soon. If I am to refuse their offering, I must be ready to begin a serious relationship with someone I choose instead. The courtship would take about a year, and then, we would be expected to attempt to conceive a child on our wedding night."

"Eh, that's a lot to think about," Toshiro answered honestly, "I mean, I'm not saying no, but I've seen the way courtships work and I know what's expected if you're a peasant who's going to marry into a noble family."

"It isn't always an easy life," Byakuya agreed, "There will be challenges, both by people who do not approve and also simply those presented by fate over time. You do not need to answer me now, but…"

"Yes."

Byakuya froze, gazing into Toshiro's flustered expression. He reached for something to say, but found himself lost in the charming sight of his handsomely naked partner's tousled hair and blushing flesh.

"But, you just said…" he stammered awkwardly.

"I said that it's a lot to think about," Toshiro acknowledged, "But that's what the long courtship is all about, isn't it?"

Byakuya paused, absorbing the words thoughtfully.

"Actually, yes," he agreed, "In our families, there are often arranged marriages, so the long courtship gives the couple time to get to know one another."

"We've got an advantage there, because we already know each other," Toshiro added, "But even though we know each other, this…what's happening is very sudden."

"Much like a whirlwind," Byakuya agreed.

"That makes the courtship a chance for us to slow down and get used to the idea of being a couple. I need time because I never thought I would be chosen by someone from a noble family, and I absolutely never thought it would involve me having babies."

"I would offer to take that burden on, myself, if I could."

"I know you would," Toshiro answered, brushing a stray wisp of white hair out of his eyes, "When you…"

He stopped himself abruptly.

_He doesn't know I heard him say he was falling in love with me._

"When you care for someone," he continued cautiously, "you put your whole self into it. I didn't know Hisana personally, but since I've spent time with your staff, I know how you were together. Noble life may take some getting used to, but I think with you helping me, I could learn to handle it."

Byakuya gave him a pleased look.

"So, you are willing to give this a chance?" he asked.

"Yes, I already told you I would," Toshiro chuckled, brushing away the stray hair that had found its way back into his eyes, "I'll probably make a million mistakes, but…"

"I will help you," Byakuya promised, letting his fingertips caress the hand he held, "Whatever you need to feel more comfortable, you only have to ask."

"Okay," Toshiro said, taking a steadying breath, "so what happens now?"

Byakuya loosed a stunning smile that left him breathless all over again.

"It is time for us to have a little more equality in our private life," the noble answered.

"A little more…equality?" Toshiro repeated, furrowing his brow.

A moment later, his eyes flew open wide in realization.

"Y-you want me to…?" he stammered, "But, I thought you said you couldn't…because of the possibility of pregnancy. I had to…I mean, if it's what you want, but I…"

He found his words forcibly stopped as Byakuya lunged forward, crashing his lips into the younger man's and plunging his tongue deep into Toshiro's mouth. The noble paused long enough to grant him a dragging breath, then climbed onto his lap, launching a fresh assault on his protesting mouth.

"B-byakuya, are you s-sure? But, I've never…with another man, I haven't…"

"Even if it is just this once then, I want to be with you this way," Byakuya said firmly.

"But, you could…"

Byakuya's hand captured his and guided it to the noble's throat, where a small charm hung.

"What if it fails? Wouldn't you be in trouble with the mmmph…B-Byakuya!"

"I love you," Byakuya said suddenly, stopping and taking Toshiro's blushing face in his hands and kissing him more gently, "and because of that, I will give you something I have given no one else."

"Are you sure?" Toshiro asked uncertainly, "You said that sometimes pregnancy charms fail. I don't want you to get in trouble with your family."

"I will not," Byakuya assured him.

"How can you promise that?"

"Toshiro," Byakuya said, shocking him all over again by moving his hips and rubbing their hardened arousals together, "please trust me. Make love to me. I promise you, this is what I most want."

Toshiro tried to answer, but the ringing returned to his ears with fresh fury. He reeled, leaning against Byakuya's shoulder and trying to force his lips to move, but darkness seemed to push in all around him, until everything disappeared into a deep, grey haze.

He woke some hours later and found Byakuya sitting quietly beside the bed and wearing a worried expression.

"Byakuya? What happened?" he asked, starting to sit up, only to have the noble push him gently back down again, "Did I pass out?"

"Yes. I had Michio examine you and then called on Urahara Kisuke to confirm what he found."

"What did they find? What's wrong with me?" Toshiro asked anxiously, "Was it because of…because of what that quincy did to me?"

"No," Byakuya assured him, "It was not your injuries from before."

"Oh, that's a relief," the younger man sighed, "So, what is it? What's making me feel sick and pass out? It's happened a few times."

"Yes, and it will happen some more. I am not sure what you are going to feel about this. I will understand if you feel…that you are not ready."

Toshiro looked back at him blankly.

"Toshiro, the reason for your physical symptoms is that…you have already conceived our child."


	10. Timeless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Toshiro begin their courtship.

"Toshiro?"

The white-haired taicho felt a gentle touch on his hand, but couldn't seem to answer, to move an inch, to draw a breath.

 _So much is hanging on this moment_ , he realized, _Byakuya and I, until that little touch in the royal realm, were just comrades, maybe friends. I never saw him in the light I see him now. I never looked closely enough to notice how very beautiful he is, how breathtaking, how just looking into his eyes can make my knees weaken._

_But pregnant?_

_Me_?

 _Did he really say that_?

A cool hand curved around his cheek.

"Toshiro?"

"Sorry," he managed, trying to find his breath that had left him, "Did you say…?"

"I know very well that you and not ready to hear this," Byakuya said quietly, his soft fingers caressing the younger man's cheek and sliding down the curve of his clenched jaw, "It has taken me by surprise as well. You don't need to say anything for a moment. Breathe, Toshiro."

He realized that his chest was bursting and spots were dancing again in front of his startled eyes. He expelled the air and took a ragged breath, falling against a warm, strong shoulder. His eyes closed and he breathed in more deeply, taking in Byakuya's disarmingly sweet scent and feeling his heart skipping and pounding hard in his chest.

"Is this for real?"

He wasn't sure if he had spoken aloud, but he felt Byakuya shift and then, the uncertain touch of the dark, lovely grey eyes he was beginning to see even when he slept, whose touch felt like petals falling on a warm breeze.

_I should be scared to death, right?_

_I just got through telling him that I need time, and now, hearing this…I just…_

His mind spun away as he felt Byakuya's arms wrap around him.

"Your reiatsu is weak. The presence of the baby's spirit in the spirit chamber that has formed inside you will put pressure on your systems. It is not dangerous, but it will require that I infuse you with my reiatsu to keep yours and the child's in balance. Imbalances will intensify the effects. The infusions will relieve some of the dizziness and illness you have been feeling."

"Mmhmm," Toshiro managed, relaxing slightly and leaning back against Byakuya's chest.

He wasn't sure what he should be thinking, but all that could reach him was how warm, how safe, how undeniably right it felt to be where he was, still under Byakuya's smooth hands, tilting his head slightly, inviting the noble's lips to brush the sensitive flesh of the side of his throat. He felt the moment of hesitation and a little smile found its way onto his face as the invitation was tentatively accepted. Byakuya's hands opened and spread out over his slim belly, glowing with his presence and sending his reiatsu out to melt through the younger man's skin. Toshiro could almost feel it descend and wrap around the spirit chamber. His eyes dampened suddenly as he felt, not one, but two very tiny presences. He felt Byakuya stiffen for a moment, and the little, startled breath that escaped him.

"Toshiro…"

"I feel it."

Soft ends of Byakuya's hair tickled his neck as the noble nodded.

"Their souls are too young yet to be fully aware, but they feel our presences, and they will quickly begin to recognize the feel of our reiatsu."

Toshiro nodded stiffly, but couldn't speak around the lump in his throat and the tightness in his chest.

"Are you all right?" Byakuya asked, "I know you don't feel ready for this. If it makes you feel any better, I am also…unsettled, this coming so suddenly."

He paused and laced together the fingers of one hand with Toshiro's.

"I had hoped to let you have more time to reflect on everything. We have gone from one thing to another with barely time to think."

Toshiro's eyes slid closed and his free hand came to rest on his belly.

"I always wondered what my mother felt when I was inside her and growing," he said distractedly, "I wondered if she was happy I was there. My father was her best friend, but they were only together once before he was killed by a hollow. She was injured, but because of his sacrifice, we lived. The healers told her that her injury impacted me, and that's why I was born with white hair. She called me her angel. She said that after he died, I was the only thing that mattered. Then…she died too, of illness. Her injury left her weakened. Grandma wrote down the last words that she said to me, because she knew I was too young to remember them."

His mind wandered back in time, and he felt himself lifted and looking down into blue eyes that looked like his own.

_Toshiro, my precious angel, we will watch over you. And someday, you will understand what love is. Love is those eyes that warm you with just their touch. It is the hands that make you feel safe, the voice that melts your heart in your chest and the breath that feels like it's keeping you alive. When you feel this, you will know what we felt that made you._

He turned and started to speak, then froze, staring as he spotted the tears that had escaped onto Byakuya's porcelain cheeks. Otherwise perfectly controlled, he made no move to stop them as they began to roll down his face. Toshiro smiled and brushed them away.

"It was the same for your parents too, wasn't it?" he asked, "They really loved each other?"

Byakuya nodded.

"I never knew my mother. As I told you, she died as I was born. But, my father and I walked through the gardens and out to her grave every day. And while we were walking, he told me how they met. She was a spirited child, who did not embrace the rules of her family, and often escaped from her home to explore in the fields between their properties. They met there, and he said that he fell in love at once with her wild hair and pretty grey eyes. She was only ever able to be calm when he held her. Her parents were shocked when he asked for her hand, and even more stunned when she accepted without argument. They were very happy together, and nothing made them happier than when they learned about my conception. My father told me that my mother's fine spirits passed to me as she took her last breath. Even as she died, she was smiling as she looked at us together."

He paused, burying his nose in the wild strands of Toshiro's soft hair.

"Our story may be different," he said finally, "but there is no denying that we resonate with promise. We can be happy as they were, but we need to both want this for it to happen. You seemed unsure before. What do you think now, Toshiro?"

Toshiro allowed himself a long, slow breath.

_This isn't at all what I expected. I don't know what I thought would happen, or if I thought anything would happen at all. I was in that child form for so long, just wanting to stay there. I didn't dream of falling in love or making a family. I already had a family. I was happy with it being just me and Grandma…well, and Momo, of course. That was all I wanted. But, even though I could hold myself still, we all changed over time. My powers grew, and Momo and I went to the academy._

_I felt guilty._

_I thought I wanted nothing more than to be that angel my mom called me. She wanted me to watch over Grandma, and for a long time, I did. I felt terrible when I left, and I haven't been sure it was the right thing ever since. She said that I was given strong powers, and that I needed to use them to protect more than just her. My mother's gift needed to be spread around and shared_. 

_What gift is here inside me, waiting to be shared?_

His fingers tightened where they held Byakuya's and he turned, seeking the darker-haired man's lips.

"I don't know," he confessed between kisses, "I can't decide if I'm happy or if I'm scared to death."

He tripped headlong over the beautiful smile Byakuya gave him in reply and surrendered to a longer bout of kissing that ended with the joining of their bodies in a slower, gentler exchange of passions. After, they laid, side-by-side, looking up at the white ceiling and saying nothing for a time.

 _I should be scared to death_ , Toshiro mused inwardly, placing his hands behind his head and breathing slowly, _Noble life is really strict. There will be lots of rules I will have to follow. Well, at least if I am having two kids now, I won't have to have any more unless we want to. I'm sure some of the family will be disapproving, but Byakuya approves. That's really all that should matter. I can handle the rest if I know he loves me._

And there was no doubt as he turned and read the genuine affection in the dark-haired man's gaze. Byakuya's palm curved around his cheek and he leaned forward, offering Toshiro a tender brushing of his lips.

"So, what happens now?" Toshiro asked uncertainly, "I mean, we were supposed to have a long courtship to get to know each other better. What do we do now?"

Byakuya sighed, leaning against his shoulder.

"Heirs cannot be born out of wedlock," he said quietly.

Toshiro swallowed hard.

"We have to get married now?" he asked.

"If I want to acknowledge the children you are carrying, if you wish to see them acknowledged as my progeny and able to wear the Kuchiki name…"

"Okay," Toshiro managed in a shaky voice.

"Toshiro," Byakuya said, taking his hand, "if you do not want to be married to me, you do not have to be. While it is true that not being married means they will have your surname and I will not acknowledge them publicly, we will know who their father is. I will not abandon you or them. You have my word."

"You don't want to get married?" Toshiro asked, his heart cracking almost audibly at the thought.

_What's wrong with me? Why does it feel like that to think that he doesn't want this? I'm not sure it's what I want. I'm feeling so many things all at once, I don't know what to do._

He felt Byakuya's arms encircle him and the noble's chin came to rest on the back of his shoulder.

 _It feels so safe here. When his arms are around me, it feels so warm. All of that worry just disappears when he holds me. If I could just stay here all of the time_ …

He felt Byakuya's lips brush against the side of his neck and a little tickle went through his insides.

"I love you," Byakuya breathed into his ear, "I know you don't feel ready to marry me yet. I will respect that and accept it if you want to raise the children out of the spotlight of noble life. If you want them to have a gentler upbringing…"

"I love you too," Toshiro answered, stopping him abruptly, "I don't feel ready at all to do any of this, but I don't think that's any reason to hide them from everyone. I won't be ashamed of them. People will disapprove, and I know Rangiku will do her best to embarrass the hell out of me, once she knows, but…I will do this. Just promise me one thing."

Byakuya looked at him questioningly out of the corner of one dark eye.

"Don't die."

Byakuya wasn't sure how the words undid him so suddenly. His face that had been so calm before, radiated with regret. His hands found Toshiro's and joined warmly with them. He buried his face in the younger man's shoulder, nuzzling him affectionately.

"I think we both know that time makes us no promises, but for what time is given to me, I will love and protect you with all of my heart."

"It's okay," Toshiro answered, blinking against the burning in his eyes, "I knew you couldn't make a promise like that."

"Then, you will…?"

"Yes."

"Toshiro…you have no idea…" Byakuya said breathlessly, reeling as his white-haired lover turned and brought him down onto his back, attacking his smiling mouth with hard, wet kisses. One grasping hand found the noble's soft inner thigh and Byakuya's legs parted willingly, yielding first to the younger man's voracious lips and sweeping pink tongue, then to wetted fingertips that began a slow, tentative preparation.

"Are you sure this is okay with you?" Toshiro asked, pausing for a moment to admire his tumble-haired lover.

 _Byakuya is always so properly clean, dressed, hair in order. Before this began, I never even saw a hair out of place when our fights got serious. To see him in open and rumpled clothing with his hair in disarray_ …

_Oh my god, I love him!_

Without waiting for an answer, he dove onto Byakuya's surrendered body, burying his inflamed penis deep inside his noble lover's heated core, almost disappearing into the beauty of their full connection. Byakuya moved easily with him, loosing soft sounds of contentment and arousal.

 _I wonder if I should be gentler. He hasn't let anyone take him before. Am I hurting him? I know it hurts some_ …

He felt Byakuya's hands wrap around his bottom, encouraging the hard, fast thrust of his hips, and he let his doubts fall away. His breath escaped him in hard, panting moans as their virulent movements brought them swiftly to the edges of bliss. Toshiro's blue eyes locked on Byakuya's pools of deep grey as their pleasure crested, carrying the two into the shuddering throes of completion. They collapsed on Byakuya's bed in a tangle of bedding and partially shed clothing. Neither spoke as they let the haze of afterglow settle over their recovering bodies. They laid for a time, holding hands and exchanging gentler kisses, then exited the bed, tying their yukatas back in place and donning slippers before walking out, onto the walkway and heading into the gardens together, their hands still clasping.

Neither saw Rangiku, who stepped out of her guest room, yawning and stretching. She blinked slowly, breathing in the sweet, flower scented air, then froze like a deer, staring at the two taichos who walked, hand-in-hand along the garden path.

"Well, well, well, Taicho," she giggled softly, "It's about time."

She smirked playfully, preparing to step out and call Toshiro out on his new romance. But just as she started to move, a soft hand touched her arm, stopping her. Rangiku's head turned and she met Momo's happy eyes questioningly.

"Don't disturb them," Momo whispered, "I don't remember seeing Shiro-chan or Kuchiki taicho looking so happy, especially since the war. Let's just let them be happy."

"But I can't pass up a chance to…"

"You can tease them at breakfast," Momo laughed, grabbing her hand and tugging her in the opposite direction.

In the gardens, Toshiro matched Byakuya's stride and the two walked in an unhurried fashion, breathing in the fresh air and watching pink, white and red petals fall from the trees that lined the path.

"What will you do now?" Toshiro asked, "I mean, there's no courtship, right? You just…tell them, and they, what? What if they're angry?"

"The elders could object to the naming of the children as heirs, but they probably will not," Byakuya replied, keeping his eyes focused on the falling petals. "Most of them will just be glad they can stop worrying about whether I will ever reproduce, while others will register their objections, but will let it go at that. I don't expect there to be any serious objection. Assuming that, the elders will, after a simple vote, approve the match based on the level of our resonance and the presence of children. We will receive a marriage certificate, and then be freed to decide how we wish to celebrate our joining."

"But we'll just be married…like that?" Toshiro mused.

"Sometimes to safeguard the family's honor, a couple might be confidentially wed to avoid embarrassment in case of children made out of wedlock or other things that are frowned upon. In that case, a public reception is held later, often to greet the child of the union."

"How do you want to be married?" Toshiro asked, "Do you want to do it in front of a lot of people? I've seen some noble weddings. It looked uncomfortable."

"I think I would like to spare you that."

"Thank you."

"We could have a smaller gathering, perhaps in Kuchiki Manor gardens, once the manor is rebuilt. You are welcome to include any friends and family you wish. Or…if there is a special place where you would like to be wed…perhaps your grandmother's home? We could have a small gathering there."

Toshiro stiffened suddenly, and his face brightened.

"Did you think of a place where you would like to hold the ceremony?" asked Byakuya.

"Yeah, if it's possible," Toshiro replied, looking up at him, "There's a footbridge near Grandma's house. My grandparents were married there, and so were my folks. Could we go there?"

"As you wish," Byakuya said, making a sound of surprise as his more expressive mate wrapped his arms around him, hugging him tightly.

"Thanks, Byakuya. I know you weren't expecting all of this, any more than I was, but it means a lot that you're doing this."

"You are making one of my fondest wishes come true, anata," Byakuya answered, "I had thought, after Hisana, I couldn't even desire a spouse and family. Thinking of what I lost was too painful. But…you have brought that dream back to life. For that, I am deeply grateful. And so, whatever you want to do to celebrate our union, I want also."

"Really?" Toshiro asked, blushing, "I need to go and tell my Grandma…and Byakuya, I would really like it if you would come with me. I want to introduce you."

"Of course," Byakuya said, squeezing his hand and kissing his cheek, "It would be an honor."

"Can we leave now?"

Byakuya frowned thoughtfully.

"We haven't had breakfast, and you need to eat."

"I can't eat until I get there and tell her. I promise she won't let me starve," Toshiro insisted, "Besides, if we stay, Rangiku will probably have found out about us and she'll drive me into an early grave with her teasing."

"Then, by all means, we will go now," Byakuya said, looking amused.

"Great," Toshiro said, looking around.

"What are you looking for?"

"Ikazuchi," Toshiro replied, "Where is he?"

"He will be here in a few minutes, but…"

"But what?" Toshiro asked, smiling.

"Perhaps before we leave…you will want to put on some clothes, _anata_. I do not think you want to announce your wedding to your grandmother while wearing your pajamas."


	11. What True Love Is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya gives Toshiro a very beautiful surprise!

Toshiro stood, oddly still for the impulsive person he knew well that he was, and gazing silently at the lovely reflection of the one he wasn't sure at all how he had become. Akio, spread layers of expensive material, clouds of pale blue, bright silver and pure white over his freshly washed flesh, while Akio's elder brother, Koji, worked at the wild spikes of his hair. The result was something that still looked like him, but transcended into beauty that he was sure he had never seen there before. He frowned and looked more closely, trying to make sense of the image, then as his soft belly was exposed for a moment, a smile blossomed on his lips. The two attendants paused in their efforts, watching delightedly as Toshiro's hand crept down to rub the little bump that had begun to form there.

"I don't believe it," he whispered, "I mean, I understood when Byakuya told me that I was going to have a child, but it didn't feel real before."

"It's very real now, isn't it?" Akio replied, exchanging happy glances with his brother, "You look…"

"Radiant," Byakuya's voice interrupted, "Our family tailor, Nobu, never fails to bring out the best in whoever he dresses. He surpasses the mark this time, I think."

"With you too," Toshiro answered, admiring the royal purple and blue formal kimono the Kuchiki leader wore, "You look amazing, Byakuya."

Byakuya moved in behind him, placing his arms around Toshiro and commencing a gentle infusion as the two attendants watched and waited patiently.

"Thank you, anata," he whispered in the younger man's ear, sending a little shiver through Toshiro and making his insides quiver, "And as soon as Akio and Koji finish dressing you, we can leave for the Rukongai. I have sent a messenger ahead to speak to Chinami, so that although we will certainly surprise your grandmother with the news, we will not inconvenience her."

"That's probably best," Toshiro chuckled, "although Grandma is pretty used to me being kind of spontaneous. I'm sure she'll be happy for us."

"I look forward to meeting her in person," Byakuya said, nuzzling his cheek, then kissing him on the side of the neck.

"Really?" asked Toshiro, looking both amused and pleased at the thought.

Byakuya smiled and nodded.

"She is an important part of who you are, and you…fascinate me."

"What are you talking about?" Toshiro mused, shaking his head, "Byakuya, you and I have known each other for quite a lot of years."

"Mmhmm," Byakuya acknowledged, letting a finger tease the younger man's navel as he continued the gentle infusion of the spirit chamber inside him, "and in all of that time, I never really looked at you. I should have."

"I wasn't anything to look at," Toshiro said, blushing, "I stayed in child form like Peter Pan of the living world, because I didn't want to change. I didn't want the people and things around me to change. I wanted things to stay the same, because every time things changed in my life, the changes hurt. But, you know what I mean, right? You lost your parents and your grandmother, and even though Ginrei still serves in the royal realm, you have sort of lost him too. I've lost my parents, but I did hold on to Momo and Grandma. Still…"

Byakuya slid the fingers of one hand into his.

"Still," Byakuya continued for him, "you know that the inevitable losses are out there. You know that there are good things you are missing, but you cling to what you know you will lose, because you are desperate for a way to keep things as they are, and not to lose them. It is not just you, anata. I, too, have felt these same things with each loss."

"But, you've forced yourself through them," Toshiro observed, "And while I thought that remaining in my child form and fighting the changes was showing strength, it wasn't. It was just denying that change was going to happen anyway. I could hold myself still. I had that much control, but I couldn't change the fates of Momo or my grandmother. I get that now. I guess I don't need to stand still anymore."

He turned to face Byakuya, who smiled and brushed a few misbehaving strands of wild white hair out of his eyes.

"When I'm with you, I want things to happen. I want things to move forward. I know that means I'll also lose things and people I love, but that was never in my control…not ever. And even though I'll lose good things, I'll build them, too. I'll build them with you, Byakuya."

"Yes," Byakuya agreed, taking the younger man's face in his hands and kissing Toshiro's lips gently, "We have already begun that, have we not?"

"Yeah," Toshiro agreed, smiling hopefully and patting his baby bump affectionately, "I'm not saying I'll ever just let things have their way with me or with the people I love."

"No, not you."

"I will still fight, tooth and nail for every last minute."

"As well you should," Byakuya agreed, "I will also."

"Then, we'll be all right," Toshiro concluded, kissing Byakuya back, then nuzzling into his shoulder.

He glanced at the attendants, who had respectfully retreated.

"Well, we'd better finish up and be on our way. We don't want to keep Grandma waiting."

He stood quietly, his eyes meeting Byakuya's in the large mirror, as the attendants returned and finished their work. When they stepped away, Byakuya moved to stand beside him. Toshiro grinned at their handsome reflection.

"We look really good together," he chuckled.

"We look like we belong together," Byakuya added.

He turned the two of them towards the garden doors, and they walked out to find Ikazuchi waiting, and to his surprise, Tetsuya and Ichigo sitting astride Tetsuya's tall black Arabian, waiting for them.

"Tetsuya," Byakuya greeted his cousin.

His lips quirked slightly as he met the eyes of the Shiba heir, and he gave Ichigo a feigned look of mild annoyance.

"Ichigo."

"Byakuya-sama, Toshiro-sama," Tetsuya greeted them.

"Hey Byakuya, Toshiro," Ichigo said in a good-natured tone.

Toshiro smiled.

"That's Hitsugaya taichou to you," he said in a casual, joking tone.

"Not for long, I hear," Ichigo said, smiling back at him, "You'll be a Kuchiki soon."

Mild surprise reflected suddenly in Toshiro's eyes and he glanced at Byakuya curiously. Byakuya nodded briefly and helped his fiancé onto Ikazuchi's back.

"Toshiro will have the option of using his own surname or taking mine," the Kuchiki leader explained, "On our official papers and in public noble events, he will be Kuchiki Toshiro, but he may be called whatever he wishes by everyone else."

"I'm a little surprised I didn't wonder about that before," Toshiro mused, blushing, "I guess I'll have to think about it. I am…proud to officially be named a member of the Kuchiki family."

"But," Byakuya said, mounting behind him and nudging his lovely paint stallion into a walk, "my name is not a prison."

"Sometimes, I expect it will feel like one," Toshiro acknowledged, "but it will also be freeing in other ways. I'm grateful to have the option, Byakuya. Thank you."

"It is nothing, anata."

Ichigo smirked and leaned forward to whisper into Tetsuya's ear.

"Man, Byakuya can really be charming when he's in love."

Tetsuya made a little sound of amusement and bit his lips gently to stop a smile. He guided Arashi to Ikazuchi's side.

"They look really good together," Ichigo added softly, "I've never seen either one of them look that happy before."

"That's because you tend to annoy both of them until they snap at you," Tetsuya chided his smirking boyfriend.

The two mounts moved at a slow, steady pace, carrying their riders past the entry guards and out the front gates of the manor and onto the street. The sounds of hammers, electric saws and loud shouts filled the air around them. Scents of earth and freshly cut wood felt more pleasant than the sight of the partially reconstructed buildings, but it was good, Toshiro thought, to see progress being made at returning the Seireitei to some sense of normality.

As they made their way down the road, some of the noises stopped, and the dirty faces of the workers peeked out at them from the tumble of works in progress. Gradually, lines of people began to form on the sides of the road. Toshiro felt a little tickle of anxiety, although as a taichou, he was used to being looked at.

_It's just that they're looking at me differently than I'm used to, he reasoned._

And indeed, the comments he heard as they passed seemed to support that thinking.

"Is that…Hitsugaya taichou?"

"He looks like a prince!"

_I feel like a toad who's been put into a prince's body, Toshiro mused inwardly._

"They look so beautiful!"

"I heard they are going to be married!"

Toshiro blinked in surprise as a number of the people on the sides of the road began to toss flowers onto the ground in front of them.

"Are you all right, anata?" Byakuya whispered in his ear.

"F-fine," Toshiro assured him, "It's only that…these people have just been through something terrible. The Seireitei is wrecked and they are working hard to fix it, but we put on these clothes and just pass them, and they stop and throw flowers for our horses to walk on? Byakuya…"

"They find these signs of what they remember from before, encouraging," Byakuya explained, "We cannot, right now, add anything to their efforts, so our contribution is to raise their spirits by letting them know that not everything has been lost."

"I'm more of the pitch in and help kind of person," Toshiro chuckled, "But you're right that now isn't the time."

"We will make our contribution to the rebuilding after we have seen to our nuptials," Byakuya promised, "Just for now, we will encourage them."

"Deal," Toshiro answered, lifting a hand as he had seen the noble's do and waving gently to acknowledge the people they passed.

He couldn't help blushing at the comments that reached his ears as they passed the thickening crowds, but he held his composure carefully as they made their way out of the Seireitei gates and into the upper Rukongai. It nagged at him a little that the horses seemed to move so slowly, but then, he was sure it was appropriate, considering that they were important people.

_I do remember from when I was a kid that I was glad that the nobles who paraded through the town moved slowly. It gave us a better chance to look at them._

He couldn't help smiling.

_People want to look at me._

He remembered the lovely reflection of himself in the mirror in Byakuya's home.

_It feels kind of weird, but having been one of them, I know why they want to see. People like to look at beautiful things. I've just never thought of myself as beautiful. I've never felt beautiful. It's all a little strange, but…it's not a bad kind of strange, is it?_

Are you feeling all right?" Byakuya breathed into his ear, "We can stop and find a quiet place to rest, if you wish."

"No, I'm okay," Toshiro assured him, squeezing his hand, "This just takes some getting used to."

"You are making quite an impression," Byakuya complimented him, "And they are right. You look stunning."

"Stop it!" Toshiro hissed softly, "You're making me blush."

"It only makes you more lovely."

"Byakuya…"

Toshiro stopped suddenly as he realized that they had reached the edge of town and that the horses had come to a halt in front of a group of people he knew. And just beyond them stood the footbridge.

"What is this?" he mused, staring as Chinami led his grandmother forward and Byakuya slid down and helped him down to greet the women.

"Grandma," Toshiro said softly, gazing intently at her eyes that looked overwhelmed with a kind of happiness he had never seen in them.

"Welcome, Kuchiki taichou," the old woman greeted Byakuya, beginning to bow.

Byakuya extended a hand, touching her arm to stop her, then he bowed respectfully and kissed the back of her hand.

_Why is everyone here?_

_Momo…Rangiku…the other taichous and fukutaichous?_

He glanced at Byakuya, then at the footbridge area that had been decorated with bright flowers and little, colorful lights.

_Does this mean…?_

"My lady," he heard Byakuya say in a solemn, but tender voice, "I am here to inquire if I may have your grandson's hand in marriage. I am taken with Toshiro's fine spirits, his beauty and his power. I know he is your pride and joy, and I promise that I will do my best to make him happy."

The old woman gazed back at Byakuya with a look that left no doubt in Toshiro's mind that he was, in fact, his grandmother's most treasured thing. She nodded and smiled up at the waiting noble leader, a sweet little flush rising on her face.

"I am honored, Kuchiki tai…"

"Please, call me Byakuya," the noble instructed her.

His grandmother's smile widened.

"I am honored to accept your offer of marriage to my Toshiro," she answered proudly, "Byakuya."

 _Is this really happening_? Toshiro wondered, _How did he do this? So quickly, he notified everyone and got them all to come here._

_This is amazing!_

The feeling was surreal as he moved forward to hug his grandma, then the two walked with Byakuya to the footbridge, where they made their way to the top of the little rise at the bridge's center.

_We're getting married here? Now? Like this?_

Toshiro found himself blinking back tears as Byakuya's fingers laced together with his again. He turned suddenly and surprised his fiancé's lips with a powerful kiss. He hugged Byakuya tightly, burrowing into his shoulder to make everything else disappear for a moment.

"I think that part comes later, anata," Byakuya said, giving him an amused look.

"Sorry," Toshiro said breathlessly, "I just want to say thank you for this. For making all of this happen. I don't know how you did it, but it's everything I wanted!"

"I am glad. I know you still have doubts about our union, but I do promise that I will try to make you happy, Toshiro."

"Well, you've done that a hundred times over today," Toshiro managed, sniffing and blinking back tears. This is perfect. It's a perfect moment. And it never would have happened if I hadn't let it…if we hadn't let it."

Byakuya discreetly brushed the tears from the corners of Toshiro's eyes and the white-haired taichou straightened, taking his place beside the Kuchiki leader and standing proudly as they were guided through their vows.

 _My mom and dad stood here_ , Toshiro mused, _Grandma and Grandpa stood here. And each of them had their doubts and their hopes. Each of them had their story that brought them there. And whatever the ending, each of them loved the other completely. No one held back. I want that for Byakuya and for myself. I want the kind of love my parents and grandparents had. I was scared this could be a mistake, but I see now that it isn't a mistake at all. Byakuya loves me and I love him. However things happened, that is the truth._

_I love you, Byakuya_

_What you did today shows me that you love me too. You love me enough to set all of this up, to come here, to my home and to show my family deep respect. You could have demanded and taken. Once I was having your baby, the laws gave you the right to have me, no matter what I thought or felt. But you didn't just take what you had a right to. You did all of this to make me feel respected and loved…treasured. And I will spend the rest of my life, showing you my gratitude for that._

_Thank you, Byakuya._

_Thank you._

_Thank you so much._

He heard the officiant stop talking and he felt the eyes of everyone around them watching him. He knew instantly what part of the wedding they had reached, and he looked into Byakuya's dark, wondering eyes and answered resoundingly.

"I will."

The officiant smiled.

"By the power given me, I now pronounce you noble prince and noble consort, Kuchikis Byakuya and Toshiro. Please now exchange a kiss as the first gift of your marriage."

He was sure that the meeting of their lips was chaste and only took a moment, but the warmth refused to leave him…as the service ended, as they left the footbridge and walked back to his grandmother's home, as they talked and laughed and ate with their friends and danced until long after the sun had set. It was still with him as they laid down that night together, and he treated his new husband to a nightlong heartfelt display of every bit of his affection.

As morning arrived to find them drunk with the overwhelming beauty of their connection, lying naked with Byakuya's spent cock still buried deep in his new husband's overflowing core, and they began to finally drift off, Byakuya's sleepy voice sounded in his ear.

"I take it you enjoyed the wedding, Toshiro."

"You take it right."


	12. The Calling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya and Toshiro's passions burn brightly...

Byakuya woke well before the first light of morning to find his naked body wrapped warmly around his new husband's and the fingers of one hand entwined with Toshiro's, while the fingers of the other had become entangled in the tumble of white hairs. His face was buried in the back of Toshiro's bare shoulder, making it easy for him to move only slightly to kiss the pale flesh under a tender earlobe. Toshiro sucked in a deeper breath and shifted a little, but remained deeply asleep. Byakuya felt a twinge of guilt at the thought of leaving his new bride, but knew that a thousand obligations awaited him.

_Last night was the loveliest night of my life. There is such a rapturous connection between Toshiro and me. For the first time, there is someone who is strong enough, not just to bear the heaviness of my reiatsu while we make love, but someone who relishes the physical and emotional connection as much as I do. It was almost fear inducing, at times, how well we read each other. From the first time when we made love just to cure my reaction to his reiatsu…it is like we set a fire that we cannot put out. It continues to burn, day and night, wherever we are and whatever we are doing, so that each time we meet, the flames rise and we burn together again. I have never felt anything like this._

_Never_.

_I do not want to get out of this bed. Not now or ever. I could forget every obligation and spend eternity locked in this man's arms and living purely on our love. I would die in his arms._

_Ah, but the reality begins to close in. I must appear before the elders this morning to finalize the marriage and to assist in the formation of the public announcement to be made later this morning. I must also meet with Kyouraku soutaichou to make an official Gotei announcement. The fourth division repairs have reached a point where the injured will begin to be transferred there today, and I must meet with the Kuchiki Manor staff and construction workers to prepare the manor for our return. Precautions must be taken to establish a route and security for the trip back to Sakura no Kaiyou, where we will await the completion of repairs and adjustments to the manor before making the final journey home. ___

____

Byakuya found himself suddenly smiling.

____

_I do hope that Toshiro's grandmother will accept our invitation to move to Kuchiki Manor. I know she has resided in the same town for many years, but it would be pleasant to have her living with us. She loves Toshiro dearly, and she reminds me quite a bit of my own grandmother. Yes, I hope that she is amenable to moving into the manor._

____

He kissed the soft skin on the back of his sleeping husband's neck, closing his eyes and catching his breath as his unrepentant member slid lazily out of his husband's lovely white bottom and he carefully disentangled himself from Toshiro's plundered body. A sleepy moan escaped the younger man and he curled around the pillows, before sinking back into a deeper sleep and beginning to snore softly. Byakuya paused to watch the sweet sight of his lover contentedly sleeping, then he sighed and moved to where his uniform had been laid out for him. He dressed slowly, continuing to steal glances at Toshiro's curled form and recalling the heat and beauty of their wedding night.

____

_I cannot believe that just the thought is making me aroused again, and after making love to him so many times last night. It is scandalous how Toshiro riles me. It is like a hunger that cannot be sated, a thirst that cannot be quenched. A few more moments, and I will not get out of this room without waking him to another bout of sex. Toshiro is pregnant and needs to rest after our exertions. I am not touching him until we return to Sakura no Kaiyou tonight._

____

He hurried through the rest of his preparations, then paused at the desk in the room to write a note to his husband. He left the note on the nightstand and slipped out of the room into the quiet hallway. He heard soft voices as he reached the kitchen and found Chinami and Toshiro's grandmother sitting at the table together, talking and laughing about the wedding. The two paused at his appearance and for some reason he couldn't begin to fathom, Byakuya felt like a child, peeking in on two adults. He blinked in confusion at the sensation, then gave the women and brief smile inclined his head in greeting.

____

"Good morning…"

____

He paused, realizing suddenly.

____

_Toshiro has never told me her name._

____

The old woman smiled widely.

____

"Just call me Grandma, my dear," she invited him, "Come and sit down. Chinami has made your favorite tea and breakfast for you. Your Torio made sure Chinami knew what to prepare."

____

"Arigatou," Byakuya said politely, "Good morning, Grandma. Good morning, Chinami."

____

"Good morning, Byakuya-sama," the old woman chuckled, "You are up very early, like old Grandma. But I imagine you have a lot of responsibilities, being leader of your clan."

____

"Yes," Byakuya agreed, "Toshiro should sleep as late as he likes, but I must return to the Seireitei to see to a number of obligations. But, before I go, I would like to ask you if you would consider moving to Kuchiki Manor to live with Toshiro and me. I know that Toshiro worries about you, and having you living him would ease his concern. You needn't give up your home here, of course. And any time you wish to visit here, Chinami can accompany you. I will understand, of course, if you…"

____

He paused at the pleased grin that had transformed the old woman's face.

____

"You want old Grandma to come and live with you?" she laughed merrily, "What a sweet boy you are to think of doing that. But, why would you want to?"

____

She looked at Byakuya more closely for a moment and her blue eyes softened and warmed.

____

"Oh, my dear, you're missing your own Grandma, aren't you?" she said, freezing him in place for a moment as her palm curved around his face.

____

_She is right, of course._

____

"It's plain as day," the old woman went on, "Well, then if it is what my Toshiro and his handsome prince want, I will accept your offer, Byakuya-sama."

____

"It will be a few more days to make some final repairs and to prepare the rooms for us, but I will notify Chinami as soon as everything is ready."

____

He met Chinami's eyes for a moment.

____

"You are welcome to continue your service to Grandma at Kuchiki Manor or to remain on staff at her home here," he offered.

____

"Thank you, Kuchiki taichou," the woman said, bowing, "You are very kind, sir!"

____

The three turned their attention to their breakfast, then Byakuya left the house and whistled for his mount, who trotted up to meet him a few moments later. He climbed onto the tall paint's back and turned towards the Seireitei, his heart light at the thought of the family about to move into the manor.

____

_And soon there will be a child._

____

The thought took the chill out of the morning air and warmed him as he started back to the Seireitei.

____

__

__

XXXXXXXXXX

__

__

____

By the time awareness returned to Toshiro, bringing him awake, it was already late morning, bordering on midday. He was so comfortably entangled in the warm bedding, naked, splashed with their mingled seed and nested so wonderfully, he briefly considered just going back to sleep. He might have been disappointed at finding Byakuya already gone from the bed, but he knew very well that his husband must have a thousand things to do in the wake of their sudden wedding. The note at their bedside confirmed his suspicions.

____

_I have something to do to also._

____

_I haven't told Grandma about the baby yet. I know she'll be really happy, although it'll surprise her that I am pregnant. I didn't know about noble pregnancy before. She probably doesn't either. It's a little strange_ , he thought, reaching down to rub the more pronounced bump on his belly, _but I got used to it pretty fast, and as soon as Grandma knows about this little one, she's going to be spoiling me rotten…like she doesn't already._

____

_I don't mind._

____

_It was just us for a long time after Mom and Dad died. I wonder if Grandma ever worried that our family would die out with her and me. For a long time, I didn't even want to grow up at all. I never thought about getting married and having babies. There was no one I wanted to do all of that with. I liked Momo, of course, but she was like a sister. I never felt attracted to her._

____

_Byakuya and I were comrades. I always felt that he was impressed with my abilities and we respected each other, but I think the fact that I remained in that younger form kept us at a distance that didn't allow anything to happen. I had to grow up on the inside enough to let my outside grow, before we could make that connection. It all started with that little touch, his attempt to show respect for my dignity by not letting me fall. So, instead, we both took a much larger tumble into love. This is crazy. It's just crazy how much we love each other now._

____

Toshiro rolled lazily onto his back, leaving his yukata open, and he gazed up at the white ceiling, his hand resting on his baby bump and rubbing intermittently.

____

_I wonder what it will be like, having the baby. Byakuya said it won't be as painful as a woman's delivery. I guess I'm not scared about that, although I am kind of scared of having someone little who depends on me for things. I mean, there'll be attendants, so it won't be too bad. It's just thinking of someone so little and helpless…_

____

He sighed softly and closed his eyes.

____

_It'll be a little strange at first, but I'm sure I'll get used to it. And Byakuya will be there too. I'm sure he'll be a hands on kind of parent. He seems thrilled…well, as thrilled as a guy like Byakuya gets…at the idea of having a baby to care for. Grandma's going to be on top of the world, yeah. I wonder if she'll come and stay for awhile when the baby comes. I wonder what Byakuya would think of her moving in with us. We didn't have much time for talking after the wedding. We were too busy all night, drinking and consummating._

____

_Oh my god, did we ever seal the deal._

____

_Ironclad._

____

_I feel kind of guilty, but if he had been here when I woke up, I would have been all over him again…and again. I love his body. He smells so good and his skin is so soft and warm all over. I like running my hand over his naked bottom bottom, kissing those soft lips and making them smile. I love how it feels when he puts that hard, passionate part of himself inside me. Gods, I never thought something like that would feel so good…and when he fills me inside with that white heat_ …

____

Toshiro felt a burgeoning ache rising in his loins and scowled down at his hardening penis.

____

"He's not here!" Toshiro hissed, "Stop it!"

____

He sat up, taking deeper breaths and trying to change the direction of his thoughts. But the sensual thoughts of his husband teased him mercilessly, making his swollen cock throb painfully as pearly, wanton droplets leaked from the flushed head. He clenched his teeth and climbed out of bed, hoping that the chill of the morning would relieve him.

____

_Oh, but I've slept for half the day. I needed to after spending most of the night making love._

____

_Damn!_

____

The twinges in his loins grew to a painful searing ache. Toshiro let out a disgusted breath and retrieved his yukata from within the tangled bedding.

____

_I can't believe this. He's turned me into a sex addict. I can't even control my own damned body!_

____

He stomped into the bathroom and locked the door, then turned on the water and waited for it to warm. He stepped in under the hot spray and leaned against the wall, breathing slowly and trying to calm his riled body. But the throbbing continued, especially when his roiling mind remembered suddenly how several times during the night, Byakuya had pleasured him with his mouth. As soon as the thought struck, the entrancing image of the proud Kuchiki leader, naked and bowed between Toshiro's wantonly spread thighs, those smiling lips wrapped around his slick, leaking cock and that sinful tongue sliding up and down the piqued shaft, he felt a gripping twinge and he bent forward, panting softly.

____

_This is insane…_

____

But the wild, crazy, sensual thoughts had him in their grip. He could almost see Byakuya, stripped naked and sliding down his body, trailing hot, wet kisses, then honing in on his hungry, insatiable penis and attacking with equal desire. He could feel his fingers sinking into Byakuya's soft, wet hair, encouraging him as he rose and fell on his husband's thrusting member, providing tantalizing friction and heavy suction until Toshiro could take it no more and surrendered, feeding Byakuya's wanton mouth with an explosion of hot, pale semen the noble eagerly devoured.

____

_I know this isn't real. Why can I feel so strongly…his fingers digging into my inner thighs, his smiling mouth wrapped around my cock, and why can I see those bottomless eyes teasing me, because he knows I can't resist him? My head knows I'm here alone, just pleasuring myself, but my heart feels Byakuya here. He's out there doing whatever needs to be done, but a part of him is still here and feeding this insatiable hunger I feel for him. I even smell his scent like he's really here._

____

_Is he?_

____

Toshiro stiffened as he thought he heard a footstep, then another, then a shadow appeared outside the misty shower.

____

_Oh my god! I thought he left._

____

Toshiro turned away, blushing at how obvious it was that he was aroused and pretty obvious, too, what he was doing besides showering. He shivered a little as the shower door opened and tried to look unsurprised as Byakuya joined him.

____

"I uh…thought you left hours ago," he said, trying to sound unaffected.

____

"I did," the Kuchiki leader purred into his ear, nipping as his earlobe as he pressed forward, trapping his husband against the wall, "I met with the Kuchiki elders and Soutaichou, and I was busily seeing to the rebuilding of the sixth division, but I sensed your riled reiatsu teasing me, even from there. I saw you, as though I was standing in front of you...saw you aching for me to touch you, your hand wrapped around that wanton part of you..."

____

"You couldn't have felt it from so far away," Toshiro scoffed playfully, turning his head away and tilting it to offer the damp flesh of his vulnerable throat, "and even if you did, you were busy trying to get things together at work. You shouldn't just be taking off to go and…to go and…"

____

"Make love to my new husband, whose desire spoke to me from so far?" Byakuya growled, rubbing his stiff penis up against him and making him moan scandalously, "You look tormented and…"

____

He teased Toshiro's slim thigh with his alert privates.

____

"You torment me too. Your insatiable desire ignites my own."

____

"So, it's my fault you couldn't concentrate," Toshiro snickered, "I feel terrible!"

____

"I see exactly how penitent you are," Byakuya said, smirking and sliding a wet hand down to caress his fully blossomed erection.

____

"You know you don't have to do that. I'm hard enough and…"

____

Toshiro gasped in shock as Byakuya slid down his body, trailing kisses, just as he had in the younger man's longing vision. He smelled even sweeter and looked even more beautiful than Toshiro had imagined, dropping onto his knees and wrapping those soft, smiling lips around his burgeoning arousal, doing something that he imagined the proud leader of the Kuchiki clan shouldn't ever be doing. His mouth felt a hundred times warmer and more silken, his lips a million times more tender. They slid up and down the slick shaft of Toshiro's thrusting penis, offering every bit of the delicious friction and tantalizing suction he had desired.

____

_Ah, I won't be able to fool myself ever again after this. As good as just the thought of him is, the reality of Byakuya's love is far, far better. And to think he sensed my hunger for him from so far away and dropped everything to come and make love to me. After so many times last night, I don't know how either of us has the energy._

____

Byakuya's voracious lips and biting mouth brought Toshiro nearly to the ends of his wits before the Kuchiki leader stood and pushed him back against the wall, lifting one of Toshiro's legs and wrapping it firmly around his waist. He pushed the blushing head of his thickened member into Toshiro's wet entrance, gazing deeply into the younger man's widened eyes as he entered in slow, deliberate thrusts.

____

_Both of us have lived in loneliness for too long. We know what it's like to wonder if love would ever find us, if we would ever feel something so powerful as this, if we would ever have a family…so many things. I think that's why…why we make love so vigorously and so often. We know exactly what a gift it is, and how quickly good things can disappear. We long for our future and we walk towards it hopefully, but we don't dare take it for granted._

____

"Toshiro!"

____

_The way he calls my name during sex tells me just how much this is making him feel. I feel like that too._

____

He moved his hips eagerly to meet each of Byakuya's hard, grinding thrusts.

____

_I love you!_

____

_I love you Byakuya._

____

_OH! OH FUCK! I live for you…would die for you…only for you…my…_

____

"Byakuya!" he gasped, clawing at his husband's strong shoulders as his body surrendered to the heavy shudders of a gripping orgasm.

____

He was grateful for the sudden kiss that stifled his scream of completion as Byakuya's body seized for a moment, then filled him with an eruption of deliciously scathing heat. The two men slid to the floor of the shower together and sat under the hot spray, kissing each other lazily and resting comfortably.

____

"This is becoming an addiction," Toshiro said penitently.

____

Byakuya nodded and sighed.

____

"We may require therapy."

____

"No," Toshiro snapped instantly.

____

Then, he realized that Byakuya was smiling at him.

____

"I was joking."

____

He ran his fingers through the wild spikes of Toshiro's white hair, looking down at their now flaccid and resting members.

____

"I never dreamed that love, or anything else could do this to me," Byakuya whispered in his ear, "I love you, Toshiro."

____

"I love you too."

____

"You have made that clear. Thank you."

____

Byakuya looked up and sighed again more wearily.

____

"I suppose we should dress and go have lunch with Grandma," he suggested.

____

He helped the younger man to his feet and the two left the shower and dried off. Byakuya paused as the two were dressing.

____

"Toshiro," he inquired, "what exactly is your grandmother's name?"

____

"What did she tell you to call her?" his husband asked.

____

"Grandma," Byakuya answered.

____

Toshiro shrugged.

____

"Then, it's just Grandma."

____


	13. The Life I Dreamed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toshiro finally confesses the reason he married Byakuya, to his Grandmother.

_I used to dream about something like this_ , Toshiro thought as his yukata dropped to the floor and his attendant dressed him in a beautiful kimono of mingled sky blue and snowy white, fastening it in place with a band of fine silver at the waist. He studied the tumble of white spikes of his hair and considered for a moment, only to have Byakuya, who was being dressed beside him give him a look that clearly said, _Don't you dare change it!_ His lips smiled as he watched the attendant calm the strands to make the look softer, while keeping his own familiar style.

He turned his attention to his husband, watching as Torio's practiced hands wrapped silken folds of burgundy and hunter green around the Kuchiki leader's slender frame. He took his time brushing Byakuya's long hair until it shone, then worked in the hair decorations.

_Byakuya shortened his hair after the Winter War. We all changed a little as we tried to grow stronger. I think he was glad he lost his old haori in Hueco Mundo, even though Yamamoto soutaichou yelled at him for it. The new one he had made is much more his style. Better material, more suited to his shape. He takes good care of that and the oken clothing he was given by Squad Zero on the order of the soul king. He told me that he made a promise to Yamamoto never to disrespect these things he is privileged to have, as a leader of men. I think Byakuya only made that promise to please his grandfather's old friend, but he keeps his uniform in perfect order and has it repaired immediately if it is damaged._

_Yeah, it seems like it's more about the people he cares about, than the things. People are what matter to Byakuya, even if he doesn't always say it with words. Sometimes, you don't need words. Like right now. He's stealing glances at me out of the corner of his eye and I can feel how much he'd like to be right back in that bed, making love to me. Damn, if we didn't have to go back and take care of business._

Toshiro turned his attention to the image in the mirror in front of them.

_Byakuya looks like the prince he is. I don't know if I do. I mean, when we were coming here to the Rukongai and people were lined up, watching us go by, I heard them say I did. I don't know if I feel princely. It's a little hard to feel regal when you and everyone else knows you came from the Rukongai and you've married into a noble family._

He noticed suddenly that the attendants had moved away and Byakuya was watching him silently.

"Sorry," he mumbled, blushing, "I guess I just let my mind wander."

"About what?" Byakuya asked, moving closer and embracing him.

"Ah," he said, self-consciously, "I don't know. I guess I was thinking of how you look like a noble prince."

He was shocked at how easily Byakuya read the unspoken remainder of his thoughts.

"You wonder if you look like you belong," Byakuya said, turning him so that both men were looking at his reflection, "You are aware that everyone knows you were not born into a noble family, but were a prodigy who earned a place of honor in the Gotei 13. For the ones like you, who also grew up in the Rukongai, you embody the little dream they have of being chosen to cross over and join a noble family. To your noble peers, you are a bit of a mystery that makes them ask, _Why you? What is so special about that man that he could win the heart of the cold Kuchiki prince_.

"Heh," Toshiro laughed, "bullshit."

Byakuya arched an eyebrow and gave him a questioning look.

"I meant about you being cold," he laughed, "I'm the one who almost froze you to death. I don't have a problem staying warm when we're together."

He nuzzled Byakuya's cheek, considering their reflection.

"The part about it being everyone's dream is fair enough. I think people like me who come from the Rukongai equate being rich with having an easy life. I know the reality isn't like that. I think most people do. It's just that, you know, the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. Still, there are a lot of good things about being asked to join a noble family. For one thing, I feel spoiled to death, having someone bathe and dress me, and having anything I want brought to me if I just ask. It's sometimes a little overwhelming."

"And yet, you do not let this change the spirited, fiercely self-reliant person you are. You use the conveniences of nobility, yet you shift easily back to doing things for yourself when there are no attendants to do things for you. You are adaptable, and that is something that will make you successful in settling into this life."

"You don't think in ten years, I'll be yelling at Torio for not making the bath water warm enough or not getting my amanatto to me quickly enough?"

Byakuya huffed out an amused breath.

"I think not."

He paused, considering his words for a moment.

"Hisana once asked me why, out of all people, I would choose a simple girl from the low Rukongai to be my wife."

"And what did you tell her?"

"I told Hisana that I am drawn to people who can take something dark and brighten it, who can look into despair and find that flicker of hope. I love those who can take the shattered pieces of an imperfect life and raise themselves. Those people are not born into wealth or nobility, but they make the most of what they do have."

Toshiro froze in place, his lips smiling as Byakuya's eyes looked deeply into his.

"You are a very different person than Hisana," he acknowledged, "and yet, you have that same beautiful spark of life, that battered, but unrelenting determination to make the most of things. That is what drives my affection for you."

He smiled and patted the more pronounced bump on Toshiro's belly that his clothing could barely hide anymore.

"That," he continued, "and this miracle you are carrying inside you."

"Yeah," Toshiro said, blushing more brightly, "We should probably go and tell Grandma about the baby before I just have the kid."

Byakuya gave him a measured look.

"That sounds like something you might enjoy doing privately," he suggested.

"What? Why? I mean, we're married. It's a package deal now. There's nothing I need to say that you can't hear."

"It is not that," Byakuya assured him, "It is just that you and Grandma only really had each other for a long time. It seems fitting that you share this particular moment alone together. I have plenty of things waiting to be done anyway."

"What about lunch?" Toshiro asked.

Byakuya kissed him on the cheek, then lingeringly on the lips.

"I know I grew up privileged," he said, smirking, "but I am capable of fending for myself. I will be back tonight for dinner and then we will ride back to Sakura no Kaiyou."

"See you tonight, then."

Toshiro was surprised and more than a little touched as he caught a look Byakuya gave their attendants before he exited the room.

_He was telling them to take care of me. He didn't want to insinuate I can't take care of myself, but we both know it's an uncertain world, and dangerous things happen unexpectedly. He doesn't want anything to threaten the dream we have going here._

"Will there be anything else, Toshiro-sama?" Akio asked, stepping back into the room.

"No thanks," Toshiro answered, heading out the door, "I'm just going to have lunch with Grandma and maybe take a walk with her."

"Enjoy your afternoon, sir," Akio said, bowing as he passed.

Toshiro walked towards the kitchen, breathing in the pleasant scents of cooking food and his stomach rumbling noisily. He was nearly there when he spotted Tetsuya, sitting in the garden next to a kneeling Arashi. As he moved closer, Byakuya's cousin sensed his approach and turned his head away slightly, reaching up with a hand to brush at his concealed eyes.

_Is he crying?_

"Hey Tetsuya, are you okay?" he asked.

Tetsuya kept his eyes lowered as he turned his head back in Toshiro's direction.

"I am fine, Toshiro-sama," he answered quietly, "Is there something I can do for you?"

"I'm good," Toshiro assured him, "but I'd like to help you, if there's something I can do."

"It's all right," Tetsuya said uncertainly, "It's nothing, really. I just had a quarrel with Ichigo. We'll work things out. You needn't trouble yourself. I'm sorry I disturbed you."

Toshiro left the walkway and headed out across the grass, pausing as he reached Tetsuya, to pat Arashi on the neck. The stallion's head turned and he nuzzled Toshiro's hand, then sniffed at his barely hidden baby bump.

"You didn't disturb me," Toshiro said firmly, "Look, Tetsuya, I know we're still getting to know each other, but we are cousins now. If that orange-haired idiot was rude to you and you're too nice to be rude back to him, I'll be happy to scold him for you. I don't have a problem yelling back at people who upset me."

"I've noticed that," Tetsuya admitted, s little smile touching the corners of his mouth, "Toshiro-sama stands up for himself in a way I just can't seem to. I try, but it's not in my heart to shout or swear."

"That's not a bad thing," Toshiro chuckled, "Ichigo and I are the ones with bad manners. And if I know that fool like I think I do, I'd say that it was him being rude that upset you."

"W-well, yes, actually," Tetsuya confessed.

"What did he say to you?"

"He wasn't rude to me exactly," Tetsuya answered, "He yelled at Hanataro, who was at his family's estate treating Ganju for illness. Hanataro somehow got in Ichigo's way and Ichigo was in a bad mood because he doesn't like some of the rules he has to follow as heir. He pushed Hanataro aside and told him to get out of the way. Hanataro is my friend too, and even if he wasn't, I have great respect for healers, because when I was a prisoner, healing power was all that we were allowed. The ones of us who could relieve pain for the others were deeply appreciated. I understand that people in the military look down on healers and think they are weak, but I know the gift that a healer is, when one is in pain."

"Yeah, I know," Toshiro sighed, shaking his head, "I have to admit I'm guilty of yelling at Hanataro once or twice too, but I wouldn't try to defend it. I know it's wrong, and I think Ichigo does also. He probably was a little embarrassed that he did something mean in front of you. So, he got mad and yelled at you instead. He's like that. I should know. I'm like that too sometimes. But, it doesn't mean that he doesn't love you."

"I know that, at least in my head. But maybe because I went through so many years with people telling me how undeserving I was of love, I have trouble putting my faith in Ichigo's love. A part of me is afraid he will decide I'm not worth the trouble, and he'll leave me."

"That's never going to happen," Ichigo's voice spoke out from behind them.

Tetsuya stiffened and turned to face Ichigo, then made a sound of surprise as Toshiro stepped between them.

"What are you doing here, Shiba Ichigo?" he asked, crossing his arms.

Ichigo gave him a confused look.

"I'm here to talk to my fiancé," he answered, "That okay with you?"

Toshiro strode forward, stopping still in between the two and looking into Ichigo's eyes.

"Tetsuya is a nice person, and he's my family. You respect him or I'll make you sorry you didn't," he snapped, glaring at the ginger-haired Shiba heir.

"Yeah, sorry Toshiro."

"You should apologize to Tetsuya," Toshiro said sharply, "And that's Kuchiki-Hitsugaya taichou to you!"

He flash stepped away, leaving the other two young men staring after him. Tetsuya and Ichigo exchanged a stymied look, then both let out soft chuckles of amusement.

"Kuchiki-Hitsugaya taichou?" Ichigo repeated, "Who can even say that without tripping over their tongue?"

Ichigo took a breath and coaxed Tetsuya into a warm embrace.

"Sorry," he apologized, "I shouldn't have yelled at Hanataro and I shouldn't have yelled at you. You're right. He was there helping Ganju and I was rude. Then, I made it worse by being mean to you. I know I shouldn't yell at you, because it sets off your anxiety from being a prisoner before. I'm just…hotheaded, and I speak before I think sometimes."

"I know what you're like," Tetsuya replied, "I wasn't planning on leaving you. I was just going somewhere quiet to let you cool down and to get my emotions under control so that we could talk."

"Good," Ichigo said, hugging him and kissing him on the cheek, "Cause I love you, Tetsuya. I'm sorry I made you cry."

"I am fine now, thank you," Tetsuya assured him, kissing him back.

Concealed within one of the rooms nearby, Toshiro watched until the two began kissing more amorously, then he continued on to where his grandmother waited in the kitchen.

He found his grandmother sitting at the table and Chinami putting the final touches on their meal. He took a seat across from her, digging into his food eagerly, as soon as it was set in front of him.

"Byakuya decided not to stay for lunch?" Grandma asked.

"He, ah, had to go back for some meetings," Toshiro explained around a heaping mouthful of his food, "And I wanted to talk to you. I need to tell you something."

"What is it, Shiro-chan?" the old woman asked, falling back on her old way of referring to him as she sensed the seriousness in his manner.

"It's nothing bad," he assured her, taking a steadying breath, "It's just that, things are a little complicated between Byakuya and me."

His grandmother smiled warmly.

"I can see that you and Byakuya are very much in love," she acknowledged.

"Yeah, we are," Toshiro agreed, "We are now. But how we got that way is a little bit of a story."

"It always is, dear," Grandma said, laying a hand on his.

"It's crazy, really," he said, shaking his head, "Neither one of us was expecting anything like this to happen."

"What did happen, Shiro-chan?" the old woman asked curiously.

"Ah, it…when Byakuya and I were involved in the war, we were just comrades. We liked and respected each other, but we weren't interested in each other romantically."

"I remember you telling me when you became a taichou, how you and Byakuya seemed to get along well."

"Yeah, he's always been polite to me and we respect each other's fighting ability. We were up in the royal realm and fighting this extremely difficult quincy, who kept regenerating."

"He sounds like a monster."

"He was," Toshiro sighed, "We were exhausted and the quincy just kept getting back up again. So, finally, I had to use my completed bankai, which like I told you, made me take this older form. And after Byakuya, Kenpachi and I together used our most powerful attacks, we seemed to win. The quincy actually broke into pieces and we thought it was over. I began to be overcome and Byakuya saw it and he put a hand on me to stop me from falling."

"Oh my," Grandma said, her expression hinting that she understood the direction things were taking, "You power affected him? Like when you were younger and your powers were new and they chilled me a bit?"

"Uh-huh," Toshiro confirmed anxiously, "After Ywach was defeated, we limped to the healing center and I collapsed into a bed. Byakuya was helping with my healing and my power affected him more. By the time we came back to Soul Society, he was having chills and starting to freeze to death. We, of course, got help from Urahara Kisuke."

"He's a brilliant man," Grandma noted.

"Yeah, he was going to use a machine of his to correct the problem, but quincies broke into his lab and wrecked everything before we could get there. I went to my inner world and I found out that Hyorinmaru was also affecting Byakuya's Senbonzakura, but they had found a way to fix the problem."

"Were you able to cure poor Byakuya?" the old woman asked, "He looked perfectly well, though a bit tired today."

"We cured him," Toshiro answered, his face blushing brightly as he approached his explanation, "But, um…the cure required us to…"

He paused, looking down at his half-finished lunch.

"Erm, we had to…ah…Grandma, Byakuya and I had to have sexual intercourse to balance our reiatsu!" he forced out, stiffening.

"Oh," Grandma replied, looking stymied for a moment.

Both were silent for several uncomfortable minutes before Toshiro calmed enough to go on.

"You know about the way some nobles can impregnate males?"

"Yes, dear, you mentioned that before."

"Byakuya gave me a protection charm."

He paused, trying to make his voice sound and failing miserably.

"Let me guess," Grandma said cheerfully, her blue eyes lighting, "It failed?"

"Yeah," Toshiro admitted, cringing, "and so, because I am carrying Byakuya's baby, we had to get married. Neither of us really wanted to, at first, but we were going to anyway. Then…we just fell completely in love. I don't know how it happened. Just, one minute, I was scared to death of having to marry him and follow all of those rules. I was scared the elders would be mad. In the middle of all of that, we found this feeling growing. And even though we weren't in love before, we are now, and we are looking forward to having this baby."

Grandma looked back at Toshiro for a moment, her eyes sparkling.

"I'm looking forward to this child's birth also, Shiro-chan. This is a beautiful, wonderful little miracle. I am so happy for both of you!"

She looked out the window, in the direction of the little footbridge where Byakuya and Toshiro had taken their vows.

"You know, Byakuya, though he can be stern, is a very lovely and kind man."

"Yeah, he is," Toshiro agreed.

"He asked me to come and live with you when you return to Kuchiki Manor," she admitted, making Toshiro's eyes widen.

"He did?"

"He did," Grandma said, standing and moving to embrace him.

Toshiro sat back slightly, revealing his baby bump and watching with a smile as his grandmother's hand caressed the bump gently.

"Toshiro," she said in a softer voice, "you have married a true prince. Not just a man of noble blood, but one with a noble heart. I think you and Byakuya will be very happy."

"Yeah," Toshiro sighed, "I think we will."


	14. No Moments Wasted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While awaiting Byakuya's return, Toshiro suffers an unexpected setback.

Toshiro sat in a garden swing, one leg curled beneath him and the other hanging down, with toes extended, pushing the swing to move it, while he watched his grandmother and her attendant happily tending a colorful array of roses. He breathed slowly, savoring the quiet.

_It's going to be chaos, going back. Byakuya warned me that it will be more crowded than when we came down for the wedding. We'll be riding Ikazuchi and Tetsuya will have a full noble guard unit around us. It's gonna be crazy._

"Are you all right, Shiro-chan?" Grandma asked suddenly.

Toshiro blinked in surprise at the question.

"Fine, I guess," he answered, biting at his lip and rubbing his baby bump absently, "I'm just a little nervous about how crowded and loud it will be, going back."

Grandma smiled.

"You know that Byakuya said it would be fine to delay the trip for another day or two, if you are not up to it now."

"Eh, better to go now, I suppose," Toshiro sighed, his lips pouting slightly, "The babies are only going to get bigger, and I'll keep having nausea and dizziness. It's all normal. It's just that when I'm in a crowd, everything feels worse."

"Well," the old woman said, brushing her hands on her apron, "there is still plenty of time to go and take a nap before you leave."

"I can dress you quickly, when it is time to go," Akio chimed in from behind him, "Grandma is right. You look rather pale."

"I _always_ look pale," Toshiro said irascibly, "I'm fine. I just…wish we were already back at Sakura no Kaiyou."

"You're just anxious, dear," Grandma chuckled, "Why don't you let Akio-kun make you some tea?"

"Ah, hell, fine!" the young man grumbled, "I'll have some tea and a nap, even though I won't be able to sleep at all."

He started to climb off the swing, then felt a strong, radiating pain go through his insides. He heard garbled voices around him, but the light seemed to have faded and a cloudiness fell over his vision. He put a hand to his throbbing belly and managed to hiss out Akio's name. He remained conscious long enough to feel his attendant's arm wrap around him, then everything went quiet and deep grey.

_Like Byakuya's eyes._

He drifted in and out of awareness, registering the feeling of his senseless body being lifted and briefly hearing familiar voices.

" _I'll go and bring Byakuya-sama!" Torio's voice said urgently, "Akio, stay with him!"_

He felt Tetsuya's soft hands touch his face and loosen his clothing.

" _I know what this is. We need to take him to Urahara-san immediately!"_

Toshiro felt his body being lifted again, and carried to where he sensed Arashi's strong presence.

Tetsuya climbed onto the stallion and waited as Toshiro was handed into his arms. He set kido bindings to hold him in place, then nudged the stallion into a dead run.

" _It will be all right, Toshiro-sama," Tetsuya assured him as he guided the galloping horse into the precipice world, "I am sure that Urahara-san will be able to help you."_

Toshiro tried to answer, but couldn't make his mouth move. A strange, tingly feeling ran over his unmoving body, and he felt another strong pain.

_Oh god, this is really bad, isn't it?_

He could still feel the slow intake and exhale of his breaths, so he focused on that and the little flicker of the babies' vibrant souls.

_What happened?_

_I was tired and cross, but I didn't feel like anything was wrong. The pain was sudden and sharp. It almost immediately overwhelmed me. And for all that Tetsuya is telling me it will be okay, I know it's serious. If it wasn't, he would have sent for a healer instead of moving me. What is this? Why is this happening?_

He felt Tetsuya's hand rubbing the baby bump and the slow infusion of a small amount of reiatsu into the area.

"My reiatsu is not as effective as that of the babies' father," Tetsuya's voice said, clearing somewhat in Toshiro's spinning mind, "but it will sustain you until we can get you to Karakura Town."

"Wh-what's happening?" Toshiro managed, cracking his eyes open for a moment and taking the worried look on Tetsuya's determined face, "Am I going to lose the babies?"

"Please try not to worry about that," Tetsuya answered soothingly, "Urahara-san is the best, handling this sort of thing. You and the babies are strong. You will be all right."

"But, what's…what's wrong?"

The light became blinding as the stallion reached the exit point, and the senkaimon opened into Urahara's underground training room. They burst through, and Arashi skidded to a stop as flash steps sounded, and Kisuke appeared, alongside Tessai.

"The shop's still a mess," Kisuke said quickly, "Bring him over here."

The kido holding Toshiro on the horse shattered and Tetsuya handed him quickly down into Tessai's strong arms. He was carried to a cot that had been set up next to a jumble of computers and monitors.

"You're lucky not everything was destroyed," the shopkeeper muttered, "otherwise, this would be a lot harder."

"What is it? What's happening?" Toshiro demanded weakly, his ears beginning to ring loudly again.

Kisuke looked down into his hazy eyes and nodded.

"The spirit chamber has to expand a bit as the babies' reiatsu matures and swells some. The amount of swelling and the position of the spirit chamber can interfere with your spirit core. Multiple reiatsus complicate things even more. I just need to create space between the two."

"S-surgery?" Toshio stammered, shivering at the sudden icy feeling that penetrated his chest.

"It's gonna be okay," the shopkeeper assured him, glancing over his shoulder, "Tetsuya, I want you over here, by me. Infuse the area while I work. As soon as Byakuya arrives, have him take that part over."

"Hai," Tetsuya answered hastily.

Toshiro's eyes began to cloud up again, and the last thing he saw was an oxygen mask being placed over his face.

"Just relax now. Everything's going to be okay," Kisuke promised.

But he couldn't believe it enough to let himself drop off until Byakuya's flash step sounded, and his husband's scent reached him.

" _Anata_."

_He's scared._

_Byakuya is scared._

He could feel that the hand that took hold of his was shaking.

_I know why. He already watched his wife, Hisana, die in front of him. I'll be damned if I am gonna do that to him again. I just have to hang on…breathe…heart has to beat. And you…you, little ones, you're staying with me._

He began to fade out, only catching small bits of the hushed conversations going on around him.

" _...reached sentience. The clan considers the life of the heirs over…"_

" _I don't care!" Byakuya exclaimed, "The consequences don't matter. You keep Toshiro alive!"_

" _But he could…"_

" _I know."_

Toshiro was sure he had never heard Byakuya's voice sound so emotional.

" _He may hate me. I will take the risk. I love him too much to let him die when he can be saved."_

" _And your baby?" Kisuke asked sympathetically._

" _You know this is killing me," Byakuya managed more softly, "You have to try to save them both."_

" _I don't know if I can."_

" _THEN, FIND A GODDAMNED WAY!"_

" _Wait," Tetsuya interjected, "There may be a way I can help. Toshiro and I both command water and ice. I can mingle our reiatsu and try to alter the position of the spirit chamber that way."_

" _What do you think?" Byakuya asked quickly, "Kisuke, will it work?"_

" _I don't know," Kisuke said anxiously._

" _Tetsuya, quickly!"_

Toshiro sank back down into blackness for a time, losing track of everything but the sound of his heart that continued a slow, steady beating. When he opened his eyes again, he found himself warmly tucked into Kurosaki Ichigo's bed. He blinked in surprise at the realization and turned his head to find Byakuya curled up against his side.

"Byakuya," he whispered.

His husband's eyes opened, and instantly, he spotted the signs of intense worry, red eyes, weary features and a very slight tremor in the arms that held him.

"You are awake," Byakuya whispered sleepily, running his fingers through the long, white strands of Toshiro's hair, "I wondered how long it would be."

"How long was it?" he asked, dreading the question both men knew he had to ask.

"You've been asleep for nearly a week," Byakuya answered.

"And I'll bet you haven't slept a wink," Toshiro accused him gently.

"I slept some of the time," Byakuya assured him.

Toshiro took a steadying breath.

"The babies?" he asked, closing his eyes.

"Alive," Byakuya answered, curving a warm palm around Toshiro's pale face, "We almost lost both you and the babies. If not for Tetsuya's sacrifice…"

"His sacrifice?" Toshiro asked, sitting up.

"Move slowly," Byakuya chided him.

"But, Tetsuya!"

"He is all right," Byakuya assured his anxious husband, "It is just that he mingled your reiatsu and attempted to reposition the spirit chamber. He was successful, but the strain on his body was horrific. He has been unconscious ever since. Urahara Kisuke is caring for him at Sakura no Kaiyou, because he was stable enough to move. Ichigo offered to let you recuperate here, because we did not dare move you any farther."

"I must've been dying for Ichigo not to make a fuss about me stealing his bedroom," Toshiro chuckled, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck.

He looked down at his notably larger belly and grinned.

"So, you're still with us, eh? Good, because I wasn't going to let you go anywhere."

"And I was not letting you go anywhere," Byakuya added, nuzzling his cheek, "You gave me a terrible scare, _anata_. I thought I was going to lose all of you."

"I know," Toshiro acknowledged, turning his face into Byakuya's shoulder and breathing in his husband's sweet, calming scent, "I'm sorry."

"You did not do a thing wrong."

"Are you sure?" Toshiro asked, guilt spreading through his insides, "There has to be some reason this happened."

"The problem of the spirit chamber interfering with a male shinigami's spirit core is common among the breeder males. In fact, in addition to injury, this is why Tetsuya lost his child many years ago."

Byakuya sighed and hugged Toshiro tightly against him.

"I think that the memory of that pain is what made my cousin so desperate to help you. If the loss of his own child could save yours, then maybe some of his pain from the past could be shed more easily. Tetsuya did not want to see you carry that pain. I would not want you to suffer that kind of pain. I am glad that Tetsuya could help you. I am glad that you, Tetsuya and the babies are all going to be fine."

"We _are_ going to be all right now," Toshiro assured his nervous partner, "You can stop worrying so much."

"Do not be ridiculous, _anata_ ," Byakuya chided him, kissing him on the neck and nipping at his earlobe, "I will _always_ be concerned about what happens to you and our children."

"I worry about you too," Toshiro admitted, "I'm glad you care, but I'm not used to seeing you look afraid of anything. Not even that big quincy bastard, Gerard."

"I fear plenty of things," Byakuya confessed softly, "But most of all, I fear losing the second chance that I have been given with you."

"We're not going to lose this," Toshiro promised, reaching down to rub his baby bump, "We're going to be okay."

He gave a longer sigh and burrowed into Byakuya's strong shoulder again.

"Grandma's probably pretty worried," he said a moment later, "We should get word back to her that the babies and I are all right."

"It is already done," Byakuya assured him, "I sent Akio back to inform her, as soon as Kisuke said that you and the babies were out of danger. He has gone and returned. Torio and Akio are here, and will see to any needs we have."

Byakuya paused as footsteps sounded on the stairs outside of Ichigo's bedroom.

"Kuchiki-san, I've brought lunch for you," Yuzu's friendly voice called out as the girl tapped on the bedroom door, then entered bearing a tray loaded with food.

She skidded to a stop, staring at Toshiro for a moment.

"Shiro-chan is awake!" she shouted, "Karin-chan, Shiro-chan is awake!"

"It's Kuchiki-Hitsugaya taichou!" Toshiro snapped.

"Kuchiki-Hitsugaya taichou," Karin repeated, peeking in through the door at the two men, "Who can even say that?"

She looked at Toshiro more closely and shook her head.

"Man, I just can't get used to you being pregnant like a girl," she snickered.

"I'm not pregnant like a girl!" Toshiro shouted, earning an amused look from Byakuya, who had accepted the food tray from Yuzu, and was attempting to get his fuming spouse to notice his offer to share, "I'm a guy, and there's no mistaking that!"

"It is good to see you in such high spirits so shortly after waking up," the Kuchiki leader said in a relieved tone, "But you should try to remain a bit calmer. The excitement is not advisable just yet."

"Well then, they should stop provoking me," Toshiro said shortly, snapping at a bite of hot food his smirking partner offered him.

"Not like a pregnant girl, he says?" Karin said under her breath as she headed out of the room again, "Right."

"I can make you some food too, Shiro-chan," Yuzu offered, "It looks like you're as hungry as Kuchiki-san."

Toshiro arched an eyebrow at Byakuya.

"Kuchiki-san?" he repeated, "That's a little casual, isn't it?"

Byakuya shrugged.

"Given her hospitality and excellent cooking ability, I found I did not mind the informality."

"So, do you want a tray of your own, Shiro-chan?" Yuzu asked.

"Yeah," Toshiro said, smirking as he stole another bite from Byakuya's tray, "I'm starving!"

XXXXXXXXXX

Ichigo sat in a chair beside Tetsuya's bed, watching through worried eyes as Kisuke examined the unconscious shinigami, assisted by a concerned looking Hanataro. The two exchanged a few quiet words and Kisuke entered information into a file with Tetsuya's name on it.

"So?" he asked anxiously, "Kisuke, is he gonna wake up soon?"

"He does seem to be improving," Kisuke assured him, "His body just got a pretty good shock, connecting like that with Toshiro's to reposition the spirit chamber and stabilize everything. I think if it hadn't been for the similarity in their powers, and the compatibility of their reiatsu, we'd be looking at a much less rosy situation."

"I don't think being out cold for a week counts as a rosy situation," Ichigo said unhappily.

"Hey, it beats him being dead, right?" the shopkeeper offered.

Ichigo looked from Kisuke to Hanataro, then back to Tetsuya's sleeping face again.

"Right," he agreed, "And uh, thanks for taking such good care of him, both of you."

"It's no problem," Hanataro said cheerfully, "I hope he wakes up soon. I know you've been anxious."

"He'll be okay, Ichigo," Kisuke said reassuringly.

"Yeah, I know. I just want him to wake up."

"He will," Kisuke promised, "Just keep him comfortable, and as soon as those big blue eyes of his open, you start stuffing him with as much food as he'll eat."

"I will," Ichigo replied, leaning forward and resting his head on Tetsuya's shoulder as the two left the room.

He sighed sleepily and ran his fingers through the ginger spikes of his hair.

"I love you," he whispered, kissing Tetsuya's soft lips and caressing his cheek, "I love you so much. I'll be right here. I'm gonna stay right here with you, okay?"

Ichigo's breath caught and he felt a little burning in his eyes, when Tetsuya shifted in his sleep.

"Ichigo," he breathed sleepily.

"I'm right here," the Shiba heir answered quickly, squeezing his hand.

Tetsuya's wide blue eyes opened and struggled to focus on him.

"T-toshiro-sama?"

"He's all right," Ichigo answered, caressing Tetsuya's face, "Babies are okay too. Byakuya wanted you to know he's in your debt. What you did was really amazing. I'm just glad you came through it okay. Are you feeling all right now?"

Tetsuya nodded and curled closer to Ichigo.

"I'm just still sleepy," he yawned.

"Well, you've been asleep for a week already," Ichigo said, playing with the fluttering strands of his hair, "You've gotta be starving. I'll get you something to eat."

Tetsuya's hands tightened on Ichigo and he shook his head firmly.

"Stay with me?" he whispered, starting to drift off again.

"I will," Ichigo promised, "Tetsuya, when you wake up all of the way? I'm going to have your cousin marry us."


	15. Snow Angels

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Kuchiki heirs make their entrance!

Byakuya's calm grey eyes watched proudly as Tetsuya's longtime attendant put the final touches on his cousin's formal wedding kimono, then worked the tousled strands of Tetsuya's misbehaving hair into some semblance of order. Tetsuya made a flustered sound, struggling to remain still as Koji finished his efforts and stood back to observe the result.

"You look wonderful!" Koji said approvingly.

"He is right," Byakuya added, "You look very content, Cousin."

He moved closer, laying a warm palm on Tetsuya's soft cheek and making the skin blush in reaction.

"This is all that I ever wanted for you," the Kuchiki leader continued, "From the day I found you and brought you out of Itamigiri and into the light, you have only increased your shine. You do honor to our family, Tetsuya. I wish you every happiness in your marriage to Ichigo."

"How can I help but be happy?" Tetsuya managed, a slight tremor in his voice, "Ichigo is my closest friend, and to have won his heart so that he would honor our love this way is a dream come true."

"He will be a good husband to you. I know he will," Byakuya said, closing his eyes and smirking, "He will make you happy, or he will be answering to me."

"Oh, don't make me more nervous than I already am," Tetsuya laughed shakily, "I'm already worried I'll forget my vows."

"You'll do fine," Koji assured him, running a freshening cloth over his anxious cousin's pale face.

"I think everyone from both the Shiba clan and our own are here," Tetsuya fretted, "For ones who ignored me for the most part, over the years, they sure are paying close attention. But then, I suppose that comes with marrying the savior of Soul Society, and the Shiba clan's heir."

"Don't you think about any of that," Koji chided him gently, "Just look into Ichigo's eyes and speak directly to him. You'll do fine."

"You will," Byakuya added, nodding in agreement.

The three men looked up as Toshiro appeared in the doorway, dressed in a formal kimono and slightly out of breath.

"Th-they're ready for you now!" he panted, rubbing his rounded belly as he spoke, "It's time."

"Oh," Tetsuya managed, paling.

"It will be fine," Byakuya assured him, "Take a few deep breaths while Toshiro and I walk out and get into place."

Toshiro gave his husband an uncertain look as Byakuya took his hand and guided him out of the room and into the gardens, where a sea of guests waited.

"Are you sure he'll be all right?"

"Tetsuya will be fine," Byakuya insisted, "Koji is very good at helping him get his emotions under control in these situations. Come, we need to take our places."

The two men waited for the introductory music, then walked slowly down the aisle and moved to join Ichigo, where he waited with Rukia and Renji in front of the crowd of family and friends. The head elder of the Kuchiki family, Kuchiki Nori nodded in greeting and began to address the audience. Toshiro stood, quietly listening and continuing to rub his now more insistently aching belly.

_I've been having a lot of pains today, and some different flickers in my reiatsu. Michio had a look at me earlier, and he said that I'm getting close. From what he and Byakuya have told me, the abilities of the parents of a breeder male's child, have an effect on the maturation time of the reiatsu. This means that because Byakuya and I are both very powerful shinigamis with strong reiatsu, our children's reiatsu is developing at an accelerated rate. My stomach's gotten a lot bigger. I'm kind of glad that Byakuya reassured me that I won't get as big as a female bearing a child. I already feel pretty awkward._

_But…I also feel strangely happy all over._

_The war was really tough. A lot happened, both to me and to the worlds and the society I know. I will never completely get back to what I was before, and the three worlds have been changed too. But, since my powers went out of control and they brought Byakuya and these children into my life, I'm beginning to see that I was in a holding pattern before…not dying, but afraid to live. I stayed in child form, because I didn't want anything to change. I could point to the war as a reason that change is bad, but it's also inescapable that the most beautiful thing that has happened, could only happen because I did change._

_Byakuya and I both changed, and because of that, here we are._

_Before, Byakuya was kind of in a holding pattern too. He'd lost his parents and his wife, and he had ceased to imagine a future with his own spouse and children. Now, all of this has happened, and Byakuya seems to have so much more life in him. Apart, we were both standing still, passing time, lost. Together, we are loving, giving and passionate in ways we never were before. And the future isn't so vague, but looks bright and full of forward motion._

Toshiro's lips smiled as he watched Ichigo take Tetsuya's hands, and the two young men spoke their vows in front of a full contingent of Kuchiki and Shiab family members and friends.

_We're not the only ones who've been changed by the war. So many lives were touched…in some ways that were tragic, but in some ways that were also very good. The war opened Ichigo's eyes to Tetsuya's inner beauty, and gave them a wonderful future together too._

_I still do wish that Ywach had never existed, but I can accept and appreciate this world he tried to destroy, the world we saved with our blood and our sacrifices. Byakuya's and my children have a place and a future in this new reality, and I am going to do all I can to bring them up as happy and appreciative as I feel right now._

He felt Byakuya's hand touch his and looked up into his husband's quiet, proud eyes.

"Are you all right, _anata_?" Byakuya said softly, "You've gone pale."

"I'm okay," he assured his noble mate, "It's all of the people and excitement. When the wedding is over, I'll rest."

Byakuya nodded and turned his attention back to Ichigo and Tetsuya.

_I've never, in all of the years that I have known Tetsuya, seen him looking so happy, so contented, so alive,_ the noble mused, _What we have all suffered in the war was horrific, but we should not forget to still be grateful for the little blessings that have come of our struggles. Ichigo now knows the truth of his history, that was hidden from him for so long. And Tetsuya, who struggled to find his place within the noble families because of his mixed blood has shown that there is undeniable value in all of us, no matter the content of our blood. Our actions speak louder. Our choices define us. The sheer number of lives saved by just the actions of these two is mind boggling. I wish them every happiness._

Byakuya blinked, realizing suddenly that, first, the celebrant had stopped speaking, and secondly, that the sky had gone very unexpectedly grey, and a soft snow was falling. He heard Toshiro gasp out an apology, then a brightness flared around his younger husband that filled the eyes of the wedding couple and all of the guests, as well as those of the two about to become parents for the first time.

Byakuya smiled at Toshiro encouragingly, then lifted him off of his feet and into strong, warm arms. He stepped out into the aisle and carried his husband past the staring guests and back into the main house where, some two hundred forty years before, Byakuya, himself had been born.

"S-sorry about the snow," Toshiro panted breathlessly, "and making you miss the rest of the wedding."

Byakuya gave him a look of amusement.

"I think Ichigo and Tetsuya appreciate the little, memorable touch of beauty it brings to their joining. And I am more than willing to embrace the arrival of this moment with you."

He laid Toshiro in their bed and loosened his clothing as the aged Kuchiki healer arrived, alongside their house attendants. Michio examined Toshiro briefly, moving the folds of clothing to reveal his glowing white belly.

"Well, it seems like the heirs have decided to make their entrance now."

"I tried to convince them to wait," Toshiro laughed nervously, "but they seem to have minds of their own."

"Oh," Michigo said, smirking as he glanced from Byakuya to his snowy mate, "I wonder where they get that, because neither of you is the least bit willful, ne?"

"Where is Grandma?" Toshiro asked, looking around.

"Right here, my boy," the aged woman chuckled as she and Chinami entered the room through the garden doors, "It just took me a little longer to get over here. I didn't have a handsome prince to sweep me off my feet and carry me, like you did."

"I'm sure I could have walked," Toshiro said, blushing.

"Our progeny seemed insistent," Byakuya said, almost smiling, "I wasn't sure you would get here without having them, maybe out in the gardens."

"They don't come out that quickly, do they?" Toshiro asked, looking down at his protruding belly as Byakuya infused the area gently with his reiatsu.

"Not usually, no," Michio assured him.

The healer checked Toshiro's vital signs, then focused briefly on the area over the glowing spirit chamber.

"Ah, but these two will be making their entrance very shortly now. It will just take a few more minutes for the area over the spirit chamber to lose enough cohesion for the reiatsu to pass through. Byakuya-sama, if you will just keep gently feeding the area with your reiatsu, that will keep things nice and stable through the delivery."

Byakuya nodded wordlessly and rubbed Toshiro's belly affectionately.

"This feels weird," Toshiro panted, his chest heaving softly.

"Just breathe slowly," Byakuya's voice rumbled in his ear, helping him to focus, "Focus on taking a deep, slow breath…releasing. Take a deep, slow breath, and release it. You are doing well, _anata_."

"I'm not actually doing much, but lying here, trying to breathe like you say. It's more like the babies are doing the work."

"They are, at that," the old healer chuckled, "and it feels like they're excited about coming to join us. Their reiatsu is particularly vibrant."

"I feel it!" Toshiro panted, his eyes brightening.

He squeezed Byakuya's hand.

"Do you feel it too?" he asked.

"I do," Byakuya said approvingly, "Keep breathing steadily, Toshiro."

"R-right!" the white-haired man agreed.

The glow around his rounded belly slowly intensified to a brilliant golden, and Toshiro felt dizziness sweep over him as he felt pressure pushing from the inside of his body, as though it sought to come out.

"It f-feels like something's pushing against the inside of my s-stomach," he told the healer.

"That's exactly right," Michio explained, "the babies' reiatsu is rising up and pushing against the tissues as the cells lose cohesion."

"Does it hurt, Toshiro?" Byakuya asked curiously.

"N-no," his husband assured him, "It's really just pressure, not pain exactly."

"I'm going to test the birthing area," Michio warned him, running his hands around the edges of the glowing area, then slowly dipping his fingers inside.

After a few minutes checking the area, he nodded in approval.

The reiatsu should be able to pass through now," he informed the two waiting men, "Byakuya-sama, would you like to deliver your children?"

Toshiro felt a deep throb of affection at the sweet, surprised and enthralled look Byakuya gave the old man at the suggestion.

"Come closer," Michio urged him, "Place your hands here. Toshiro-sama, continue to breathe slowly and place your hands on the sides of your abdomen."

Toshiro followed the healer's instructions, while he watched in fascination as Byakuya's hands dipped into the glowing swirl in his belly.

_I've never seen such a beautiful, heartfelt expression on Byakuya's face,_ Toshiro mused, _It's like when Hisana died, some of the life went out of him. He lost a part of himself when he lost her. He always wanted to be a husband and a father, but he and Hisana never got to have this kind of miracle together, because she was so fragile and weak. It's really sad that such a thing happened to them, but I feel the healing that's going on right now, as he reaches with his own hands to make that dream come true._

_I've been healed by this too. Before the war, I didn't know what I wanted, except that I didn't want the world to change. I wanted everything to stay the same. I didn't want to grow up or fall in love or have a family of my own, and I suppose the reason why was because I'd lost my own parents. Not having them made me feel a longing for what could have been. Of course, I know I was very lucky to always have Grandma, but she couldn't take that place that my parents would have had. It's no one's fault. Accidents or shifts of fate are sometimes unavoidable._

_I guess what I've learned from all of this…is that while moving forward brings risk, it can also lead to great promise._

_Byakuya and I didn't have much choice about the resonance between us. We didn't choose for my power to strike him and put us in the position it did. But from that point when we first joined our bodies in a mutual effort to save his life, we began making choices that mattered. We chose to embrace the powerful urge to join again and again. We each chose to hold on instead of letting go. And when we learned that we were having the babies, we chose to take our unplanned future together, and to turn that into the birth of a new family._

_I did not feel ready to marry him. I didn't think I could possibly fit into a noble family. And I was surely not ready to have babies. Still, this quiet, formidable man beside me, inspired me to see him, our families, our children, and myself…differently. Now, the road stretches out ahead of us, and we step forward together…stronger for all that we've endured._

_It's…_

Toshiro's mind froze, and he stared raptly as Byakuya's hands wrapped around what looked like a clump of blazing light.

"Go slowly now," Michio advised the Kuchiki leader, "Lift gently."

Byakuya's hand rose, holding the little cluster of light and bringing it carefully out of his husband's trembling body. He held the cluster tenderly in his arms, and all of the ones gathered in the room watched in stunned silence as the light began to fade, and the cluster slowly resolved into the little, pink body of a baby boy. Neither Byakuya nor Toshiro could speak for a moment as they admired their son's wild swirl of raven black hair, his lovely aqua colored eyes and his perfect porcelain skin. The baby sucked in a breath and released it again in a sharp howl that seemed to clutch at his parents' insides, demanding their immediate attention.

"What a beautiful baby boy," Michio breathed appreciatively, "Did you have a name chosen for him?"

"We decided to wait to see what he looked like," Byakuya answered, glancing at Toshiro, "What do you think, _anata_?"

Toshiro looked into the baby boy's wide, blinking eyes, thinking carefully.

"You told me some stories once," Toshiro recalled, "when we were in the archive and you were reading the stories of the first descendants of Hajime, consort of the first incarnation of the soul king."

Byakuya nodded.

"You told me the story of one of the Kuchiki sons whose powers and commitment to duty led to him being called to serve in the royal realm at a very young age."

"Yes," Byakuya remembered, "that was Kuchiki Kazuki, who became the youngest shinigami called to directly serve in the soul king's fighting forces."

"And when he arrived in the royal realm, his life was saved by none other that the king's samurai, known as Katsuro. I always liked Kazuki's story and his name."

"Kazuki," Byakuya repeated in an approving tone as his son's tiny fingers reached for Byakuya's tenderly smiling face, "a very lovely, honorable and hopeful name. Kazuki it is."

Byakuya set their son in Toshiro's arms, then turned his attention back to his husband's still glowing belly.

"Again," like before," Michio advised him.

Byakuya took a steadying breath and dipped his hands into the brilliant swirl of light in his husband's glowing abdomen. He lifted carefully, and slowly coaxed out a second shining reiatsu cluster. He held it close, watching as the light faded to reveal a striking white-haired female with lovely, fine cut features and wild, almost feral grey eyes. Those eyes lit when they spotted Byakuya, and the baby girl squealed, making the lights in the room flicker.

"Goodness!" old Michio chuckled.

"She reminds me of Hyorinmaru," Toshiro laughed, brushing the sweat from his forehead as he cuddled their son. She's going to be a handful."

"I am sure she is," Byakuya said proudly, "What do you think of calling her Kaida?"

"Little dragon?" Toshiro inquired, grinning, "I think it's perfect."

"Kazuki and Kaida," Byakuya said happily, "welcome to the Hitsugaya and Kuchiki families."


	16. In Our Element

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Soul Society restored after the war, Byakuya and Toshiro embark on a new adventure, raising their children.

**(Six weeks later…)**

Toshiro felt the bed move, and he opened his eyes and found Byakuya sitting up in their bed and starting to climb out of it. He moved swiftly across the bed and wrapped his arms around his husband from behind, nipping at the back of his shoulder.

“Is it time to get up already?” he complained, “We were up pretty late with Kaida last night.”

Byakuya gave him an enigmatic smile.

“I think she kept you more awake than me,” he chuckled, “You’re welcome to sleep in, if you like. I can certainly take note of anything important in the Taicho’s meeting this morning, and we can meet to talk about it over lunch.”

“That’s a tempting offer,” Toshiro answered, smirking back at him, “and I’ll take you up on meeting for lunch, but I’m taking Kaida with me to headquarters this morning. I’m still on desk duty for a little longer, but I’m more than capable of handling paperwork. Besides, Matsumoto and Momo want to visit with her, which really means they want to spoil the daylights out of her and make her even more impossible. I can let them babysit while we’re at lunch.”

“That sounds good,” Byakuya said, turning and meeting him for a long, amorous kiss.

Toshiro grinned.

“You’d better not do that or we’re likely to both end up being late to work instead of early.”

His breath caught as Byakuya placed a soft hand in the middle of Toshiro’s chest and pushed him down onto his back.

“That sounded like an invitation,” he accused Toshiro teasingly, invading his husband’s mouth again and moving his hips to cause friction between their piqued members, “one that I don’t think I can pass up.”

“Hey,” Toshiro giggled, “you don’t have to…”

His breath left him as Byakuya’s hands pushed back the edges of his husband’s robe opening the front, then his fingers sought the erect, pink nubs on Toshiro’s chest and stimulated them shamelessly.

“Oh, that feels good enough to make me forget to go to work all day!” he panted softly, grinding against Byakuya’s body, “I know we did it a couple of times last night, but…”

“Not to worry,” Byakuya said smoothly, sliding his hand down between the younger man’s creamy thighs to begin a slow preparation.

“You sure you won’t be too late?”

“I can be a little late. Abarai always arrives later than me. It will be refreshing to take my time this morning.”

“Is that what I am? Refreshing?” Toshiro laughed, spreading his thighs wide and lifting his hips to deepen the contact with his husband’s invading fingers.

“You are enthralling,” Byakuya assured him, hooking his fingers, then attacking Toshiro’s moaning mouth and devouring the sound hungrily.

“Oh god! Oh god! That feels so good!”

“That is how you should feel, _anata_ ,” Byakuya purred in his ear, pushing his fingers in deeper and hooking them again to bring the younger man’s hips off the bed and drag a delighted howl form deep in his throat.

“B-byakuya!” Toshiro groaned, writhing as his husbands fingers moved again, teasing his body with intense pleasure.

“I am with you, my love,” Byakuya assured him, pushing Toshiro’s thighs far apart and bowing in between them.

His hand wrapped firmly around his husband’s inflamed arousal, holding off completion as he treated Toshiro a slow, unhurried assault on the younger man’s nether region with a smiling, soft mouth and unspeakably skillful, pink tongue.

“Byakuya! Oh…oh…oh just…please, just put it in. I’m wet enough!”

“Patience,” Byakuya teased him, looking into Toshiro’s riled eyes as he offered the younger man a slow lick, then almost torturously beautiful suction that brought him to the very ends of his wits.

He was sure he couldn’t stand any more, and opened his mouth to say so, only to have his opened orifice claimed as Byakuya’s strong body took possession of his.

“Oh god, yes!” he shouted around a flood of hard kisses, “Yes! Yes! God, yes!”

He held on tightly as Byakuya shed all signs of restraint and thrust into his writhing body, grinding hotly against him. And although he had been nearly at the ends of his endurance, he found new resolve to hold back. He shifted slightly, pushing Byakuya over, onto his back and mounting him. Byakuya’s hands wrapped around his naked bottom to encourage him as he rode the powerful noble.

_Even before all of this happened, and Byakuya and I fell in love, I always recognized that he was an attractive man. But everything that’s happened has shown me that he is that and so very much more! If he was beautiful at a distance, he’s crushingly so when we’re together like this, when I feel, not just the strength of his body and his passions, but his love. Even though we didn’t have a say in our first sexual joining or in the making of the babies, we have always had a say about what we would do when the babies arrived, and with them here, I have no doubts. We are a family now…Byakuya, me, our babies, Grandma and all of the rest of the ones we share our life with._

_Truly now, in a way that never was…Byakuya and I are home._

Already near climax, he fought to hold himself back, until he felt Byakuya’s body quiver in warning, and the noble made a tremulous sound of surrender. The two released together, collapsing on the bed and finishing their lovemaking with a flurry of indulgent kisses.

They laid quietly in each other’s arms after, letting their sated bodies slowly recover. Byakuya’s fingertips traced the lines of the younger man’s smiling face.

“You look quite content now,” he commented softly, “Have I satisfied your erotic cravings for now?”

“For now,” Toshiro chuckled, pulling free of Byakuya as the noble sat up, then climbed out of bed.

He placed his hands behind his head and laid back on his pillows, sighing sleepily.

“You know, you are still officially on leave,” Byakuya commented, “You could remain here for the day, or do your paperwork in our bed, if you wish.”

“I’d never subject our bed to something so boring,” the white-haired taicho snickered, “I’m just resting a little. Believe me, I’m not in a hurry to go anywhere. I will take my time and get to work eventually.”

“You do that,” Byakuya answered, leaning over him to kiss him on the forehead, then the mouth.

They started to kiss again, but paused as they heard running feet on the walkway outside the door, then Ichigo’s voice sounded in a nearby room.

“Are you okay, Tetsuya?”

“F-fine!” Tetsuya called back, “I just…am a little…ah…”

Their voices quieted then, but Byakuya shook his head and sighed.

“It sounds like Tetsuya is going to make our family grow a little more, soon,” Toshiro chuckled.

“It does,” Byakuya agreed.

“I know you don’t always agree with what Ichigo does, but you know, he’ll be a good father. He’s great with Kazuki and Kaida. I think he’s the only one Kaida doesn’t just bowl over with her willfulness. She adores him.”

“He is very good with children,” Byakuya agreed, “But more importantly, he makes my cousin extremely happy. As long as Tetsuya is content, I am willing to overlook that young man’s… _eccentricities_.”

“Well, he is, after all, the savior of Soul Society.”

“Yes, he is that,” Byakuya agreed.

The noble ran his fingers lightly along Toshiro’s cheek.

“I will see you for lunch later?” he asked, looking down into his husband’s blue eyes.

“You bet,” Toshiro answered, nodding, “Now, you’d better go before you miss the taicho’s meeting. You’re supposed to take notes for me, remember?”

“Ah yes. I will do that.”

Toshiro relaxed as Byakuya summoned his attendant and moved into the dressing area to prepare for work. He left a short time later, and Toshiro remained lazily in bed for some time longer, before getting up and letting his attendant dress him in his uniform and haori.

_It almost seems strange. For awhile, I didn’t feel like myself, but now I just feel like that self evolved a bit. I’m still motivated to be a taicho and to defend Soul Society. But, I am also a husband and a father, parent to twins, who are going to someday have a great impact on Soul Society too._

_I can’t wait to see what they’re like when they grow up._

_Or…maybe I can. I don’t want it to go too fast. No, I want to take things more slowly, and enjoy the time when the children are little. It’s challenging, especially because Byakuya and I, although we have plenty of attendants and we could just hire someone, we like to care for the children as much as we can, together. I think that’s really what’s best for them. I’m giving our kids the life that I couldn’t have, growing up, and I’m glad about that._

He finished dressing and headed out of the bedroom. As he did, he spotted Tetsuya and Ichigo emerging from their room, and Ichigo’s arm wrapped around Tetsuya supportively.

“Are you all right?” he asked in a concerned tone.

“I’m fine,” Tetsuya assured him, “I’m just pregnant. It’ll be fine.”

Tetsuya made a sound of surprise as Toshiro’s hand touched his arm in a warm, familial gesture that he wouldn’t have expected from him.

“You really will be fine,” Toshiro said with certainty, “We’re all going to be with you, making sure that you have everything you need.”

“Th-thank you, Toshiro. That is kind of you to say.”

“It’s true,” Toshiro insisted, “Tetsuya, I didn’t really get a chance to tell you what it meant to me when I developed that dangerous condition during my pregnancy, and you were there to help me through it.”

“Oh, you don’t have to…”

“I know. I want to,” Toshiro said firmly, “Your quick thinking and your unselfish decision to bond with me to help me, saved both me and the children.”

“Oh, you probably…”

“No, Kisuke knows, and he said that we would not have survived without your quick thinking and the risk you took. Just, please accept my gratitude and know I’ll be there for you also.”

“Thank you,” Tetsuya said, smiling, “That means a lot.”

“It means a lot to me too,” Ichigo added, “Thanks, Toshiro.”

Toshiro gave the ginger-haired man a look of mock sternness.

“That’s Hitsugaya-Kuchiki taicho to you.”

“Who can even say that?” Ichigo snickered.

“I believe that I just did,” Toshiro said primly.

His head turned in the direction of a feisty squall that sounded from within a nearby room.

“If you’ll excuse me, I need to attend to my daughter.”

An amused smile touched his lips as he headed away from Ichigo and Tetsuya, heading for the ever more demanding cries.

_She knows I’m coming to take her out. Kaida loves getting out where she can see lots different things. She loves the flowers in the gardens, falling rain, all sorts of things. She’s not hard at all to parent when she’s focused on something she likes to look at or listen to. So, I just keep her really, really busy._

He entered the nursery and found his attendant holding the wriggling, squawking Kaida. As soon as she spotted Toshiro, she squealed and kicked her feet, reaching for him with her hands. Nearby, Torio held a quietly observing Kazuki.

“Just a minute, now, Kaida,” he scolded his daughter gently, “I’m going to hold Kazuki for a moment.

He took the baby boy from the attendant and hugged him gently, petting his hair and talking softly to him.

“Good morning, Kazuki,” he said, smiling warmly and watching the baby boy smile and reach out to him, “I hope you slept well.”

He spent several minutes focusing on the boy and ignoring the squawking baby girl. By the time he finished with Kazuki, Kaida was in a full-blown tantrum.

“Why are you so grumpy today?” Toshiro ask, tilting his head and frowning at her, “You need to wait more patiently. After all, you’re going with me today and Kazuki is staying home this time. Come now.”

He lifted the baby girl into is arms and placed her in an outward facing carrying sack on his chest. Kaida squealed happily at her new situation, and she waved her arms excitedly as Toshiro left Kuchiki Manor and headed for the now fully restored Squad Ten Headquarters. He walked through the bustling street, his mind growing contemplative as he looked around at the recently restored buildings all around him.

_You could look at this place and forget, if you wanted to, that so many people lost their lives here, and that all of this was knocked down and burned away. I know a lot of people want to forget, but I think that even though that’s tempting, I won’t forget the good things that happened in the wake of all of that tragedy. Byakuya and I became involved, and together, we made this beautiful little family we have now. I’m never going to forget that, or how lucky I am that we’re together, and that we have the kids._

He slowed as they approached the Tenth Division Headquarters.

“Ready?” he chuckled, “You’re about to get your cheeks pinched and have someone babble at you for hours. Although, you seem to hold your own in that daperatment, don’t you?”

“Da!”

Toshiro carried the baby girl into the office, stopping just inside the door to glare at Rangiku, who spotted them and sprang to her feet, hurrying over to greet them.

“Morning, Taicho!” Rangiku called out, grinning and extending her arms, while the baby girl did the same, “Time for girl talk!”

She stole the baby form the carrying pack and began talking to here animatedly.

Toshiro headed to his desk and sat down, half watching Rangiku chattering at the baby, as he worked on a tall stack of unfinished reports.

_It’s good to be back here. Despite the fact that Rangiku is useless in getting any work done, it feels good to get back to something that feels like normal._

He took a closer look at his and Byakuya’s now cooing daughter and sighed happily.

_Be happy and grow strong, little one, because one day, you are going to be a powerful protector of Soul Society, just like your father and me._

**The End**


End file.
